QUESTION

No, just You being so distressed and bothered by these thoughts, says 110% that you do not like them and they go against your values, I have been going through this same bs with this disorder for nearly 15 yrs and it will throw any and every nasty trick in the book at you, and all the little feelings you are feeling is because you are hyperfocused on what you fear the most and believe you me your mind is a powerful and creative computer that can come up with any sensation, thought, feeling, etc, and You definitely Love Your family, you wouldn't be freaking out about it, dealing with this disorder for a while will put You in a numbing phase, where you maybe don't have the emotions that you once had, it's our bodies protective mechanism because we are so distressed, whenever you get those thoughts feeling emotions, simply redirect your focus onto what important to You, don't let this order mess with You, I can tell by this whole message that You are a great person, hope this helps, and I'm here if you have any other questions.

Yes. Imagine you're sitting on a river bank watching the water flow calmly past. See your thoughts as an object floating on top of the water. You see it approaching from the distance. You can't stop it from coming, it's out of your control. As it gets closer, what can you do?

You can jump in to fight it, but you may get swept under and drown, you can turn your head, but you'll always be wondering where it is, when's it going to get you, how soon till it does. Or...you can just calmly watch it go by. In which case as it does and eventually goes out of site, you'll still be the same, wonderful, loving person you've always been. 🙂

I feel like I wrote this myself! I am going through the se exact thing. Mine is directed at my partner. I love him so much and it has been KILLING me thinking all these nasty thoughts. I’ve been struggled for months now. My worst nightmare is something ever happening to him, but my brain says “I think you want to stab him in the throat!” It’s ridiculous. What funny to me is stabbing in the throat is specifically what grosses me out in movies/tv shows, yet that’s what my brain picked to try and make me believe I would want to act on. We will be okay, stay strong!❤️

Typical harm OCD thoughts. I have struggled with the same theme. It feels like your thoughts are being made up by you, but this is not true. You probably started out with a single thought and that freaked you out. Then you started worrying about it and that made your brain throw more of these images your way because it wants you to fix the issue (your distress). What helped me was realizing that people with OCD also have intrusive thoughts. I have heard the “standing in the kitchen with a knife and then thinking about stabbing others who are around” many times from people without OCD whenever I shared what intrusive thoughts in OCD can be. They’re all like “I HAD THAT ONE TIME!” - this sounds weird but these thoughts every now and then are normal. But people without OCD are not bothered by them. They think “huh that was weird” and go about their day. But people with OCD will freak out at these thoughts and that will multiply them. As for why intrusive thoughts happen. I personally feel like sometimes your brain registers a danger. (Like a kitchen knife. Brain knows it’s “sharp” and that you should be “careful” with it) And then it links that alert to the things you want to protect, like your family or your own health. It’s a really strange protection mechanism in your brain which is being amplified by your OCD. The reason the thoughts won’t leave you alone is because they make you afraid. As soon as you will no longer be afraid, the thoughts will stop. You will sometimes have intrusive thoughts because everyone does. But they won’t scare you. You can overcome this. I can actively think of these upsetting images now and they don’t bother me at all. Because I know they’re thoughts and not reality. The numbness you feel is because you’re probably too consumed with fear and focusing too much on keeping a check on yourself. OCD puts a huge strain on your emotions and it can make you feel your other feelings less. I have experienced this as well. It will come back once your OCD has lessened.

Hey, I know this was a long time ago, but did you ever get through this? Currently in the SAME boat right now and struggling so hard.

Let the thoughts sit there, allow them to, allow the uneasiness and uncertainty, don't react to fix anything. It'll pass, I promise.

Yep, I've had the fear of just about any object you can think of ad a weapon, it will throw just about anything you can think of at you, don't go for the bait, OCD is a liar!!!

I am even afraid now that I typed this because what of I jinx it..