- Username
- Ocdsuxs
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Well first when I started going threw it I was scared. my self and my best buddy were on a fishing trip and he had to go pee in the woods and my mind visioned him doing that and my head was like "that's gay YOUR GAY" we were suppose stay in a tent that night and I faked sick and went home. I was afraid to talk about it for the first 3 months I kept it in . Then I went to mom . We talked and went over things . I got the nerve to go see a doctor and he said to see a therapist. I did few appointments and was told I do have ocd . And that this is not uncommon . As for copping... I dont think I cope well when in what I call a "episode " but it comes and goes. I'm getting married in a years time . And when I start thinking about that I get into a slump and start questioning my relationship but from what I understand hocd and rocd can come hand and hand they mingle with each other. Some days my attraction to my wife to be is excellent the bedroom activity can be amazing and perform perfect . You would think that would be enought proff to put it all behind you but it dont work that way . Needs to learn to not care about it just think who cares it doesnt matter who or what I am . I'm human and alive. Live life . And be strong . We can always talk here so keep messaging and we can work threw it togetter
Happythots ! I'm male going threw same thing I'm engaged with two beautiful girls . I know they are all my life and love them . But the idea came in my head 5 years ago and its crippling . My self, I talk about it to my closes friends fiance and parents . I know I dont fit in as gay but that god damn brain wants to make me think I am and bring us down . It knows you care about the though that's why it keeps coming up . I dont vision my self with the same sex all that comes up in my head is "your gay" " yourlieing " I'm 32 started this at 27 even had 2kids in the middle its rough but we need to have a "dont matter attitude " when it dont maternity looses its power .
Sometimes I'd rather be in hell . Fells like I'm letting the family down because it's in my head. My aunts gay and juat got married iv talk about this to her she told me she knew she was gay when she was 7 or 8 it's our brains and its a powerful thing if we let it do what it's doing
I always find my OCD is at its worst in the mornings to.
DSP123! I’m going threw the same thing but with three kids I’m 33 and got these intrusive thoughts! up until 8 weeks ago I was confident, happy and very sure of my identity. How have you coped for 5 years jeez?
Nice one mate I’ve been with my partner for 11 years I love her to death and have 3 sons and I know what your going through it is like living in hell ??
same? i’m 16 and i’m scared because that considered young i guess. but i’ve liked girls ever since i can remember and i don’t want that to change. this is such a nightmare
Dsp123 I think I'm on a similar level to you, I've had hocd for a year now, loved girls for as long as I can remember, never questioned it until a gay guy hit on me while on holiday, telling me I was gay to everyone, I was drunk and at the time I just found the man irritating, of course the next morning I woke up in distress! The next 8 months were hell! I've been with my gf 6 years! Now I hardly have any anxiety over the thoughts, I've had some therapy sessions, I think I've habbitated to the thoughts, the only thing I get is a voice in my head telling me I am gay, I just shrug it off and move on now. I agree with what you said about rocd and hocd, sometimes I feel great with my girlfriend, and at other times It feels a struggle, which is sad to right! The thing that worries me, my attraction hasn't totally come back, it's there, but not like it used to be? Is this similar to you?
Rile20 . Just like me 100% . Even when I know that theres a chance that myself and the woman are gonna get intimate I get scared because I worrie that these thoughts will interfere and be like "proof" sometimes try to advoid it but shouldn't. My head even tells me I'm loosing an erection while doing it but woman says not at all. Guess it's the anxiety doing that. The brain is too powerful .
I know, I get the same, I could be half way through oral or sex, and my mind will ask me if I'm enjoying it? I don't know it's weird! I'm 28, so started the same age as it did you, is your attraction to the opposite gender any different? Or does it come in waves? I mean I feel hardly any anxiety now, I guess I get moments of anxiety, I tell my self that if I don't have anxiety, surely I should be back to normal?
I have no idea if this is just OCD and I’m actually just straight or i was in denial my whole life. Now it feels so scary, i feel like im realizing my true self, that ive always been gay, that im just using SO-OCD as a cover up. IT FEELS SO REAL. I even feel like others with SO-OCD dont experience this feeling and i must experience something different. Its literally a feeling like an urge to admit myself that I’m gay and it even feels like i know im gay and i was using OCD as a cover up for 6 years. I cant even describe that feeling. When i try to imagine myself with a girl in my mind it makes me feel like i like that thought like i want it😔 It feels all very very real. I think you guys with SOOCD have different feelings and you actually have OCD. I dont want these thoughts. I dont want to be gay, i dont want to feel this. But maybe i was my whole life in denial. 😭😭
I just need to vent. I feel hopeless. When i think about guys i feel anxiety. That’s why im scared that I’m actually experiencing comphet. I dont feel anything for guys. But i also do not want to do anything with girls. But i do get thoughts that im gay. It feels real. It makes me so sad that i feel like this. It feels like i should accept my true identity. I cant anymore. Why does it feel like i know im gay and i just have to come out and admit that I’m gay? 😔 i think no one feels like this. I want to cry. I feel empty.
my brain keeps on trying to convince me I’m gay. Why do I care so much?? I’ve been sure of who I am for all my life, but ever since that thought that I could be something else appeared in my head. It’s ruined me completely, I’ve lost attraction to my preferred gender and overthink everything when talking to the same gender. I know pick about everything I’m feeling and ruminate on the past for evidence. I’ve always saw myself being with a man and having kids with a man. But now I guess my ocd (maybe it’s just denial idk) Is telling me I never wanted that and it was society or whatever. It makes me extremely uncomfy and very anxious. When I think about being gay that doesn’t feel right neither does being straight anymore since this theme. I just want to be normal again I hate this. I feel like I’ll never be in a relationship again ever because of this.
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond