Mixing up God and OCD

My brain always tells me I need to break up with my boyfriend in order to live out Gods will for my life. The thoughts in my head tell me that they are God talking and then I get confused between my thoughts and Gods voice. It is like I have to choose between God and my boyfriend. However that contradicts Gods word. God does not do ultimatums and He wants us to love like Jesus. I know I serve a good and loving God and He works for me, not against me. However, my brain seems to paint a picture of Him as ONLY a judge and if I don’t do what my thoughts say, ultimately He will just abandon me and I won’t live for His glory like I DESIRE to. Everything I try to do to get these thoughts to go away is only temporary and I don’t know how to make them stop or if they are God or my mind. Back story: I was recently saved in January of this year. I have become born again through Christ. Before that, I took Gods word on account some of the time but looked at it more like a suggestion rather than the way, the truth, and the life. I feel like I always need to be in control and not knowing exactly how my boyfriends heart with God is, is extremely uncomfortable for my OCD. I know I have to remember that I once was lost too, so I have no reason to think God won’t change his heart like He has changed mine. He is also a Christian but has had events go on in his life that has made him fall away. He still loves God and is a strong believer but not how he used to be. I see TikTok’s and instagram posts of Christians that say that a man of God won’t do this or that, or you will know if this man is sent by God. But how do I really know? However, I am not to judge. God is the only one that truly knows the hearts of His children but my OCD can’t seem to handle that. I experience many thoughts that I need to break up with him because he may not be on the same page as me quite yet. However, I can’t decipher whether that is my OCD or God because these thoughts repeat over and over in my mind until I feel like I can’t take it anymore. I get so confused and feel like the only way to stop them is just to listen and do what they say but then I feel I would be obeying my fear and not God. I do believe it is OCD but my thoughts continue to make me doubt the truth.

anthonycaronna

Date posted: 2y

I have this same problem saying about how OCD and God get mixed up together and it’s horrifying. I have bad scruples as well. God wants you to be happy and healthy. If you feel that this boy is for you, than go for it. Honestly, don’t listen to what people say that a Christian won’t do this or that or God is going to do this or that. Not that they don’t have good intentions, it’s just that they don’t know how God is, so I find bizarre that they would what God would do. No one, and I mean absolutely no one knows how God is or works, I don’t care how religious you are. I’m happy that you made God’s word become a part of your life. He’s definitely going to help you in the long one. God nots going to force you to be with anyone, that’s up to you. I’ve had the same feeling about a lot of things as well. God wants you to be happy. If being with him makes you happy, then it makes God happy. You're not the only one going through this, I know the struggle. We are in this together and give grace to God every day. Just know God is loving and he wants you to be happy. God bless🙏

ellij

Date posted: 2y

@anthonycaronna Thank you so much, you’re right! God does want His children to live in the light, not the darkness! God bless you as well!

Nicoleisdoin...

Date posted: 2y

Wow this is so relatable it’s actually a bit scary… please know you aren’t alone. I wish I had advice but this is also similar to my struggles and I haven’t figured it out.

anthonycaronna

Date posted: 2y

@Nicole155 It’s ok I’m here for you. I would give you a hug but I can’t obviously lol. Here’s a tip, if the voice comforts you, makes you feel peaceful, calm and happy then it’s God. If it makes you feel anxious, scared, nervous, or confused than it’s not him

Nicoleisdoin...

Date posted: 2y

@anthonycaronna Thank you so much! I’d love a hug 😂 it’s just such a frustrating feeling to not be able to enjoy a healthy Godly relationship with someone I love and can see myself marrying.

ellij

Date posted: 2y

@Nicole155 Yes! This! It’s so comforting to know others go through the same thing yet sad. I’m sorry you feel this way as well. It’s hard but we have God on our side!🤍

Sunshine&flo...

Date posted: 2y

Has your bf asked Christ into his life like you? The most important thing to consider as a born again believer is that you are both saved. The Bible does teach this. If he is saved, then he may just need to grow more spiritually. Do you attend church together? Or do any Bible studies together?

ellij

Date posted: 2y

@Sunshineflowers7 Yes, he has invited God into his heart and we have recently started going to church and worship services together. I do believe he is saved but I just can’t get the OCD thoughts to stop.

anthonycaronna

Date posted: 2y

@ellij As long as you believe and love Jesus you are saved. Just keep God onto your mind. I talk and have conversations with God every night. There have been times I’ve been crying hysterically in my room. When I speak to him, it’s such a calm soothing voice, he calms me down completely. Like better than anyone else would. Would go from crying my eyes out to smiling and believing, that’s the power of God right there. There would be times where I would get voices and I would get super anxious and sometimes even have a panic attack. God would never scare you or tell you something and you would feel anxious or scared. When God talks to you, you get a sense of comfort like you have never have before. I posted a photo of what God’s voice would tell you. Whenever you get anxious or confused, it’s not from God I promise. You can even ask God to clarify what he means as well. I learned this after many attempts. That’s how I learned God speaks to me, a calm soothing relaxing voice in my mind encouraging me to get up and get going

ellij

Date posted: 2y

@anthonycaronna You have helped give me so much clarity. I don’t know you but I am so blessed to have heard from you. I believe God has used you to help others in hearing him. Thank you so much.

anthonycaronna

Date posted: 2y

@ellij No problem! God bless🙏

cmax20

Date posted: 22w

Religious OCD and romantic relationships

I have grown up in a Christian community and kind of always been around people who believe Christianity or even catholic. In the past few years I’ve really dove deep into my faith and honestly felt good about myself sometimes but overall terrified and like I’m a horrible person if I do one thing wrong or make a wrong sin. I’m also not sure if I completely believe in all the traditional Christian practices anymore. But I’ve been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost 5 months and everything is going great. We communicate and he’s so loving and respectful and I honestly don’t have any major issues In the relationship. I used to have a big fear of men starting when I was like 7 aboit my grandpa or my dad trying to rape me (even though they are good men and showed no real signs of it). But it ruined my relationship with them both for awhile til it eventually went away. I always told myself it was because the “spirit” of ocd was rebuked by Jesus but I honestly don’t know. Now I’m dealing with a more extosential or religious ocd where I’m terrified I’m a horrible person for being in a relationship and almost feel worse about myself if I get closer to God. I also feel like if I get too close to God then I have to choose between Him and my bf and I can’t have both. It’s driving me in San and I feel like if I tell anyone any of this they’ll tell me to just break up with my bf even though there isn’t anything wrong in our relationship. Idk what to do and it’s so draining

Starve_The M...

Date posted: 17w

To my Christian brothers and sisters

Hi I have a question. I love jesus he changed my life and Made me a better person but my ocd loves to confuse me so I have a problem where I remember something in the past and I repented ofc but not it makes me question my intentions and my ocd always puts the are you lying to God card which makes me super scared and then doubt occurs and I'm so exhausted I misinterpret a lot like the voice of God I keep hearing tell the truth and repent now that's it all Good if it were true see ik I'm telling the truth not because of some feeling it's because ocd's version is so ridiculous but It feels soo real I just Want go to God without feeling this fear if I'm lying to him and I fear if somehow I'm wrong. So much anxiety and questions like what if that is gods voice what if I'm wrong pls pray for me and I see videos and I'm scared if that video was sent to me by God telling me to "tell the truth" I say that because my ocd is causing me to doubt the truth being that ocd is wrong

ellij

Date posted: 11w

Gods voice Vs. OCD thoughts

I have been constantly ruminating about if God wants me to be with my boyfriend. I am so hyper fixated on Gods will for my life that I often overthink every move. I have constant “what if” thoughts or “if God wanted him in your life you wouldn’t be having these thoughts”. I can’t differentiate Gods voice with my thoughts. What if this is God speaking? I also keep seeing TikToks that say if God wanted this person in your life they wouldn’t do blah blah blah. I am just not sure what to think anymore. I want to be with my boyfriend and he wants to be with me. However, as of lately we have been having some issues because we show our love differently. Then I see these TikToks saying that the right person will love you the way you need to be loved naturally, nothing will ever need to be forced, rhat I’m forcing a rib into the wrong man, etc. and then I’m like is this God talking through these videos saying I shouldn’t be with my boyfriend? I am not sure what to think. I just feel like my mind is in a constant spiral and I get so confused.

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Mixing up God and OCD

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