My story

Hi everyone, my name is Alexa and I have OCD. I live in Romania with my parents, they are a little bit older than other parents of kids at my age, if it does matter. I noticed the first symptoms of OCD two years ago. I associate this onset of OCD with my grandfather's illness, which affected me badly. The symptoms were like: • obsessive screenshots at different magical numbers • symmetrical touching of different things (if I touch something with my left hand I MUST do the same with my right hand) • counting during different activities • intrusive thoughts about my existence • or intrusive thoughts followed by compulsive actions (for example: if you don't touch the wall 4 times something bad will happen to your parents) •in the last year, the situation has worsened a bit, and a recent symptom is the fear of contamination (the feeling of germs on the hands after touching an object touched by someone else) At first, I didn't know what are these things, but after some searches, I found that I identify with mosts of OCD symptoms. I told the school psychologist that I might have this problem but was ignored. After this incident, even I chose to ignore my problem. Lately though, I feel like I can't carry all these things anymore. And I want more than ever to heal! I want to get rid of this damn disease once and for all! So, I installed this app with the hope that it will manage to change something in my life. If not, at least I know that I shared all of this with someone, and that I didn't keep it all to myself. Thank you!

Estrid

Date posted: 2y

Also: you can do a lot of work on your own if you learn the basics of OCD. You can for example learn to delay the actions you feel urged to do. Read more here about ERP https://www.treatmyocd.com/what-is-ocd/what-is-erp

painecuzahar

Date posted: 2y

Thank you!

Estrid

Date posted: 2y

Welcome to this community. You are wise and brave I think. You have insight in your condition and you are sharing this here. Sorry to hear about your struggles and I get really upset when hearing about the reaction from the school psychologist😖 I don't know much about Spain and the possibilities for help in your area, but maybe someone else here can help you. You can also contact NOCD through their website and ask, or IOCDF. Is it possible for you to make an appointment with a psychiatrist to get a diagnosis? I hope you will find help and support, and try to learn as much as possible about how OCD works.

painecuzahar

Date posted: 2y

Thank you so much! Besides the school psychologist they are also my classmates, who are bullies. :( One day a girl came and touched my hands insistently, knowing my fear of contamination. She did it on purpose, to upset me. Also, I am from Romania, not Spain. :)

Estrid

Date posted: 2y

@painecuzahar Sorry...I don't know why I wrote Spain... Oh this is so sad😥, anxiety and bullies... Can you talk to your parents? Can you show them OCD website info and describe your problems?

painecuzahar

Date posted: 2y

@Estrid I tried but they said that everything is just in my head and I should control my own mind. They told me that everything depends on me.

Estrid

Date posted: 2y

@painecuzahar Oh no😥😥😥 Anyone else you trust and can talk to? How old are you?

painecuzahar

Date posted: 2y

@Estrid 13. I dont think so ;)

Estrid

Date posted: 2y

@painecuzahar Ok...😥If you write "Romania" in the search tool here maybe you can find someone else in your country with some kind of advice. It sounds like you are avery intelligent 13 year old. Maybe you should visit the psychologist again and show facts about OCD, from IOCDF or somewhere else, you can writedown your symptoms as you have done above. Maybe buy a book about OCD or borrow in a library to get tips on self help. I really hope you'll find help.

painecuzahar

Date posted: 2y

@Estrid Estrid, thank you so much for your support! Your kind words mean so much to me! I am gonna try to apply your advices. You are so kind and lovely. 🙂 I hope you will find help too. ❤️

Estrid

Date posted: 2y

@painecuzahar You are welcome, I feel sad when I hear about your situation, but you are not alone and I believe you will find a way🙏There is hope. And also: you can write to IOCDF and ask for advice! Don't give up!

Estrid

Date posted: 2y

Hi again. I found this, maybe something for you while waiting for therapy: https://cedar.exeter.ac.uk/media/universityofexeter/schoolofpsychology/cedar/documents/liiapt/OCDSelf_Help_Workbook.pdf

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond