Anyone else see that post about the gurl who's so-ocd came true? I'm so worried now that this IS me and I'm just in denial...because my sexual intrusive thoughts showed up before 12 and that's when they say most kids have their sexual awakening etc... I'm scared
Yea i saw it and was really triggered by it to the point i started cry but the best we can do right now is to take some deep breaths and remember that her experience isn’t ours ❤️🩹
@omelette *crying lel
@omelette I want to cry , but I’m holding on as to maybe she’s just convinced by ocd? Idk 🤷🏽♀️ I messaged my therapist right away
@omelette Everyone saw it I’m a guy and I got triggered. Her experience is different to ours ig I got my hocd thoughts at 15 turning 16. I jus hate this is what we have to go through
@Anonymo12 I honestly still don’t think it’s real. I don’t know if it’s compulsive or not but I’m telling myself that I started having these thoughts at 22ish , before then, I never ever questioned! And I had a dream last night with my husband and my ex fighting for me lol, and my husband won my heart. In addition, I’ve had other themes, POCD, HarmOCD , scrupulously, ROCD . I’ts been confirmed by like ten different therapist that I am just having intrusive ocd , I don’t see myself with a woman all as evidence that I am still heterosexual
@68273 Like before I never questioned it and then when it went away for 2 years I was fully into girls. I’m going to delete this app cuz ppl make me feel like it’s real whereas Ik so many ppl who beat this and lived a happy life I hate ppl who put others down
@Anonymo12 You know people who overcame this theme?
@68273 Yup many ppl on this app and on things like Reddit and quora. Also know a Muslim like myself who overcame this and supported me the last 2 days to overcome it.
@Anonymo12 I see, my therapist also told me that there wa some guy she was seeing who was 100 convinced so he didn’t think it was ocd and she tried telling him he needs to do erp but he kept insisting but she had to eventually refer him to where he wanted, a sexual type of therapist or something like that. She said, I know they’ll send him back here
@68273 Exacrly idk why ppl are thinking that ocd is real. Ocd= intrusive thoughts which equal 🟰 unpleasant and unwanted thoughts. That isn’t so hard to understand 🤦🏽♂️🤦🏽♂️
@68273 I was 19 and the same, didn’t question it before then. I currently live with an am engaged to a man. I still struggle with these thoughts more than I would like but it’s riding the wave. We’ve made these thoughts something to be scared of when I’m reality everyone has these thoughts. I’ve always have ROCD and did have POCD.
@TBdiz I was 15 and didn’t quesrion it before that I rememebr 12-13-14 and strt of 15 I was super into girls. Then it went away when I was 16 like 98% it went away and thenall my attraction to girls came back and I was happy until august 2023 where it came back and now it’s making me suffer
@TBdiz I was engaged too, 4 months before the wedding is when this happened
@68273 Oh bless you, I had this theme before meeting my partner so it’s been there on and off throughout our relationship. We broke up for a year (completely unrelated to ocd) and then I spent the whole year we was apart obsessing over the fact I missed him. No we live together and are engaged and it’s reared it’s ugly head again. It’s made me lose attraction to men apart from him. Which should be enough but still doesn’t satisfy OCD does it 😂
@TBdiz I know. We didn’t know it was ocd so we broke up and I was in so much pain, I didn’t understand what was happening
@Anonymo12 How long did it take for the attraction to come back
@68273 Idk I was always attracted to girls at the time but it went low. I remember back then I wasn’t as bad as this time. But I think I’ve read too much into things and I’m getting triggered so much now too. I need to leave this app
@Anonymo12 Do what you think will help you as long as it’s not compulsive, I have left this app in the past because I was using it for reassurance and my therapist told me to stop and delete it but when I get triggered, I come back to it
@68273 I used it as reassurance too. So I think it’s time to delete this app cuz before today I wasn’t as triggered but now I am. I feel low Asf. I hate this so much. I read too much into things this time. I won’t recover😓
@Anonymo12 What Reddit are you part of
@68273 Deleted that too and quora and now I deleted all the girls on snap. This one rlly got to me. I’m scared I dont wanna be gay.
@Anonymo12 Are you a girl ?
@68273 Nah I’m a guy. I felt like I was talking to girls for reassurance. And now it’s scaring me even more. I lost my girlfriend whom I wanted forever and ever. I can’t do this anymore
@Anonymo12 Have you tried erp?
@68273 Left it to uncertainty maybe maybe not and that helped A lot. Until yday and today we Strting erp wherr the person who I’m working with said write down and say it out loud as erp.
@Anonymo12 Ok that’s erp but also, go about your day despite ocd. We have a choice, if you lost someone you cared about due to ocd, use that as fuel to get you better. That’s what I’m telling myself right now. I have avoided my husband so many times because of this monster. I lost someone I loved so much, 4 months before the wedding because of ocd and I regret it so much. By the time I got some help, it was too late. He had moved on. Now, I’m married and my husband tells me he’s done with me avoiding him and there’s been times where he thinks my ocd is real and that’s when I’ve had moments of like what the heck?! I love this man so much, I’m not going to let this destroy our marriage
@68273 Sometimes it fees like I like these thoughts which put me back in a spiral again. Mostly I jus cbs with. It. I jus wanna leave all. This. Behind me. And be happy. I know il be happy when I’m ocd free. I hate this so much. And after today it’s jus gotten so much Worser. I cried and feeling low. EVERYRIME I see. Light another thoight puts me down especially linked w today.
@Anonymo12 I’m there right now, the past two weeks I feel I would like to be gay, like I like the overall idea . I watched tv and I start having thoughts about the woman characters and get a groinal and general sense that I would like it. Worst thing, I’m not getting anxiety about it. That’s why I felt like crap this morning so when I read that post I have a panic attack
@68273 Yh like I don’t feel anxiety but then I got told that is strt of recovering. Because I like girl parts. It doubts wedding too. If I think abt wedding with a girl it tells me, well being with a guy isn’t. Bad choose to be with a guy. Or my past rs. Failed it ll say be w a guy now. I hate it sm. I jus wanna live my life with a girl happily and be attracted to her and romantic
@68273 So I’m struggling with it again at the minute, I love my partner and find him attractive but atm that’s it. I look too deep into attraction nowadays where before it just came naturally if I found people good looking, I found them good looking. If I didn’t I didn’t it wasn’t a big deal until ocd hit. My problem is I imagine myself having sex with people and if I don’t want to have sex with them (which is no one but my fiancé) I freak out it’s weird 😂
I was already feeling awful because I’ve been spending so much time,good time w my husband and it’s been a few days where I had accepted I may be a bisexual , to the point I didn’t experience anxiety but more like I want it. It’s going to be 3 years of same theme combined w my b day and reading this, I just haven’t gotten out of bed
@68273 Ocd is shit man
@Anonymo12 It’s the worst thing. If you can, I recommend working with a therapist or looking at Nathan pettersons youtube videos. There’s one that explains “liking your ocd thoughts “ or something like that
My anxiety has pretty much become non existent thanks to ERP with a Nocd specialist but STILL
@Salt&vinegarchipsss How do you come w that stage though? Like you, I was doing erp w nocd but I get stuck on this phase. Like, I get the thoughts, feelings, arousals etc with no anxiety and makes it seem like I want it. Anxiety is what I think keeps me protected and reassured me and that’s the most I have been able to progress . The thoughts feelings everything is still there 24:7
Yup! I’m spiraling because of that. Today I woke up convinced and this just threw me off. I’m wondering if she’s just convinced because of ocd?
Maybe you’re gay, maybe you’re not. You came this far behaving as whatever you want to identify as, so even if a magical polygraph from the sky confirmed that you like girls, what’re you gonna do about it?
What did you therapist say?
@Anonymous She hasn’t replied, sadly. But I remember asking about this before and I was told, it’s like telling someone with pocd, HarmOCD that their theme se are true. My husband didn’t know about my ocd and how these thoughts are egosyntonic so he told me one day, I think your theme is true. I spiraled and my therapist told him, you should never confirmed someone’s theme to an ocd sufferer w these themes . Why? Because they will spiral and end up doing what I’m doing right now, compulsions
@68273 I think she was confused too. Idk it’s the worst ocd I’ve ever felt. Les hope we can overcome it
Oh my word. I saw a post like the one you are describing on Reddit. I lost my breath. I hadn’t felt like that since before I knew I had OCD. I had to keep reading, and it turns out the guy was using that as a form of ERP for himself?????? Idk still unclear. You are seen and heard and not alone!
Same, mine started around that age too
@Nicolas:) Mine started at 22
@68273 I’m 37
(20f) I have been dealing with severe OCD symptoms for as long as I can remember. I recently got diagnosed about a year ago, and even though I know that these thoughts are probably my ocd, I still cant shake them. Growing up I was always very sexually curious. I was sheltered from a lot of things, as I went to a private school and things like sexuality and sex were never talked about. I remember doing some weird sexual things growing up (never affecting another person), looking up taboo sexual things, etc. I always seemed to become aroused no matter what the situation was, even if I just saw someone getting changed. I have no recollection of being SA'd, so i'm wondering where this all came from? Was I just curious and wanted to experiment and try different things? Or am I really a pervert, pedophile, etc. I have all these thoughts racing through my head and it's killing me. Everything I did as a kid I look back on and am disgusted, as those don't align with my views at all today. I never thought growing up thinking these things were wrong, or actually realize what they were until I got older. I'd like to think it was just my curiosity, but i'm not sure. What if i'm in denial and actually do like these things? I just need to know if theres something wrong w me, I cant keep going on like this. Could really use some advice.
I was checking out a community of adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse, and there was a post that said that pedos sometimes don't even know that they are that, or they don't realize it, like a racist person who won't admit that they're racist. I also saw a comment that mentioned that a ped0 tried to groom them and then when the victim realized, the predator simply said that "they were going to therapy and that their behaviours were a product of childhood abuse" They also said that people like that often did mental gymnastics because they had a personality disorder. This made me feel extremely anxious because, what if that's the case for me? I did things from 10 to 15 years old that made me extremely afraid and shameful, and thinking about the possibility of being that, i didn't abuse or groomed anyone but i saw disturbing things on the internet. Stating the things i did are sometimes accompanied by saying the abuses i experienced as a child, this worries me that it is a gigantic mental gymnastics to evade responsability or to deny being a paraphilic. This is horrible
Idk anymore it feels like being on here is a trigger. Every time I see a minor post on the app, my intrusive thoughts go haywire and then my brain says maybe you should comment something inappropriate and i literally don't wanna fucking do that. It's the last thing I want to do. And now im scared that I commented something crude on someone's post. obviously, when I went to check there was nothing now my brain is saying "you commented and then deleted". I want to think it's something I wouldn't do, but why are the images in my head so real. Children should be safe. I feel like I need to be locked away. Someone please help me.
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