I am so grateful that I have this community

My main theme and really the only one that bothers me since this all began a year and a half ago is pocd. I have a lot of guilt and shame tied into this theme due to my past and my current thoughts. With nocd and therapy and getting back to working and everything it has been at bay for months up until i was retriggered by a dream and extra stress/anxiety that i have been going through recently. I feel myself slowly slipping back into that dark place but i am trying to cling on and not let that happen. I just want to say even though sometimes i use this group as reassurance and it can be a compulsion I am so thankful that there are others out there that understand and wont judge. This disorder is horrid and there have been many days where i have contemplated on ending it due to the pain and suffering that I have endured since developing this theme. I eventually want to be a mom but sometimes it seems so out of reach. I hope one day this theme really wont have a hold on me like it does and that everyone else who suffers can feel the same sense of relief. Keep holding on and keep putting one foot in front of the other❤️