Triggered by a true crime case.

Feeling sick to my stomach. Over a year ago I got highly invested in a true crime case. I believe her name was Linsey Clancy? I can’t even look it up because I will spiral. I was over consuming true crime for over two years before that on a consistent basis. I thought I could handle it but once I read this case I think it ruined my life. I couldn’t begin to fathom how a people called her a loving mother but she did what she did to her kids. I couldn’t fathom how people said she was so normal and had kind words for her but she still did that to her kids. Did she just snap? Is that something our bodies can do? Can we be great moms one day and then our bodies take over and we snap and we hurt our kids? Can my body do that? I have a little girl who I can’t even conjure up the right words to express how much she is my world and how I have limitless love for her. She’ll be 4. I don’t even get Loud with her and have not once even spanked her. The thought of anything remotely close to that makes my whole system feel like it’s going to shut down. So much to the point that I have a fear of disciplining her like a mother needs to do. I’ll think is this what happened when Lindsay Clancy you know what her kids? Who would have imagined those kids would be in danger with their own mother? That could never be me…right? I haven’t looked up a thing about it since I had the worst panic attack of my life in March last year. I accidentally scrolled past something on YouTube that was about it. I just read the title. Now I’m in tears begging god that I’ll never be a danger to my own daughter. Im exhausted. I know that will never be who I am to my very core. But Is that what Lindsey Clancy thought too? The mental torture is exhausting 😭😭

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 1y ago

Hey, I was in touch also with a real case and I knew the victim (it was my teacher). I know it is hard to keep with ocd, specificelly when it makes you compare your actions with another person. But remember that you two are different persons that were growing up differentely with other values, in different cities/context/surroundings. You two have different bodies/different way of seeing the things/analyze it, others perspectives. Biologically speaking you two have different brains that work in different ways. You are not this person and that person isn’t you. The fact that you are comparing to her/ over analysing your hole essence as a person only proves that you have ocd. It also shows that you carry for them. Idk if it helped you, I hope you all the best

Username: Cristina1217Cristina1217

Date posted: 1y ago

Omg, I went through a very very bad ocd episode last year after a family death and hearing about this case sent me into a debilitating 6 month spiral where I was unable to be alone with my daughter because I was terrified I would have the same fate as the woman you mention. For the record I have harm and existential ocd. I had this fear I would suddenly lose my mind and hurt my daughter. I can’t believe someone else was also so triggered by this case! I recently saw an article posted about her on Facebook and started to spiral again. I hope you are ok, my therapist did say this case was triggering for so many.

Username: Cristina1217Cristina1217

Date posted: 1y ago

Something that helps me when thinking about this case is that she was on A LOT of medication. She was also post partum. Also we have to remember we only know what counsel is making public to the media, there could be so much more to this story than we know.

Username: KateymmKateymm

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 8w ago

Hi there, I’m struggling with this now. How did you start to feel better about it? I can’t stop thinking that she had harm ocd and just didn’t get the right treatment for it. It’s terrible

Username: Freemeofocd

Date posted: 4y ago

I feel like I am going insane. My ocd has never been this bad before. I’m waking up every morning with extreme dehabilitating anxiety. I am gagging and using the restroom all of the time. My pocd has reached an all time high. I work in a law firm and read a very disturbing case involving child abuse and child pornography. Ever since my world has been twisted upside down. I feel like the line is so thin. Like anyone can cross it in a split second and their world can be flipped upside down in an instant. I have a daughter of my own and that night after having read that story at work, my intrusive thoughts and feelings were at an all time high. I was changing her diaper and had intrusive thoughts which I knew was going to, givin the triggering and emotionally draining day I had. I quickly pushed them out of my head and then what happened next is some what of a blur because I have spent the last five days ruminating it over and over and over again in my head. I was trying to get her to lay down in her crib and she kept standing up. I was gonna lay her down in a way that required me to maneuver her with one hand and that one hand would be in between her legs, over her clothes and her diaper. I see people carry and handle their babies like this all of the time but I always avoid it. This time I didn’t. I fought the compulsion to move my hand. Because it is in fact, not a sexual thing at all. But in my mind I had it made out to be. I remember moving her super quickly in that fashion and immediately feeling guilt like I did it in a malicious sexual way. Even though the movement itself is not sexual at all, because it has been in my mind forever as a sexual place I’ve always avoided it. I was attempting to fight the compulsion and now as a result because I didn’t move my hand, I feel like I have done something horrible. I feel so guilty. All because of a quick 5 second movement. I keep imagining me without my daughter, going to jail, her not having me, my family disowning me. I can’t handle the immense amount of emotional distress I am feeling because of this event. I keep feeling like I could’ve moved her in a different way, why did I have to move Her in the way that required my hand to be between her legs? Was it me trying to somehow act out on the intrusive thoughts I had previously? I am so torn apart by this. I would never ever intentionally hurt my baby. Ever. My biggest fear is her being abused. In an attempt to stand up to my ocd and desexualize that specific action, it has launched me into the worst ocd episode of my life.

Username: EFF_OCD

Date posted: 1y ago

Lindsay Clancy case…

This case has convinced me because of my ocd, I am unworthy of motherhood. I have harm ocd so how bad would my PP ocd be? It’s honestly my biggest fear to ever hurt someone it makes me sick to think about. I have been a wreck all night and just want to cry. My fiancé wants a child. So do I. But how do I tell him I don’t think I can do it now. My advice is not to get on Tik tok if this story triggers you bc it’s flooded with videos. I feel hopeless about this and it’s even triggered my harm ocd in general about anyone and anything right now. Ugh!!! Hugs to anyone else who is struggling. & to moms with OCD, I want you to know that you are warriors and my BIGGEST hope and inspiration. Maybe OCD will take motherhood from me, but maybe it won’t. I don’t know. I’m a mess and I feel like no one understands 🥹

Username: cam1724

Date posted: 1y ago

Trigger warning! Harm ocd

Hi guys. So idk who all has read about the Lindsay Clancy case, but ever since it’s been brought out, my harm ocd has sky rocketed. With thoughts towards my fiancé and even my dog 😞 I don’t have any kids, but the idea of losing control one day and acting on these thoughts is really getting to me. My biggest theme for years was harm, then went to suicidal for 2 years, and now I’m right back to harm and it’s freaking me out 😞

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Triggered by a true crime case.

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