Any advice? Would be nice to know if it has been overcome :( I keep thinking i slept with someone at a party and just forgot until recently (2years after the event)
I did! My theme is not longer that. Just gotta do ERP and embrace uncertainty. Maybe you did cheat maybe you didn’t.
@Just another OCD guy Ahh im so glad you got over it! 🥹🥹 i feel like I have to tell my boyfriend so badly but I dont think he will understand 😭😭 this thought wont leave me
@Anonymous Sometimes I’ll get triggered and I’ll spiral for a little bit but nothing like before. And yeah don’t tell your boyfriend. I told my wife every single “memory” I had and it only stressed her out. I would definitely find a therapist to help you create good ERP exercises. Mine made me write down a story of how I cheated and with who and made me read it 3 times a day. I also saw a lot of videos of couples breaking up over cheating. Hope this helps :)
@Just another OCD guy Thank you so much for the advice I’ll definitely try some other ERPs (i am currently doing script writing)- can i just ask how you feel towards those false memories (because i feel like its so real but just out of my character)
@Anonymous Yeah I feel the exact same. It all started after a night of heavy drinking. I blacked out and had to get carried home and I randomly started worrying over if I cheated. Even though I asked all the people I was with if they saw me do anything and they all said I didn’t do anything wrong but I just kept creating scenarios in my head and they felt real.
So, I know my capacity to get fixated on things. And it's normally something that's relatively remote but, my latest issue is really getting to me and I was wondering if people have any advice. I'm avoiding getting too into specifics, as I don't want this to get reassurance-y but, in essence.. I came to the realisation recently that people who I'd been "friends" (feels like the wrong term now) when I was younger were not very nice people, and normalized a lot of very unpleasant behaviour towards other members of the group. They really normalized it, sold themselves as figures of authority, as older and more responsible and grown-up than others, and looking back, they acted horribly. And coming to this realisation, that I'd been manipulated into just accepting their behaviour has just... broken me. My OCD has latched onto it and I can't stop feeling irreversibly tainted by it. I've talked to others about it, and they've reassured me, told me it's not a big deal and that I hold myself to too high a standard, but none of that sticks. I feel better for a bit, then think 'Maybe when you told them you were skewing it to make yourself look better' or 'Did you leave out a crucial detail'. I keep ruminating over and over, trying to remember exactly how everything played out, trying to figure out if I fed into the behaviour, if I did something bad myself (because y'know, I feel like I was accepting of it at the time, so what does it say about my own values?). I know I need to stop doing all this if I want to improve, but then some part of me keeps saying 'So, you're just going to let yourself off the hook then?' Normally, I can rationalize my own fears to some degree, assure myself something won't happen, but the realness of the situation, and the fact I only came to understand the reality of it because the thought had been bothering me means it feels so much more all-encompassing. I know confessing in itself is a compulsion, but I keep feeling that if I'm not I'm somehow concealing what I 'really am' from others around me, and any positive interactions are me deceiving them in some way. I feel like I can't enjoy anything in life right now, and a good part of me feels I should not enjoy it ever again. If anybody has any advice on it, I'm all ears. Or even hearing if you relate to these feelings, I might appreciate the solidarity at least.
If I cheated on my boyfriend or did something unloyal , would it come to mind 8 months later? Wouldn’t I have felt and known about it and that it was wrong the second it had happened ? If I wasn’t worried about it 8 months ago, should I worry about it now ? I have major ocd involving cheating and relationships and self doubt .
i feel like i have been posting a lot about this and i will try to stop since now but i just don't know where to start or what to do, and i can't take therapy right now either. my event is about something that did actually happen; i had a boyfriend and we had a 1.5 age difference (i know this sounds stupid) but the thing is that we both started to sext a lot since he was 14 and i was 15. we shared audios videos pictures ect and i don't know how to just let this go, even when i know that i never really forced him into anything and i was always constantly worried about him being comfortable, when to stop and ect. the memories keep coming back to my mind and the guilt is eating me up slowly because i keep thinking that i'm a predator or a groomer or something like that. i don't know how to deal with the what ifs either, lately i haven't stopped thinking what if i sexually harassed or sexually exploited him or something like that. how do i deal with the cycle of guilt and constant what ifs if i also feel like my event is worse than others i've seen? please help me with this. it's getting a lil tiring and even if somedays i know how to deal with this, i still get really triggered sometimes. this wouldn't even bother me before, i wish i could just get back in time before this theme popped into my mind. my life has been a hell since then and i live constantly scared and suicidal.
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