MaybeOrMaybeNot

Date posted: 2y

SO-OCD

Does anyone ever struggle with the idea of accepting uncertainty? It’s like, is accepting the uncertainty accepting the outcome? And if it’s accepting the outcome, is it saying you actually want those things to happen? The thing is, OCD can attach to anything right? So I could think about murdering my wife or having sex with kids or sex with animals, all really bad things. I wouldn’t want those things to happen. So how do I teach my brain the thoughts are irrelevant and also teach my brain that accepting uncertainty isn’t saying you want it?

blazed

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

Accepting uncertainty is accepting that anything is possible—but that doesn’t mean it’s likely to happen. The best thing to do is to not respond to the intrusive thoughts; acknowledge them, observe them, and continue living your life. The more you fight back, the stronger it becomes.

Ancient-1

Date posted: 2y

I read an article recently that stated that accepting uncertainty doesn't mean there's a 1 out of 2 chance of the things you fear occurring. It could be 1 out of 100, 000 or more... basically that the odds are so low you can disregard it as an imminent threat. It also said to beware "calculating" your low odds, or to fixate on HOW unlikely it is, because it can become a compulsion. You just have to act like you're in full belief that everything will be alright--but to be willing to be wrong. It sounds complicated, but this is how most people function. What they're doing, or enjoying, or whatever is far more REALISTIC and relevant than a deep dark (or obsessive) fear.

blazed

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

@Ancient-1 “You have to act like you’re in full belief that everything will be alright, but to be willing to be wrong” this is a great way to put it! Couldn’t have said it better myself 👏👏

Ancient-1

Date posted: 2y

@blazed (Whoops, re commenting for typo) the article is on madeofmillons' website. If it's allowed on here, I can link it for you.

blazed

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

@Ancient-1 Yes pls, I can’t find it 🥲

Ancient-1

Date posted: 2y

@blazed https://www.madeofmillions.com/articles/mistaken-beliefs-uncertainty-acceptance-ocd There you go! Hope it helps you out!

blazed

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

@Ancient-1 Thank you! ☺️

Lean.Into.it

Date posted: 2y

Accepting uncertainty in my opinion is giving up some level of control… it doesn’t mean you do or don’t want the outcome.

MaybeOrMaybeNot

Date posted: 2y

Even if you have like an overwhelming anxiety/feeling the thoughts are true? How can I give up control?

Lean.Into.it

Date posted: 2y

@Anonymous Such a great question.,, I wish I had a better answer…. Sometimes it’s just accepting that no matter how hard you try, you’re not going to “convince” yourself w that certainty or resolution that your worst fears aren’t true. And then you do your best to go on living your life. Ideally over time you’ll learn that there’s nothing to be afraid of

MaybeOrMaybeNot

Date posted: 2y

I gotcha. I appreciate the help. The last few days have been rough. It’s like a constant nagging from the moment I wake until I go to sleep. I just need to keep pushing

blazed

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

@Anonymous I’ve been there too so I completely understand your pain. I didn’t think I could ever get better, but I did with a lot of time and patience. So you can get there too! It won’t be easy but the bad days won’t last forever 😊

MaybeOrMaybeNot

Date posted: 2y

@blazed Thanks, Blazed!

MaybeOrMaybeNot

Date posted: 2y

Thanks for the insight! That helps a lot!

eugeniodepalo

Date posted: 24w

Double standards for certainty?

Do you ever feel like people without OCD have an easy time just saying “you need to accept uncertainty” only because they’re not subject to the same level of fear and anxiety as an OCD sufferer would? I feel like they don’t really accept uncertainty, they’re just naturally more certain about things. For example, if you ask anyone whether they think their loved ones are real or not, they will never answer with “maybe, but I’ll never know for sure”. They’ll just say “of course they are”. Isn’t that what certainty is? For me, as I’ve been suffering from existential OCD most of my adult life, such a question absolutely terrifies me. The mere thought of my loved ones and the world not being real sends me into a spiral of anxiety and depression and never ending certainty-seeking behavior. I just can’t stand the thought of that horrible scenario being true. How can one accept uncertainty about such a thought, when it completely undermines all my values and beliefs and world view? Can non-OCD sufferers really accept those nighmarish scenarios? Am I misunderstanding what ERP and therapy is about?

Anonymous

Date posted: 18w

Any tips for leaning in to uncertainty

I need tips on how to really accept the uncertainty the ocd causes, even if it feels so bad like I might get in trouble for something , do I wanna be okay with that?

Ih8ocd!

Date posted: 14w

Uncertainty

Hi All, just wondering if anyone here has any tips with dealing with uncertainty? My OCD centres on my being worried that I have committed a crime and can’t remember doing so, I was out last weekend and my mind is telling me I attacked somebody as I got an intrusive thought to do so when passing them in a bar, my therapist says I need to sit with the uncertainty that maybe I did and maybe I didn’t and have to be ok with that But if the answer is yes then how can I be ok with committing a crime and going to jail??, it’s affecting my relationship and I’m going on holiday on Friday and I’m worried it will ruin that, any tips would be greatly appreciated.

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