Is ROCD manifested after you have already fell in love with your partner and now ROCD symptoms make you question those feelings, or can ROCD happen at the beginning of a relationship before falling in love?
ROCD is obsessing over any relationship, not just romantic ones.
@sunshine&flowers7 Glad you’re a Christian. I am too
I might have have ROCD and I don't even have a partner. I have ROCD with my family, potential friends, potential partners, and maybe even God if that's possible?
But maybe I don't truly have ROCD, but I might. Mine seem to be a mix of existential, relationship, and religious OCD
I see on your profile that you're a fellow believer of Jesus Christ. Sending God's love your way.
I understand what you are all saying, but if we are talking about a romantic relationship....... ?
I really don't see any reason why it can't start at the same time as a romantic relationship, later, or even before. I can already tell that if I ever end up in a relationship, there are going to be a lot of obsessions in the ROCD field. I see you said "at the beginning of a relationship before falling in love". Can you elaborate what you mean by that please?
@Anonymous Being unsure of your feelings for them.
@Sunshineflowers7 I'm sure most people will say that you will never truly know with 100% certainty if you truly love someone. I'm pretty sure you can have ROCD at any point in a relationship, even in the process of deciding if you will even go out with them or not. Are you questioning if what you think could be ROCD for you might not even be ROCD at all, may I ask?
@Anonymous I seem to exhibit the symptoms of ROCD, but have questioned if I'm just not in love in general. Saying this even triggers me. Funny thing is, he has all the qualities I prayed for in my prayer journal- the important ones at least. I think a part of me was expecting everything to look perfect in my partner and in the relationship. It's the constant worry that maybe there's someone else, or maybe at times I'm forcing it but other times I'm not because there have been times I felt attracted to him.
@Sunshineflowers7 Thank you for your honesty, even when it triggers you. I think I can relate. Wondering if there is "the right person for me." If you want my honest opinion on that, I could tell you, but it would probably trigger you like it does me. I think only you can make that call, if they are the one you should be with. One thing to keep in mind is that, yeah, the relationship won't be "perfect", but Jesus loves all the imperfect people, and He wants us to continue to love our spouses even when we don't always "feel in love", if that makes sense. Pray about it -- that is my top recommendation. I do hope things go well with you both!
@Anonymous But, maybe it would help to keep in mind that the most important relationship you could have is with Jesus :)
It can happen at any time. And it can target whatever or whoever.
I think you said you struggle with ROCD and are engaged? Or is that a different person?
@Sunshineflowers7 That was probably me! Yep, been engaged since October and ROCD is my main theme.
@JazzCrab Did it hit you the day you got engaged?
@Sunshineflowers7 Not really, no. We talked about getting engaged for a few months before it actually happened, and I had some moments where I had doubts that got kinda loud because of ocd, but nothing crazy. It didn’t hit me REALLY hard until a couple months ago.
Can ROCD make your thoughts and feelings feel 100% true or real???? Like I can have a thought or feeling and in that moment it feels real or should it not feel real until the ocd latches onto it?
My trauma has always prevented me from pursuing a romantic relationship, I’ve always been super terrified of pursuing something with someone for just about every reason I could conjure up. Now, I’ve met someone and I’ve tried so, so hard to push away all those anxieties to make it work; but I feel like the more involved I get, I become more scared and I dwell on more things that may be signs that our “relationship” should end. I keep thinking over and over that I’m not good enough for them, I might be their “target,” they’re not right for me, our feelings are not mutual, it couldn’t work out between us, my friends and family would not approve, I’m not ready for it, etc. Recently, I tried to break things off with them because they were too tall for me. I started sobbing because I was scared that I was being and awful person and I had completely screwed everything up between us. I wanna know if this sounds like ROCD ? I always had a hunch that I could have, but I had never gotten far enough into a relationship to find out. Please feel free to ask me any clarifying questions. Right now I’m probably not making much sense haha.
I just got out of a 4 year relationship that ended around the beginning of February. In the beginning of the 4 year relationship I had intrusive thoughts about the way I was behaving around my partner, this went on for a few months not knowing what it was or that it was ROCD. I remember it was bad and did not want to deal with what I was feeling. I defeated it and was ok for the first 3 years after that. But it just made me feel like I wasn’t being my true, authentic , funny self I wanted to be for my partner. It was horrible. Now I’m in a new relationship that has been awesome as far as the beginning goes but now I’m back to that intrusive thought and ROCD. Irs to the point where I feel like I can’t be myself and I’m not happy or excited about anything anymore I’m constantly stressed out thinking about it.
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