New Diagnosis, relationship grief?

Hello Friend, thanks for posting. While it may be painful, the past is the past. You cannot think away that painful experience because it has already happened. The best thing you can do is use that experience as a learning experience. You are right where your supposed to be. What are you thankful for from that experience?

It is okay to grieve what you lost. It is sad- mental illness and disability can mean lost time for many. It is normal to wish things had been different, but it could help to accept you did exactly what you were able to do at that time. I assume you have been getting therapy now, and while I would never reassure you that you’ll never have panic attacks again, I know OCD responds to the treatments we find here. Don’t decide for other people whether or not you are “too much” or not good enough as a partner. You can’t change the past, but you can try again.

This is exactly how I’m feeling. I’m in a relationship with an absolutely gorgeous, intelligent, kind, girl. I look at her and i melt, i don’t even know how i was lucky enough to get her. She’s my dream girl. Perfect in every way, amazing family that accepts me and loves me. However I’ve been having spiralling ocd episodes that last weeks, like “where i start thinking do i actually love her? Am i in love with her? What if i continue this relationship and fall out of love with her? What if i break her heart? do i have butterflies when i see her?” i don’t want to self sabotage my relationship cause i will never find anyone like her again. I don’t what to do