Explore more posts

Username: RiRiRavioli8

Date posted: 1y ago

Lightbulb with text that reads "Auto-generated title"

Struggling with OCD and derealization after becoming a new mom.

Existential OCD, Derealization, New mom

Hi y’all! I’ve had OCD since 7 or 8 years old, but wasn’t fully diagnosed until I was in my twenties after having a major panic attack. This triggered my derealization and had intrusive thoughts that nothing was real, that everything was a projection of my imagination. My OCD was pretty quiet until now, 15 mos after having my precious babygirl (i figured it latches on to the things/people we cherish the most). My OCD is making me think that she isn’t real and it is making it hard for me to enjoy moments with my baby. It’s been a struggle and I’m hoping to find some light. 🥺

Username: Dee CDee C

Date posted: 1y ago

Sorry you’re going through this. I can relate to the existential thoughts. From time to time I catch myself going down the OCD rabbit hole at which point I lean towards the uncertainty. Maybe the kids are a figment of my imagination or maybe they’re not. This is my OCD and I choose not to engage it. And the times when I get hugs from them, I’ll live in the present and cherish the moment with them - In defiance of the OCD thoughts. Please know that you’re not alone!!!

Username: RiRiRavioli8RiRiRavioli8

Date posted: 1y ago

@Dee C Thank you so much for the kind words. I’ve tried making a joke out of my current thoughts, like “if my daughter isn’t real, then why can’t her poopy diaper change itself”…it helps for the time being until my obsession ceases.

Username: Stacy QuickStacy Quick

User type: Therapist

Date posted: 1y ago

I feel for you so much. I think that anytime a big life event happens (birth of a child, etc) it can definitely trigger OCD. OCD also is known to attack what we value. Check out these resources:https://youtu.be/rmH50bTp1zs,https://youtu.be/WH86RW-KGaY

Username: Dee CDee C

Date posted: 1y ago

@NOCD Therapist - Stacy Q. OMG that’s so on point!!! Thank you 🙏🏽

Username: Stacy QuickStacy Quick

User type: Therapist

Date posted: 1y ago

@Dee C - Thanks!!

Username: hellopeoplehellopeople

User type: NOCD Alumni

Date posted: 1y ago

I’m so sorry 😞 that sounds so difficult. Isn’t it horrible that OCD latches into people we love? I’ve actually had the same thoughts targeted at my parents, I would be talking to them but then get intrusive thoughts saying they weren’t real, it’s very terrifying, I’m so sorry you’re going through this. It still happens sometimes but I learned that I can feel discomfort and keep living, saying to myself “yeah maybe they aren’t real right now, that’s okay” and my mind and body can feel off but I just ignore it and try to keep doing what I was doing. Being ok with the discomfort I learned through ERP! I hope you get some relief from this theme and enjoy your time with your precious baby ☺️

Username: RiRiRavioli8RiRiRavioli8

Date posted: 1y ago

@hellopeople It’s definitely tough, thank you for the encouragement. I know that time and *trying* to live in the moment are key!

Username: LavenderLavender

Date posted: 1y ago

I have absolutely had this happen to me and its so terrifying. The thing about those thoughts is we literally cant know the answer… and at the end of the day even if it is all a projection, the love you feel for your kids is still important. 💖

Username: RiRiRavioli8RiRiRavioli8

Date posted: 1y ago

@Lavender Totally agree❤️ I’m just trying to enjoy each moment with her and invite my thoughts to sit, which dampens the fear that fuels it. One day I’ll be able to laugh at even having that thought.

Username: LavenderLavender

Date posted: 1y ago

@RiRiRavioli8 Omg I hope that for you and me 😅

Username: RiRiRavioli8RiRiRavioli8

Date posted: 1y ago

I’d also like to mention that I’m a working mom and took on a new promotion at work that has created more stress for me. I’m sure that has something to do with it. This recent flare up is just so hard to deal with!

Username: AnmacannAnmacann

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

I understand the thoughts and feelings that things are not real. I have had to let it pass and get into my body in the past. My senses.

Username: RiRiRavioli8RiRiRavioli8

Date posted: 1y ago

@Anmacann Thank you for the encouragement. I just hate how OCD literally targets my loved ones. 🥺

Username: AnmacannAnmacann

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

@RiRiRavioli8 It targets everything I care about or fear losing the most

Username: Mij

Date posted: 5y ago

(quick disclaimer that this is very hard for me to talk about and I’m thankful for any input you ladies could offer.) I’m a first time mom and loving it. However, I noticed my OCD spiking near the end of my pregnancy and it has only intensified since then. It manifests itself in sooo many different ways, at this point it’s getting impossible to manage. I bounced between therapist as a teenager but once I was living alone with my fiancé, I immediately developed a habit of “blacking/blanking out” at the time of my therapy sessions. I tried to reschedule but the same thing would always happen somehow. No pretty way to say it, we’re poor. Lower middle class.. if even. And as I was getting the courage to inquire about a state healthcare-covered therapist, I got a letter saying I was no longer eligible for insurance. I don’t know what to do. My OCD is truly putting my relationship to the test. My fiancé really has no clue how my mind works anymore, he can’t understand my logic (or lack of) and gets frustrated quickly. I’m scared it’ll eventually affect my daughter. Going to my family for help would be a mistake (been there, deeply regret that) and I’m against prescription drugs for many reasons. Does anybody else have OCD? How do you keep it from controlling your life?

Relationship OCD

Username: RC

Date posted: 4y ago

Anyone else a new mom here going through postpartum OCD?

Username: Caree

Date posted: 2y ago

I’m a new mom with out of control OCD

I’m a mom of a 6 month old and my OCD has gotten so bad that my brain constantly convinces me that I’m doing something bad to her or feeling a gross way about her to the point where I don’t even want to be near her. This is breaking my heart because I love my daughter so much and had such a strong bond with her and this is killing me and making me sad/feel disgusting at the same time.

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond

Struggling with OCD and derealization after becoming a new mom.

Related posts

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Be a part of the largest OCD Community