Does anyones ocd got to this point?

So i realized why i thought im in danger or im dangerous to others. I have harm ocd and at some point my ocd told me that the only way i can make this go away is if i act on it. And then i started thinking im in danger, i need to go to a hospital or something, and because i was thinking "is this thought true?" i thought that that means i actually thinking about it cause my mind was answering with "yes its true". Then i started feeling like i want to do it and i will do it so i started to go crazy and panic. That made it worse that i read in the past that someone with ocd actually acted on their obsessive thought cause he thought then it will go away. So this is were that feeling of i want to do those bad things come, i didnt do anything tho, but does anyone had the same experience? How to react to that when my ocd tells me the only way to make it go away if i act on it?

Steven55!

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

So sorry you are going through this. I've been there and it's very scary. A few thoughts: 1. The fact that it's scaring you and causing you anxiety is an indication that there's not much chance that you'd actually commit any of the intrusive thoughts. 2. When I was going through much the same thing my therapist had me challenge OCD. She asked me write down all the reasons why OCD is telling me to commit these acts, i.e...what good it would do for me. Obviously, the list was short. Then, she had me ask OCD what kind of factual data it had to support its suggestions. Does OCD have a crystal ball that can see the future? Of course not, so the factual data was non-existent, just a "malware" suggestion. I received a great deal of relief practicing this exercise and still practice it to this day when I experience a flare up. 3. Keep using the ERP tools. I can only speak for myself, but they work for me. When I have a flare up, I accept the uncertainty that, no matter how miniscule the chance, some day in the future I may actually physically act on any of the intrusive thoughts, because I don't know the future. I then ask myself: am I doing it now? Am I plotting to do it? Do I have a choice? I stay in the present, not in the "what if(s)." Over time using these tools my anxiety level has dissipated to the point where I now live in relative tranquility. Hope this helps. Hang in there, it will get better!

PRIV8

Date posted: 2y

My mind is really creative. Actually i dont know why but i did the same as you but mentally, i asked what are the reasons i would do them, then my mind gave me reasons, 1. Because this will never end and youre sick with this life(this is why i was afraid im suicidal cause having these responses sounds really like that,but i was still panicking) 2. Because if you do the harm thoughts , you hurt someone maybe you learn how is it really and you will never do it, 3. Maybe you like it, who knows, just try it, and 4. You want to hurt people because what they did in the past to you, they bullied you, you were always weak in their eyes. These are all answers that really sick minded people would think, no suprise that i was really feeling bad and had panic that im going insane and i will act on these thoughts.

LuisMadison

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

Please mark this as a trigger warning next time. Your ocd is lying to you. Also please talk to the people your ocd is obsessing over and talk to your therapist about this.

Steven55!

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

Yes, OCD can get really creative. Please know that you're not alone. Others, including myself, have gone through this. Please try to concentrate on the present. What are you doing NOW? Anyway, are you seeing a therapist certified in OCD/ERP? They can be a world of help to you. I was in really bad shape until I found NOCD.

PRIV8

Date posted: 2y

Yes im seeing a therapist. Im having difficulties trying to stay in the present moment and not give attention to anxiety or the thoughts. I tried it now and i just felt like i intentionally went back to anxiety and to think the thoughts, like i dont want to let go of anxiety, like im enjoying it and idk why, what can i do, i try to understand why i do t want to let it go

Steven55!

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

I used to do the same thing, try to figure out why, and I always came out on the losing end. I began seeing significant improvement when I finally just shrugged my shoulders and said, "beats the hell out of me. It's all OCD." That epiphany was very important to me. Just keep seeing your therapist and keep working the ERP program. You'll get there. and

PRIV8

Date posted: 2y

So the feeling that i dont want to let go of anxiety and worrying is still an obsession?

Andi 🤓☝️

Date posted: 22w

Triggered from NOCD article

Guys for the past couple of hours ive been spiraling! I wad researching and came across this harm ocd article question that has been worrying me. The title was "im scared of hurting someone when I'm mad. Can i trust myself?" And I was thinking "hey that's what ive been worried about for the past several months!" I even AVOID being angry. Im scared of it bc I get a lot of thoughts and I'm hyperaware of my hands and feel them tingly! Last time i tensed so hard to stay still as possible bc I was so so nervous from my thoughts and my hand twitched which made me SPIRAL. I never want to cause harm! And i always start crying after an argument bc the thoughts are so so scary! Anyway I got afraid bc the article said "research has shown that people with ocd don't struggle with impulse control- so if you find yourself intensely worried you could do harm based on the intrusive thoughts or urges you have, it's likely something else is going on." THAT SENTENCE HAS LEFT ME WITH A TON OF ANXIETY! Its so bad, my appetite is gone! I'm scared does this mean I don't have ocd and should be seriously concerned?!

laladracu

Date posted: 18w

idk if its harm ocd anymore

I dont know whats going on. I dont know if its OCD anymore. I know it was in the beginning. Ive been through a lot of trauma and had one little scary thought of killing my sister 4 months ago that has blossomed into this giant idea of me being a serial killer and wanting to hurt everyone (I never had any social issues growing up but I have had some trauma). Recently I’ve been having urges to just give in. And my mental images have been horrible and I can’t stop checking if I like them or not. I think I’ve convinced myself I have. This morning I woke up a shaking mess with an urge to unalive my family and when my mom left for work I was alone with my sister and couldnt stop vomiting uncontrollably. I dont know if i’m upset because I cant hurt anyone and I want to, or if I’m scared and just want my old life back. I was an avid horror and gore lover and now I’m convinced I want to do the things I’ve seen in the movies. Someone please help. I’m ready to check into the psych ward.

Harm OCD

ItWillBeOkay...

Date posted: 12w

Harm OCD

About 2 months ago, I sliced my arm so deep in an attempt to make this all go away.. as there was blood spurting like everywhere my life flashed before my eyes and I could hear my parents laughing in the room beside me. I started screaming for help as my eyes flooded with tears. How could their little girl do that to herself?? I was able to get to the ER and have my arm stitched up.. making my attempt a fail. But I’m so scared. I don’t want to do something like that again. I’ve never seen my parents cry except for then. The fear in their eyes haunts me up to this day. But that’s the only thing that relieves my pain. Can someone help or relate to this ???

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