Some motivation plz

I am not able to get help as of now...

@Someone99 Unwanted thoughts that makes me anxious and to stop it I do compulsions most are mental compulsions while in physical is I try to touch/beat myself a little to stop the flow of thoughts...

@Someone99 Idk I am confused now...it's changing the shape...now these thoughts are actually ruining my memories...it's keep taking me back in the day and trying to make me panic by changing the context or whatsoever...it was not like that before...it's started few fays ago and i think just now while writing it I have realized it...

@Someone99 Now it does start with these...before it was imaginations...maybe my brain is playing with me...or maybe...u know how it is...we always remain confused...struggling to know what it is...why it is...all those things...and yes plz I need suggestions if you can

True that...but I am not finding that how should I start to think that could make me come out of this guilt and shame and could stop making me anxious...and yes it stems from my religion

@Someone99 Yes almost same...

@Someone99 That's the problem I haven't did anything for real...it's all in thoughts...and just that thoughts which are not in my control is creating this mess...ukw I don't remember my last year correctly when I feel I was in better state but why and how no matter how much I try to remember I don't get why I was better at that time and why I am in distress now

@Someone99 Sure

@Someone99 Yes i watch youtube as well as messaging app but I am not comfortable in sharing my identity here

@Someone99 Thankyou

@Someone99 Yes I completed it just now...feeling better, seen, empowered...but all I need to do is to continue this and should not again go to the same path...but seriously thankyou so much you are making time from your life and helping me