false memory guilt rocd

anyone ever been confident on what ur doing? and when someone questions it or when ur ocd questions it u feel like u did something bad? for example, during sexual time i stopped bc i was feeling super insecure, my ocd, and my overthinking was bad, i just couldn’t focus. it was wasn’t for any bad reason tho, nothing about cheating or about other people. i have rocd thoughts abt past people during sex but i move past really fast and am able to focus but when im by myself it’s harder to ignore. but anyways my bf asked “did u stop for any bad reason” and i said no, but ever since he asked ive been wondering if i did it for a bad reason:( it feels so real it’s like telling the truth and someone be like are u sure ur not lying and then it triggers ur ocd!!!

Ocd surfer

Date posted: 2y

It wasn’t easy at first. But I even spoke to her about it and that helped me break the fear

ironmike

Date posted: 2y

@Ocd surfer I try to but people really don’t understand OCD well enough which Is a shame so even when you explain it, it could come across as offensive :/ very strange how although you know the symptoms of OCD that when or if it changes topic you all of a sudden forget about the typical symptoms and again believe it as it comes across in your mind. Pretty sure I’ve had similar situations like this before although wasn’t girlfriends but potential future ones, as when dating I get the thought that I’m bored or I’m not enjoying it. Then I end it and I think back that the relationship did have potential, then get thought of like maybe that potential girl was better than my girlfriend now. I must admit this situation above, could also be related to pornography use with the combination of OCD. as It could lead me to become bored of the same woman, because having an extremely sexual past and porn allows you to have a variation of women (as shallow as it sounds), and that becomes your “norm”. Im assuming this is most likely an aspect that’s affecting my relationship right now, but I don’t think I should put much thought into it. Sorry for rambling on…

ironmike

Date posted: 2y

So during sex you’ve had thoughts of other people. I’ve had the same or when I wank I think of others sometimes. It can make me more horny although it also makes me feel bad, I’m not sure if that’s OCD or not. I am diagnosed with ocd but don’t know if it just means I don’t like her that much or it’s due to my extremely fuqboi sexual past, or my ocd. ):

Ocd surfer

Date posted: 2y

@ironmike Been there. Faced that feeling. Wishing you a healthy road to recovery

ironmike

Date posted: 2y

@Ocd surfer So your thinking it’s more ocd? How did you recover? Also the saying grass is greener on the other side seems very relevant in my situation. Once in the relationship all of a sudden feel like doing stuff with others ( I won’t ) but it’s a very strange feeling, makes you overthink your feelings towards GF.

Ocd surfer

Date posted: 2y

@ironmike I think the relationship is the key. I love my wife. She’s the one who has helped me get going with therapy. And OCD always affects things which you care about/ love. So I get over the intrusive thoughts

dee012

Date posted: 2y

@ironmike i have intrusive thoughts about others, and sometimes it gives me a groinal response but most of the time no. it’s easier to move past during sex. during private time with myself it’s hard to not let my mind roam, i don’t wank off to other people i only do it to my boyfriend but when my mind wanders it scares me so much. just because u get off to other thoughts doesn’t mean u don’t love ur gf tho!!! it’s normal to have other thoughts, me and u are different people so just because our experiences our different doesn’t mean ur not attracted to ur gf

dee012

Date posted: 2y

@cs223 but for me, i only want to get off to my bf, so intrusive thoughts about others bother me, but don’t try and find meaning to them, just talk to ur gf about ur ocd and during sexual time focus on her, maybe cut out pornography if that’s an issue for u

ironmike

Date posted: 2y

@cs223 Yeah will definitely cut of pornography, I can sometimes talk to my girlfriend about it but it’s very difficult to explain it in a way that doesn’t sound offensive. I sent her a video of OCD and what it can do to people but not sure if she’s seen it or not :/

🧡🍁🎃

Date posted: 23w

False memory ocd

Hey everyone, I’m still struggling a bit with false memory ocd. Mine revolves around my relationship. There are some things I have remembered that occurred early on in the relationship, whether someone texted me on Snapchat or TikTok etc. and it was old friends of mine from a friend group. In the friend group it was me and about couple guys and girls. I remember there being an instance where one of the guys had messaged me on Snapchat after I had posted something about a tv show or I had posted a picture of me and my mom and they reached out to me saying something and I honestly can’t remember at all what they had said to me but I’m pretty sure i remember I responded with “Lol” or “Thank you” , and I think the reason I’m really struggling right now is that I can’t remember hardly anything about the text at all. And of course, my ocd is trying to convince me that it was either a flirty chat, or something else. I also want to mention that I unadded a lot of people off my snap, mostly guys on TikTok etc after dating my boyfriend because I felt like that was respectful. And even after doing that, my OCD was trying to convince me that I un added them because I was hiding something or I was on adding them because I didn’t want my boyfriend to see that they were on my Snapchat, which was not the case at all. I think I’m just really struggling because I think about past events that have happened in my mind is trying to convince me that something else happened, rather than allowing me to remember what actually went on. I just wanted to come on here and ask if anyone else struggles with something like this because it’s been really bothering me the past couple days and I know I would never do anything to hurt my boyfriend because I love him so much it’s just I freak out constantly, and it bothers me a lot.

Anonnnnnm

Date posted: 23w

Please help (ROCD)!

I have been battling ocd for over a year now and it likes to switch themes. Currently, it’s attacking my relationship with my girlfriend who I’ve been with since I was in high school over 10 years ago. It first began as an intense feeling that I have to leave or break up with her over dumb little things. Then it changed into a lot of guilt for having any thought about another girl. And the worse is feeling this intense guilt for past things I’ve done in the past while in this relationship. We were so young and I was teenager, but I often found myself watching porn, fantasizing about real other people in my life, and getting off to other girls that I may have known. When I was younger I didn’t think it was bad and that it was just a normal teen boy thing, but 10 years later I have so much guilt about it. And yes I’m with the same girl now. We’ve had our ups and downs, but I know I love this girl and I’m ready to propose to her soon. Anyway, these past mistakes I did when I was younger make me feel like a cheater and I can’t stop ruminating about it. I feel like I have to admit every detail and person I’ve ever had a bad thought about. I feel like if I propose to her and don’t tell her everything, that I’m a lair and didn’t give her the full picture. And the other day one of the girls I thought was hot when I was younger, came up in convo and I just went downhill. Now she knows I deal with OCD and she is very supportive, I’ve told her before that I did some bad things, but never all the details. And that’s all my brain keeps telling me to do. I have so much tightness in my chest and just want to be able to breathe again. But everyone says to not admit or it’ll reinforce the cycle, I’m just not sure how everyone else does that. And at the same time, maybe I am a cheater and just simply a bad person. Idk! I never cheated physically or anything like that, but my past mistakes feel like I did. But again I may just be a bad person! Please if anyone has advice or is dealing with similar things, I’d appreciate the help!

Relationship OCD

Anonymous2212

Date posted: 21w

False Memory/ ROCD

I am diagnosed with OCD, ADHD, and mild depression. But my OCD symptoms are so prominent in my daily life where it feels debilitating. It comes in waves, there will be months with very minor symptoms and other times where it comes in random hitting me like a truck making me rethink life. I grew up having intrusive thoughts of all types, and a lot of them sent me over the edge because I couldn’t understand why things of such sort would cross my mind, things that I’m sure to this day that I’m incapable of or would never want to actually do. Yet I find myself in a constant cycle of trying to dig deep in the past and trying to figure out if I ever acted on any of the intrusive thoughts I can remember, yet ofc have no recollection of acting on them because they most likely didn’t happen. However, not having concrete proof of these things makes me not want to see another day sometimes. It is so hard to move into daily basis like this. I’m also in a happy healthy relationship and sometimes I get these thoughts of “what if I’ve done something awful during the relationship (for example, cheat, dishonesty, etc.) and can’t remember?” I know I would never do anything intentionally to harm my relationship and I think that maybe the idea of not having my partner sends me down a rabbit hole to think all these things. This mental fight is getting harder and harder. It feels unbearable. Does anyone have some fruit for thought, relate, or have any tips?

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false memory guilt rocd

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