My brain feels weird if it is quiet - i can try stop compulsions and rumination’s but ill be bombarded by thoughts Is this going to last forever - im trying but it seems like its getting more intense
Your brain is genuinely not used to being quiet and is trying to get back to "normal". Getting used to a new normal will take a long time and many attempts, and you will feel frustrated, but this won't last forever.
I relate to this. When I’m feeling decent, I self sabotaging to get some of those intrusive thoughts going. It’s familiar. And when the thoughts aren’t as intense, it feels like I stopped caring which opens a whole new can of worms.
experiencing all of this
Same. It’s like my brain thinks “if everything is right, then something must be wrong!” Why won’t it just leave me in peace?!