Struggling with Just Right OCD and feeling isolated in my experiences.

Just Right OCD has hijacked my life , all my life.

If you can relate, please share, I'm feeling very isolated in this. I feel debilitated by Just Right OCD almost 24/7. I've had this all my life, and it's been very fueled by trauma over time. I don't know how not to do Just Right compulsions, because I've never seen them separate from me, but rather just how I am, how I live. How I do my hair, how I eat, how I write, is with Just Right OCD right up on in there. I've never not had this: I ONLY KNOW LIFE WITH IT, SUCKING UP MY TIME. Between this and executive dysfunction from other disorders, I've only really lived my life to 10% of my potential. It's not like "oh hey this is a new theme external to my identity". It's very isolating, even in this community.

Username: strongadultstrongadult

Date posted: 1y ago

I get how you’re feeling man. I’m really stressed out because I’m gonna be going to college for the first time ever in 2 days and I’ll be away from my parents for the first long period of time. I’m horrified but I’m more horrified of having to go to school with OCD and not knowing if I’ll be able to do it. My OCD has been especially hard this summer and it feels like it will never end. My ocd makes it really challenging for me to have confidence in basic and obvious things about myself which is really hard because it feels like the identities that are important to me are fake or not real. Each time it seems like I’ve taken a step forward, I take two steps back. The continuous ocd cycles make me question what the point of living is sometimes if it’s just gonna repeat itself (but not in a suicidal way). What keeps me going is knowing how many people I can help and inspire by just getting through each day who will be going through the things I’m going through right now, in the future. Sometimes all you need is to know that someone else did it. And one thing I’ve learned in my very short life so far is how helping others is one of the most important and fulfilling things you can do. What tends to work for my ocd is exercising as hard as I can when I feel like I’m getting to a breaking point, reading a self help book, watching a motivational/ inspirational video, getting on my knees and praying, ranting it out to someone I know and trust, and intentional distraction (doing something completely unrelated to my ocd where I have to be focused enough to the point where I’m distracted). Even with strategies, I understand the road can be a long, windy, seemingly never ending up hill battle. But remember that your current situation is not your final destination. This is not the end for you. Worst case scenario, you can still live an incredible life where you contribute positively to the world and where you serve others well, even at the level of where your OCD is right now. Nothing can stop you, you are unbreakable. At the very least, I want you to know that your post helped me to know that I’m not alone today and that there are incredible people with unbelievable strength on this journey with me. all the best ✌️

Username: FJustRightOCDFJustRightOCD

Date posted: 1y ago

"What keeps me going is knowing how many people I can help and inspire by just getting through each day who will be going through the things I’m going through right now, in the future. Sometimes all you need is to know that someone else did it. And one thing I’ve learned in my very short life so far is how helping others is one of the most important and fulfilling things you can do. " That is so powerful StrongAdult! Honestly with the wisdom you got, I'm impressed that you're only just about to start college. You have a lot of insight about your struggle but even more so to your deeper purpose, and compassionately ... and even though I don't know you, just from those 2 things I feel confident in your ability to get through college even amidst your struggles, and even if you're away from your family ... because you'll probably be a great pillar of support not just for other people but yourself. Just as I'll keep your awesome advice in mind, I hope you'll keep this observation of mine in mine if ever you have a tough time when you move away. I've been through the college experience, and one thing that helped back then with Just Right OCD a little bit was doing some of my work at the library or a cafe instead of in my room. Good luck you got this, thank you so much.

Username: Meggiemeggles0783Meggiemeggle...

Date posted: 1y ago

I’m so sorry! I struggle with so many ocds & one stuck for me is I have to do abc just the right way. Even when it comes to picking a movie when my friend & I watch them over the phone. I feel I need to pick the one movie we’re supposed to be watching. I add more stuff on when I need to break things down because I feel I can do this & handle it all! I also feel the woulda, coulda, & shoulda when a day is close to ending as if I missed an opportunity & was supposed to do something the just right way. It all drives me crazy but I take day by day. I feel alone often with my ocd but when I go to my ocd group in person & on video is a short time I don’t as alone. Sending you a virtual hug! Hope you are able to do something you enjoy & be kind to you! All ocd folks are warriors! When my obsessions, compulsions etc take over I journal. It helps a little, put meditation music on or do something that distracts the thoughts. Hope you find a support system where you don’t always have to feel so alone.

Username: FJustRightOCDFJustRightOCD

Date posted: 1y ago

This is one of the nicest comments .. ever. TYSVM I will keep coming back to it as a source of support and I wish you the best too and you are not alone. Someone so kind and supportive like you really deserves all the best.

Username: longdays1234longdays1234

Date posted: 1y ago

Hello this is the first post I have seen about just right ocd. I often try and explain to people that some of my compulsions are because of intrusive thoughts but then some are just because of a urge. Then when I’m doing then most of the time I find myself stuck and unable to move trying to find the right time to walk away. It’s got so much worse over the last few weeks but mine also effects the way I eat. Drink. Sleep. Walk in and out of door ways. Correcting touch it’s literally never ending. All day. Every minute. I also don’t know how to start trying to help myself with it. It’s not so much a intrusive thought if it doesn’t feel just right it’s more I fear the feeling it gives me when I know it didn’t feel just right and I try to walk away. I know exactly how this feels it’s slowly draining me.

Username: FJustRightOCDFJustRightOCD

Date posted: 1y ago

Hey LongDays, thank you for sharing that so vulnerably, it makes me feel so much less alone, but I'm also really sad you also "find myself stuck and unable to move trying to find the right time to walk away". Yes. This exactly. Thanks for distinguishing how the difference with this is that it's an urge more than acting on an intrusive though. Sometimes my urges come from intrusive thoughts like "what if this isn't good enough", but it's so much more of an urge that's hard to physically peel away from. Are you in ERP therapy?

Username: longdays1234longdays1234

Date posted: 1y ago

@FJustRightOCD Hello. No I’m not in any therapy as therapy in England is really hard to come across. I just always hear people saying ignore the intrusive thought…. I do have intrusive thoughts with other things but my just right ocd is more of a feeling when I try to walk away and I often find myself stuck doing compulsions which takes up so many hours of my day. Are you therapy? It’s so hard to explain isn’t it. The more I can’t peel myself away the more anxious I become then the more strong the urge becomes and I can’t finish it on a number that I don’t like. But this is how I walk through doorways. Eat. Drink. Touch things. If I bang a elbow etc it’s just never ending. I don’t even know where to start with just right ocd there isn’t much information about it anywhere.

Username: Meggiemeggles0783Meggiemeggle...

Date posted: 1y ago

Aww wow! Thanks so much for your kindness & support! That means so much! We both deserve the best! It’s such a war with the mind! Yes there is kindness & support here. I go on here when my ocd is going going often.

Username: ilohuiojh

Date posted: 5y ago

I’m confused. I don’t know how this is supposed to work. Can anyone relate to this??? I don’t have anyone who understands just what my ocd is. I barely understand it. No matter what I do and where, my thoughts hit me. I can be blinking the wrong way and I have to blink until it feels right.. same for swallowing, touching things, light switches and setting down cups. I have to sit and stand up multiple times until it feels right. Step on certain things like cracks in sidewalk as many times I feel is needed. Wash my hands multiple times. Even when texting, I can type out a whole paragraph and my mind tells me to delete it all and start again because it’s not right. When something isn’t right my mind tells me that someone I love is going to die or get hurt. And for some reason I obsess over certain days, like a day someone I love it born. I will sit there and flip a light switch with that date in my mind and a bad thought that something will happen and I can’t stop until I feel that person in my head is safe and everything is fine. In a way I feel that I am saving them and myself from something bad. Can anyone relate? And maybe share how you’re dealing with it all? Please and thank you.

Perfectionism OCD

Username: KimberlyJean

Date posted: 3y ago

Hey, I'm brand new here. I've been in therapy before for OCD and anxiety however my therapist seemed to get upset with me and my roadblocks. He did not seem to understand "just right" subtype and kept asking me questions to which I had no answers for because it simply did not apply. It was also extremely difficult to do exposure therapy because my OCD is embedded in daily routine and tasks. Having someone dump dirt on my floor was not going to elicit a flare because the interaction had been planned that day. I was blamed for not wanting to get better. I need someone that understands that "my rules" for how I live my life are in place simply because I do not know how to live without them - without I feel out of control and chaos and my brain just gets stuck for reasons I dont even understand but it's extremely discomforting and debilitating. Theres very little fear-base (ie: Im afraid I dont have my 3 cups of coffee, I will fall asleep spontaneously or If I dont check the curtains 3 times, the sun will burn a hole in my floor and set my house on fire) and more so rooted in a "just right" feeling which has ties to moralistic, perfectionistic, and affects relationships. It's more I check the curtains because it just doesnt feel right - or how do I know they are positioned "just right" if I dont? I religiously use my turn signal even when turning in and out of my own driveway because that's RIGHT. Sometimes it's a law that dictates it or moral code and other times for more Neutral things I've set my own "laws" in order to navigate the "gray" areas that I do realize are not normal or needed. However if I do not follow them or am unable to (ie: it's time to vaccum and my vaccum breaks), I shut down/meltdown and intensely feel anxiety and discomfort that's nearly unexplainable. I know logically if my vaccum is broken I can clean my refrigerator out instead or move onto another task but OCD illicits such strong anxiety and discomfort that it send my brain into crash mode. I know it's ridiculous but I cannot move on until the vaccum is fixed and I can continue the ORDER of routine. If it takes along time for the vaccum to be repaired, I might feel as if I have to "start all over again" instead of picking up where I left off...which is again, time consuming loop that causes very little accomplishments and things that do not have to be re-cleaned again to be re-cleaned in the specific order of my routine. I do hang onto items longer than needed and have a fear - based lack of spending I've been trying to work through. I have plans to purge my closets soon of clothing I've hung onto for over 10 years, but it sometimes is to the point where it affects my self care (Ie: I refuse to buy myself underwear because I am afraid to spend money even though my underwear is holey and barely held together. I cannot "afford" to buy food because what if I need the money for a bill?") - this has been easier to identify and work through but I'm still recovering. I also obsess over the past concerning familial childhood relationships have an abandonment root for me. I repeat myself verbally and written word when upset or when communicating with people and they often get annoyed - I believe it's because I never felt understood, valued or heard and I want to make certain they understand me clearly. When everything else falls apart I dive into answers online, medical, self help, history and stories....I look up facts, cases, ect ect and because theres always facts to learn it helps quench the extreme need for "just so" answers. But I tend to get lost and lose track of time. BUT "just so" root type has been extremely difficult to treat and function with. I end up feeling like I'm failing, I hold guilt for not being able to take care of my family and things "normal" people can handle or accomplish. I'm frustrated with myself but I also know my family is frustrated with me. I get irritable and shut down and can accomplish anything when I get roadblocked...its like my brain cannot compute how to navigate without the exact order and routine. My inners feel like a 3 year old is temper tantruming uncontrollably inside of me and its extremely distressing. I want help. I just need to know I'm not alone and I'm in the right place with people who understand the subtypes and MY specific OCD. I cannot go through getting blamed again for not trying hard enough by a therapist when I am fighting with everything I am every day and I am exhausted. I'm here now because my quality of life has been greatly diminished amidst transitions in life right now and change in familial dynamic that's prevented my normal routine and sent me into chaos. It's going on 4 months and I thought I could navigate it with time, but it's not gotten any better and I need help to get my life back on track on way or another. Thank you for getting this far if you have. Advice, comments, thoughts welcome.

Perfectionism OCD

Username: MyLifeIsOCD

Date posted: 1y ago

OCD 24/7 for years

For 13 years, OCD is not just a part of my life; OCD IS my life. I cant work, Im having intrusions all day, anxiety all day, afraid of my own mind, it even caused me chronic fatigue syndrom because I did only sleep a couple of hours for years because of the compulsions I did on repeat every awake hour of every single day, no pause, not even for 5 minutes. Ive had a couple of months where it was better, like I was able to live life a little more and not being tortured 24/7. Sometimes I feel like Im the only one with OCD for so long and the only one on whom OCD has such a big impact... 😔

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond

Struggling with Just Right OCD and feeling isolated in my experiences.

Related posts

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Be a part of the largest OCD Community