- Username
- Rach456
- Date posted
- 6y ago
I’ve been struggling with this recently, too. It’s extremely difficult and confusing. I haven’t even been diagnosed with OCD but I have talked to specialist and they agree that they are just intrusive thoughts. Just remember who you were before all of this and remind yourself that it’s just fear. The fear latched on to this because it’s what you find to be the most horrible thing in the world. What helps me is understanding that there’s a difference between my thoughts and my true self. The thoughts are always in the back of my mind and I’m always scared that they’ll give me a panic attack again or something, but I know who I am and you know who you are. Another helpful thing I found was understanding that the content of the thoughts do not matter, this is just what scares me the most. A lot of the time I’d be like “i would rather have any other obsession than this”, but no matter what the obsession is we’d still have the severe anxiety and fears. ERP helps, I haven’t come with a treatment plan yet but I’ll do self erp therapy sometimes. I’ll force myself to think I am a pedo and the thoughts are true, and I think it made me feel more rational and able to see through the lies anxiety is feeding me. I’m so sorry you’re going through this, I wish you the best of luck!
I have had POCD for several years now. I’m currently working on it in ERP therapy using scripting. Basically I have recorded myself saying my fear and have to listen to it for 30+ mins a day. This is why: you cannot be bored by a thought and terrified at the same time. Part of the reason it is scary is because it is a new thought. By listening over and over again the words lose their power.
The the OCD Mindfullness workbook as script prompts for this is you are interested in this
It’s by Jon Hershfield. Secret trick, go to Google books and then type in the title. Then you can search within the text (search pedophilia) and it will let you see the pages where that is mentioned. If you want to record yourself saying the script aloud there is an app on iPhone under extras called voice memo that allows you to make voice recordings
When my thoughts were at there worst, my panic attacks were horrendous! I was told by the councillor it is just a thought, and we’re is the evidence to support the thought? It was said to me, the distress you are feeling is because it upsets you so much! I have always describe my thoughts, like a Nightmare on repeat. I hope this helps
Yes, it sucks, but after a while I just ignored the thoughts.
Hi I’ve had similar thoughts about myself but now I suspect most close family members of being pedos. The problem is when was young I saw my parents have intercourse more than once. I’ve since convinced myself they must have enjoyed knowing I was there and I can’t get rid of the idea. I feel like it’s eating my brain. It has come up and I’ve never had a good explanation-I guess there isn’t one. I am so tired. I used to imagine adulthood as this far away place where these things wouldn’t bother me any more but they will not go away.
Yes. Luckily it’s almost gone. Best of luck!
How you getting of your pocd, @i can’t think of a username?
Getting rid of*
@WorriedDriver Where can I find that book? Who is it by?
Exposure and talking back
What is talking back?
Calling OCD out
Need some advice here as I feel like such a sick twisted person..I feel like I may have sexual intrusive thoughts ocd but sometimes I think it’s just me and my twisted brain- intrusive thoughts about my family members has turned into pedophilia ocd and what makes it worse is that I work with children. Lately I’ve been seeing sexual intrusive images of me sexually abusing young children normally male, and I am obviously distressed by them and I would never act on that but it makes me feel like I would actually do that cause of the feeling I would get and it’s all so confusing and scary cause I would never do that to a child. Please someone help that has maybe been through a similar experience?
Im sorry for a long post but I'm very scared Prior to few weeks ago I didn't have any sexual thoughts regarding children EVER, and if I did then I really can't remember. But ever since I started worrying about the possibility that I might be attracted to them, I just felt severely awful. And it's getting worse and worse overtime. What started as just me worrying that I might be attracted to kids has now turned into a deep belief that there is a very dark and real part of me that is, in fact, a pedophile. I even started having intrusive but pleasurable fantasies about children and it's driving me absolutely sick. I really wish that it's just a very extreme form of POCD and not actually me turning into a monster, but with each passing day my hope is fading away, replaced with pure disgust in myself and unwillingness to live like this. Has anyone here ever went through something similar?
Serious trigger warning here for POCD and suicide. I have these thoughts, urges, and feelings that are terrifying. I don’t act on them and I believe I would never act on them but it feels so real and horrible. I don’t know how this started and I want to believe I am a good person but I’m just so scared that I’m going to do something terrible. And even just these thoughts scare me to my core and make me think, “oh what if I am a pedophile” even though I know I’m not, and I don’t know how to deal with them. When I can keep myself busy it gets easier to forget this stuff, but if I have downtime I can’t get it out of my head. I had a young girl, most likely middle school age, come into my work with her parents today and I was terrified of the idea that I could be attracted to her. I don’t believe I truly am but my thoughts get so aggressive that I don’t even know what to believe. I avoid a lot of things but sometimes you don’t have the option to avoid and it just gets things further stuck in my head and I end up fixating on awful things. I wake up with this stuff floating around my mind and I can’t get it to go away. I’ve even considered just ending it to all to make it easier on myself and to make sure that I never have the opportunity to act on these horrible thoughts and feelings. I don’t ever want to do these things and I know it may sound ridiculous, but the consequences of these actions I haven’t committed scare me as well such as people no longer trusting or loving me, prison, hurting someone else in any way, not being a good person, etc. I just can’t find anything that helps fix this. I have broken down many times due to this issue and I feel like it’ll never go away. I know killing my sled is not the answer and I know I will never act on any of this but the thoughts and feelings are so aggressive that I live in an almost constant state of fear of my own mind and body. I hate this. What did I do to deserve to suffer this way? Why me? Why can’t I just be a normal person with normal human thoughts and why of all forms of OCD did it’s have to be this one? I don’t know what to do. Someone please help me fix this before I lose hope.
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond