has anyone else done this as part of ERP? my therapist is having me write down all my compulsions and the thoughts associated with them. so far (since monday) i’ve written 21 different things. i don’t know if that’s a bad sign…
make that 22…
Yes, that’s part of the process. You need to know what you’re dealing with and a lot of the time, that man’s writing it all out and seeing what’s going on in front of you.
But does't that risk becoming a compulsion? I thought that was my main compulsion (addressing and writing down in detail every ocd episode) so I stopped doing that; and since then I feel better cuz I'm not mentally draining myself anymore by writing down triggering events and immerging myself into recalling triggering stuff. I remember that not so long ago I used to write 10 notes a day. Edit: something comical happened: I almost ended up asking for reassurance because I had a fleeing thought that "maybe that is not a proof of a compulsion at all and I'm lying about having ocd". But I recognized that that was another sneaky way ocd was trying to plants doubts in my head in order to restart the circle. Ocd surely works in tricky and unusual ways lol
@Nameless000 If you do it as homework assigned to you by your therapist, then no. How’s that compulsive? A compulsion is doing something to stop or ease anxiety/stress from OCD.
@Nica Ok I understood, maybe I forgot the distinction between exposure and response/compulsion prevention. So if I understood correctly this specific erp homework is meant to be the exposure part of erp. But still, not in this op's specific case but generally, if addressing something stems as a necessity to ease the anxiety caused by something triggering, than that is a compulsion right? Maybe my compulsion in this case is not the content which you can benefit from by exposure (if controlled and given as an assignment), but the act of making a note itself. Sorry if I bother you with these questions, but even though I'm diagnosed I don't trust my psychiatrist, and the addressing compulsion for me was like my main proof that I had ocd. Since therapists specialised in erp/ocd treatment are not available (or very little) in the country where I live I've been trying to figure this stuff by myself
@Nameless000 If you’re writing notes to ease or stop the stress/anxiety of OCD, then it’s a compulsion
@Nica Ok I guess so, because everytime I got triggered I would write a note explaining in detail what happened or harm myself and then sleep the whole day to drown the pain. All these things helped decreasing my anxiety because my reasoning was that "by writing notes or punishing myself I was holding myself accountable and not just go on with the day as nothing happened". But I'm not doing all these things anymore. Now I just ignore completely and avoid addressing anything, and currently I'm doing better and I'm less stressed. I unconsciously think in absolutes "Either I address everything or nothing at all". I wonder if avoiding addressing at all might be a compulsion. This is just me reflecting to understand my brain more, don't feel obliged to answer or anything. Thx for your time
@Nameless000 The next time your OCD wants you to write a note,don’t write a note. Or pick up a pen and paper, then put it back down again and walk away. Both are great personal ERPs.
@Nica thanks
@Nameless000 You’re welcome ☺️
I haven't done but I've heard of it!
should i be doing erp instead of repeating again and again "none of that shits real. none of that shits real. none of that shits real" ? i can’t tell if it makes it better or not
I'm thinking of trying some ERP on my own while I wait for treatment, but I'm having some trouble knowing what is a compulsion and what would be good exposure. For example, I have huge fears of being a narcissist and/or a generally bad person. So whenever I watch a movie or read something that has an evil character in it I automatically compare myself to that character and stress over if I'm like that person. A couple of things I do when this happens is Google other people's experiences, seek reassurance, rumination, etc. Sometimes I'll also google different symptoms of narcissism, freak out over things that I relate to, then get relief over things I don't. So my confusion is, would researching people who have narcissism be an exposure, or a compulsion since it's something I sometimes do during a spiral? Or, would the exposure be watching movies/living life hearing these stories, and refraining from the spiral of rumination and no Googling at all?
If your mind purposely keeps fetching a repetitive word, and you’re afraid it will never go away, is the ERP therapy to STOP the mind from doing it? Or ALLOW the mind to do it, and not react? Also, is repeating a word in your head a mental compulsion? Or would that be the obsession? So then what’s the compulsion? Posting on here? Lol
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