Does anyone feel that there are times when OCD is latching on to everything. Different themes of intrusive thoughts... It's like being allegric to everything. Everything worries me and scares me and I feel like I might go crazy. I keep thinking how will I get through the day tomorrow. Could this possibly get worse than it already is? Am I going to have a mental breakdown? I don't remember the last time I was able to actually feel relaxed.
I can relate, the storm in your mind is accurate description. While I have one main theme my ocd bounces too. I try not to think of future days and just focus on what Iām doing right now to help myself. Mindfulness and attention training (look up on YouTube) has been helpful
Iām so scared that Iām gonna go ā insaneā and everything is an intrusive thought to me as. Well
That's how OCD tricks you....especailly when you are feeling stressed. I'm feeling really stressed and scared but I know that I have been through this before and I wont let OCD win.
@Sarahš thatās how it is for me , and Iāve been in a state of dissociation for like a week now itās been so bad.
Another thing I would like to write is that I did not know this was OCD and I did not know anything about ERP. The therapy that I attended for a while was mainly talk therapy and I wasn't advised on how to manage OCD from an OCD therapy specialist. That's not to say that at the time it didn't help but I also wasn't dealing with the amount and themes of intrusive thoughts I'm dealing with now and for the past 2 years. I think that sometimes I think that a different combination of approaches may help. And the ERP approach is helpful but I have yet to fully work on it....like I mentioned in previous posts I only had therapy with NOCD therapist for a few months because I could not afford to continue (no insurance) and also I was starting to feel so much better and I believed at that moment that if I was feeling much much better then my days were easier I was able to be more happy (had intrusive thoughts but I managed). This year however has been so difficult (new and old intrusive thoughts, some thoughts I had before and other intrusive thoughts I never had before which has been really distressing, and sad heartbreaking for me).
@Sarahš Iām sorry youāre struggling. I wish therapy had more financial aid, because I can relate. Especially when you need to go weekly š. Sometimes I avoid erp too because I panic more
Literally me right now. Iām so sorry youāre going through it too. I just started on Prozac because I canāt handle it
I'm sorry that you are going through this as well. I sometimes wonder what life would be like without OCD lol. I used to take prozac 2 years ago.
@Sarahš Whatād you think of it?? I was debating on starting
@halem77 - To be honest...it did help me out (this was before I knew that this was OCD...I was dealing with a lot of intrusive thoughts and I didn't know it was OCD and the therapist and Psychiatrist I was seeing at the time were nice and helpful but they didn't say anything about OCD and what the proper treatment was. In all honesty it did help me out a lot (I might have had intrusive thoughts but at the time they weren't as much as now and with the medication the intrusive thoughts were easier to ignore and not as loud). After a while of taking Prozac it didn't help as well as it did before (I took it for around 4 years and when I did see the Psychiatrist and I did go from 1 pill to 2 pills). After a while I found that it wasn't helping as much again and I decided to stop gradually (I did not consult a Psychiatrist which was a mistake) but I did stop gradually over the time of maybe a month and a half. I just didn't want to keep increasing the dose and taking prozac for a longer time (in my own opinion and experience taking prozac medication) Around 10 months later I had more intrusive thoughts to deal with and many themes that I did not have before (I do not think it was necessarily becasue I was no longer taking the prozac I think it is a combination of what OCD is like and stress/worry in my life as well as the world being stressful in general). Maybe when I was taking the prozac like I mentioned before it either made it easier to ignore the intrusive thoughts or something l ike that. (I'm trying to write the simplified and summarized experience and view I have on prozac) I obviously advise you to talk to a Psychiatrist and therapist that know about OCD.
@Sarahš Thank you for sharing! Thatās how I feel too, I donāt want to be on the medication forever or keep up in the dose and feel like a zombie or anything. But sometimes itās just so crippling that I just donāt know what else to do I may try it. Do you notice a lot of side effects? I am suss over side effects but also sometimes I just create them in my head. Do you think youāll get on it again?
@halem77 - I understand what you mean. When I started to take prozac it was before I knew it was OCD and it was a few years back and I remember it was difficult for me to understand what I was going through because I did not know why I was dealing/struggling with the intrusive thoughts I was struggling so much (I just knew that this was anxiety..I did not know that this was OCD or how to manage it from the OCD therapy perspective). It did greatly help me to take prozac (I was able to finish and graduate university and live life more without as much mental distress...it wasn't all perfect but it did help) but again I got to a point where it wasn't working as much. I don't remember having any side effects except for when I started taking medication I would have headaches and maybe a little bit of nausea and that went away after a few weeks (that is normal for taking prozac) Remember I'm just letting you know my experience and obviously consult a OCD psychiatrist and psychologist/therapist. Another thing it is extremely important to work on managing OCD regardless of medication because the medicaiton can only help you as much as it can and then it might not help forever. I hope this helps.
@Sarahš - I also forgot to mention that after a while I felt more numb (I don't like to use the word numb but it was more difficult to cry for example and that made me feel worried and annoyed because I cry easily especailly when I would be sad or anxious or struggling with intrusive thoughts) I still would feel happy, sad, angry but it wasn't as easy to cry sometimes (I wasn't as emotional) that's another reason I decided to not continue taking prozac. I do not regret taking the medication because I needed it at the time and it did help me out a lot, however, I knew even when I started taking the medication I told myself that this was not forever it was only for a certain.
@Sarahš Thank you for sharing! I did just start it. I canāt function and Iām crippled with thoughts and anxiety. Sometimes I can recognize what is ocd. Itās like I donāt have logic š š
Anyone else just have days where they feel more calm and donāt have as many intrusive thoughts? But then later at night time it just comes back so you only had relief even for a little bit šš I feel like even when Iām not having my OCD send me intrusive thoughts, I always have a feeling in my stomach that something is wrong/off or a sense of doom. I always just feel on edge and anxious as if my mind is always preparing itself for the next horrifying intrusive thought to torment me with ugh š«
Iāve tried living in the uncertainty today & kept myself busy but I canāt shake this feeling that Iām about to lose control & act on my thoughts. I keep feeling like I need to check in to see how I feel & keep my self safe & when Iām near my trigger it feels like Iām being pulled into doing it & feels like I want to but Iām not using compulsions. My thoughts feel like my own & feeling like Iāll be like this forever. Can someone relate or give advice š©
I donāt even know where to start because thereās so much going on in my head and it feels like thereās so much evidence for every thought. Like my ocd feels like it doesnāt just have one specific theme itās honestly every theme and it just switches throughout the day depending on the thoughts I have. This started all about a month ago, this whole ocd flare up. Iāve been diagnosed with ocd for about 3 years now and looking back on my childhood, I feel like Iāve had it for probably my entire life. My grandpa just recently died back in February and I feel like this whole ocd spiral is a result of dealing with grief especially because it didnāt even hit me for the whole month of April for some reason and things felt ānormalā. But since this ocd flare up has started Iāve been constantly reviewing and revisiting my past, all my childhood memories and so many of them are terrifying which is weird because I never had a traumatic event hppen to me as a child. I feel like itās always been āself-inflictedā trauma if that makes sense? My mind is telling me so many things related to so many topics like maybe I liked my family member as a kid and have just hid it to fit in with society? That my anxiety as a kid has caught up with me and Iām turning into a psychopath? That Iāve always been a creep and enjoyed looking at peoples privates or chests, etc but just ignored or allowed the thought this whole time. Also before this whole flare up I remember always feeling on autopilot and not really alive like everything I did I just felt numb about it. Which aids my ocd to tell me that these feelings are real and the thoughts are true and that Iām āwaking upā or realizing or something. I havenāt felt such intense anxiety and distress since I was a kid and I didnāt even understand my own thoughts. Itās like Iām either hyper aware or totally unaware of whatās going on around me and it gets me thinking about my existence, personality, what my role in life is and like genuinely what Iām even doing in the moment like whatās the reason behind everything. Iām constantly questioning my intentions because I donāt know if theyāre true or not and itās like my ocd doesnāt even allow me to consider the thought it just jumps to conclusion. Like telling me Iām guilty before proven innocent. It honestly feels like so much at once to even simply call it ocd or anxiety because it feels like a crisis and any moment I could spiral and breakdown completely. Going to school everyday feeling like anytbing could trigger a panic attack at any moment makes me feel like I canāt be left alone with my thoughts. And like overall since I got down this rabbit hole, my first obsession was harm to myself, then it was harm to others specifically my family, then it was being a pervert or pedo, or being attracted or someone or something I shouldnāt be, which then makes me question my existence and who I am along with also being hyper aware of my facial movements like my eyebrows, nose, etc. Like why does ocd have to involve itself in every aspect of my life? It feels like thereās always something wrong that I need to fix.
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond
