I’ve lost my interest in men. I’ve been telling myself what if I’m gay for over a year now and I feel like I’m gay now. I feel like my biggest worry is coming out now. In my religion and culture it’s wrong and I don’t want it. It all started as a movie scene last year. I’ve accepted it I’ve given up. I feel like I’ve been in denial the past a year. I’m on tinder looking at girls now cause I don’t know anymore. Now I can’t seem to find someone I’m interested in I can’t see myself kissing a girl or sleeping with one. I just truly believe I’m gay and I have to call my mom and come out. I want to cry. I’m nervous idk what’s real. Am I gay? Or is this ocd? Am I bi? Should I come out? Was my life a lie? Am I in denial cause it’s unacceptable? Will my parents love me? If I’m worried about them then it’s cause I’m in denial right? Ugh I want to die.

I feel so bad ! I feel you 100% I can just feel your pain! You’re not alone!! We have all felt like this. I had several meltdowns today over this! It’s the worst feeling. I also felt like just telling my mom everything and coming out because I really did believe it but I didn’t. I got over it. You’ll be okay. You will soon realize that you aren’t what that your thoughts say you are or make you think you are. Just breathe you’ll be okay I promise. I talked to a sibling and it made me feel so much better. Find someone to talk to ! Try and understand that this is how these thoughts are. I promise you. Just breathe.

Friend, I know how you may be feeling. Before being a trans person I was a gay man. I'm not saying this to provide reassurance for you,but I'm saying it because I feel your ocd is causing you to over think this and further analyze it. There are people who accepted it, but it doesn't relieve any of the problems. It still freaks you out. That's why ERP exists. My ocd had done this to be before multiple times. Please stay strong and stay safe. Understand that this is the belly of the beast but you can get your way out of it.

You will get out

I have no interest in men because they're stupid and shallow ? I always wonder if it's my OCD though that strengthens that feeling in me. Or maybe it's 90 Day Fiance. Either way I don't feel like I'm missing out.