- Date posted
- 1y
OCD or genuine concern?
My boyfriend of five years has a female friend he’s known longer than me and they’ve had a history of feelings for each other. Two years ago she told him she liked him and that confused our relationship but he stayed with me, but then for basically a year from then he was pretty much emotionally cheating on me until last summer when we ended up breaking up. While this break up ended up being temporary and we got back together and have been more committed to each other, during the time we were apart he spent much more time with her and they kissed. He said that made him realise it was me he wanted to be with, but it’s really hard for me to get over that. My OCD has latched into this and I definitely obsess about it too much and get intrusive thoughts about them together and stuff, but is it a genuine valid concern to not want him to be friends with her still? He doesn’t see her in person because she’s at uni far away and when she is back home near ish to him and asks to do stuff he’s said no because of how much everything with her has hurt me, but I know that they message fairly frequently and she confides in him about stuff in her life. It makes me feel so anxious and scared that everything that happened before will happen again, and it’s really hard to trust him when he says it won’t happen again because he said that about what happened two years ago and then last year it happened again. But I really don’t know if it’s my OCD or something I’m valid in being worried about.