- Date posted
- 2y
People with so-ocd in relationships
Hello everyone. I just wanted to know is there anyone with soocd that is in a relationship?? How do you cope and be happy or content in your relationship??
Hello everyone. I just wanted to know is there anyone with soocd that is in a relationship?? How do you cope and be happy or content in your relationship??
I do! I also have rocd. Its hard but I’ve gotten ok at telling myself “maybe I am maybe I’m not” and just doing to the opposite of what I want to do because of ocd. So say I want to avoid giving my boyfriend a kiss because I dont want to start questioning whether I liked it which would lead to me questioning my sexuality- I kiss him anymore. Say I have a compulsion to look at a girl for a long period of time to see if I’m attracted to her- I resist the questioning and tell myself “maybe I am maybe im not.”
@hiitsemmy Anyway* not “anymore”
I am so sorry can I ask one more question Thank you for responding as well. Have you ever had the thought it may be because you haven't experimented with the same sex that is why you don't know??
@Anonymous Yeah I used to have that thought too. I am bisexual and I’ve had a girlfriend! Having a girlfriend didn’t make the thoughts go away. I still feel the way that “well maybe I just didnt do enough sexual stuff with her to truly know if im gay” but when I find myself thinking in black and white like im either gay or straight then I know its ocd. I also know its ocd when I feel urgency to figure out the answer or I get so scared im going to have to leave my boyfriend if I find out im gay. I try my hardest to accept the thoughts and to remind myself to just say “maybe, maybe not.” Also dont apologize for having questions! it really helps to talk with someone who experiences the same things
@hiitsemmy I know you weren't responding to me but oh my god, what you were saying about Black and White making you know it's OCD... as a bisexual with brutal SOOCD who always feels like it has to be one or the other, thank you
@hiitsemmy Thank you for answering my questions I keep having thoughts that I should experiment and if I did I would know even though I don't have genuine desire or want to do so. I just want the questioning and doubts to stop even though I am happy and fulfilled in my relationship.
Hi all! I was wondering if anyone being treated with ROCD and/or SOOCD has some advice on how they handle the things *with* their partner. For context, my ex and I were together ~7 months before we broke up a year ago, in large part due to my severe anxiety from untreated ROCD/SOOCD. I’ve gotten a lot better through NOCD treatment and we’ve been friends since then. But we’re currently in a “situationship” kind of stage, where I think we’re both trying to figure out if the relationship is still feasible, and I’m finding that I’m a lot more triggered as the relationship nears becoming “serious” again. We’re both really trying to figure out the healthiest way to handle when things get hard for me. Does anyone have input about what they’ve learned or found what has worked in their own relationships? Some specific questions: - I’ve found that when getting really triggered in my own head, I have no clue if I should explain how I’m feeling to my partner or how we should address it together. How do you differentiate between communicating versus falling into the confessing/reassurance trap? - Related to the above, my partner and I are both a bit lost on the best way for him to respond when I’m really paranoid (for examples, I have major I’m-being-cheated-on paranoia and overanalyze if I’m enjoying sex enough), or if I’m overreacting to feeling rejected/misunderstood (e.g. “he didn’t respond to my comment just now, he doesn’t care/he doesn’t get me/maybe we shouldn’t be together…”) - How much does your partner know about ROCD/SOOCD in general? How much have you shared with them about your thoughts and experiences? I’ve explained both subtypes and some of my thought processes to him, but definitely not all of it, and I’m not sure how much is helpful for him to know. Answers to any or all of the questions are very much appreciated. Thanks so much in advance! Hope you’re all well 💗
I’ve struggled a lot with mental illness (severe social anxiety, depression, OCD), but have done a lot of work to get to the great place that I’m at now. I feel like a different person compared to how I felt a few years ago. Here’s my question: I started seeing someone really important to me. We’re not official yet, but we’ve been in each others lives for years and it feels like it’s the real deal. He struggles with OCD, and it’s much worse than mine ever was. My question is, do you think this is healthy for me, as someone who has done the work to get to a better place? He’s not in therapy, he’s against medication (I love my meds — they changed my life), and is generally in a different place than I am mentally.
Hello everyone, I just wanted to share a part of my journey that I’m struggling with right now. I’ve been diagnosed with ocd and while this is not my first subtype, ROCD and so ocd have definitely been the ones I’ve been struggling with the most. For context I have a boyfriend who I love very much and am terrified of loosing. That’s probably what ocd latched onto. The so-ocd especially is tricky because I’ve come to acknowledge that I am bisexual. Don’t worry I didn’t “discover” this through ocd, I’ve always known and it’s been in the back of my mind way before ocd, I had just never really directly acknowledged it because romantically I just always leaned towards men. The thing my ocd latched onto is “what if you are actually a lesbian and don’t know it yet and will have to leave your partner or are lying to your partner or end up leading him on” The thing is, I don’t have much experience with women except kissing my female best friend once, which didn’t feel special or made me have romantic feelings for her. I’ve always seeked men more actively than women and didn’t feel like I was gonna miss out if I get into a serious relationship with a man before having had more experience. I just know that I can be sexually attracted to women as well. But now that I’m in this beautiful relationship I’m terrified of getting it wrong or having missed something about myself or being scared that I’m actually a lesbian and have been lying to myself all along. I’m not seeking reassurance, just wanting to share and maybe someone else is going through something similar? If so I’d be so grateful to know I’m not alone. I love my boyfriend dearly and i really hope we will work out in the long run.
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