I feel like everyone says “OCD is a bully and a liar, don’t believe it,” but in therapy they encourage you to accept that the thoughts could be real and to live with that discomfort. I feel like these ideas are somewhat opposites. It’s made ERP really difficult for me because my mind is at a tug of war- “do I shrug off these thoughts and move on or do I accept they could be real and lean into that discomfort?”
Depends on what the therapist’s strategy comes from. They either go with the non-responsive method that I also with through for most of it until I was ready to take things more of a troll-ish way in recovery, or another method of engaging with OCD by personifying it like a bully and therefore, don’t listen to a bully because it’s wrong.
@Nica It’s hard because I think, well I’m not living with uncertainty and doing treatment right if I accept my OCD is a bully and the thoughts are junk. That’s me accepting with certainty that the thoughts aren’t true—still not uncertainty.
And you can absolutely say that OCD is a liar and still accept uncertainty. For example, sure, there is a chance that you’re going to get hit by a car if you cross the street… but you do everything in your power to not get hit by a car. However, there is that possibility—that uncertainty—because you can’t control other people’s crappy life choices and bad driving. But that doesn’t mean you don’t cross the street and live your life. If you need to cross the street and your OCD says not to, you need to cross the street.
You have to accept the uncertainty but not the idea ! I know it seems weird but keep saying "maybe maybe not" "I don’t need to know that rn" accept that yes it can be just OCD or maybe it’s true but rn you’re not capable of finding an answer cause if you try you’ll just fall in that rabbit hole of compulsion and rumination again ! Hope you’re okay !
@LaloCD6 Me therapist tell me that all the time: “you don’t need to know right now” and it’s so frustrating!!! It makes me feel like I’m just tabeling my theme until I inevitably find out it’s true. It’s so OCD. I know the panic of “needing to know” is the OCD but it’s really hard for me when it latches onto my recovery.
I totally get what you’re saying. When I come on here to get some comfort, the advice sometimes conflicts with what my therapist says. It’s really difficult!
Because I have stumbled on this, I think my mind keeps getting stuck. A different approach, perhaps a more gentle modality, is ICBT. Therapist that use this modality state that having someone accept that they may be or may not be a x,y, z is not necessary. Instead, they said that we can operate from a state of certainty that we are not our ocd theme. What is wrong with our brain is the way it infers information. If erp is too my for you, maybe search icbt
Accepting uncertainty feels like I'm accepting my intrusive thoughts (that I know are false) as truth. Does anyone else deal with this thought and have any tips to avoid thinking this? (I know it's my OCD telling me this so I can continue ruminating and "proving intrusive thoughts wrong", but it's a thought that makes me feel like ERP will make things worse)
Constantly struggle with the battle between saying ‘thoughts are just thoughts and OCD thoughts are ego-dystonic so you know they don’t represent who you are’ and the acceptance route of ‘it’s just a thought, maybe it means something, maybe it doesn’t me - in my mind I’m like ‘well if it maybe means something then how can it be ego dystonic?’ - I really need help getting my mindfulness together!
Where I'm getting stuck is that there are two approaches in therapy. And the two contradict each other. 1. Experience the intrusive thought, don't do the compulsion. 2. Do an exposure. I don't believe I can move forward because the two contradict each other. I don't understand how people go through ERP and come out feeling better from OCD. I don't get it. I'm trying to do both #1 and #2, but the two just clash. What am I doing incorrectly?
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