Question

I'm a straight man that suffers from SO-OCD/HOCD. If you have read this and you have the same subset of OCD PLEASE comment. Do you have thoughts about a person on the same gender that says "he is cute" or "he is sexy" or "he is my type",she if youre a woman. I do not like those kinds thoughts, in fact i loathe it, but I have learned not to give those kinds of thoughts power. But i'm just curious about if you have those kind of thoughts I have a girlfriend that I would VERY VERY much want to get married to, but im just afraid that maybe in the end I might end up hurting her because maybe I'm gay. I do want to be gay and I have nothing against gay people, its just I want to have a happy marriage with my girlfriend.

Username: Pronged_pingPronged_ping

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

Hey! I struggled with this theme a few years back and I occasionally have it pop back up. OCD wants you to obsess over those thoughts. You can address them by saying maybe I am, maybe I’m not ( I used that one a lot) Hang in there!!!

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 1y ago

I have the same thoughts as you i’m been a straight man for my whole life and plan and wish to continue being i have a amazing girlfriend i love but hocd and others makes me think i am my fears and i don’t have feelings i really want to live happily married with her etc but I’m scared that maybe i am gay i was never like this until hocd everytime i see a good looking man i cannot stop thinking of thoughts i don’t wanna have etc hocd make it feel so real man i hate it why do i got to have this

Username: Why does this happenWhy does thi...

Date posted: 1y ago

Yes I’ve had that, it’s horrible man

Username: Carlos ACarlos A

Date posted: 1y ago

It happens to me and it bothers me a lot, it's as if my mind knows that I don't want some type of thought like that to come out and at the moment it sends a thought of that style but with malicious intent, I can recognize that it doesn't go at all with what I feel but it doesn't I can avoid doubting and having anxiety about him, they are very uncomfortable and do not represent what I want, and I can recognize the attractiveness of certain men but until then, I am not comfortable with more than that

Username: blazedblazed

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

This theme truly messed with my mind and I struggled for a long time. I had the same thought of “what if I’m gay and I end up hurting someone down the line?”, and other distressing thoughts. I used to experience them on a daily basis from the moment I woke up, right until I went to sleep at night. Now they pop up here and there. I had to learn to not focus on the content of my thoughts, but focus on changing my behaviours (avoidance, rumination, catastrophizing, etc). I had to let myself feel all the emotions that surfaced instead of pushing them away bc that made it worse. Acknowledge the thoughts and feelings you’re experiencing but don’t go beyond that—don’t engage, fight back, or try to solve it. Let them be and eventually they’ll start losing power. It’s a hard process but you can get through it with time and practice.

Username: Gay

Date posted: 6y ago

So, I’m gay, but I have obsessive thoughts about being straight. The idea of being with a man is not something that I find appealing, but a mix of OCD and compulsory heterosexuality causes a lot of anxiety for me. Does anyone else have similar issues? If so, do you have any advice on how to cope?

Username: My OCD Academia

Date posted: 1y ago

OCD Sucks

I developed a crush for this girl and it feels great. But ya know, OCD did its thing and makes me feel like I don't really like her and that I like guys. It drives me absolutely mad. I even went to the gym today (which I have been avoiding) and one of the front desk guys was id say good looking and my OCD ran with that and told me I like guys and all the what if questions came roaring in. It feels really provocative to think persons of the same sex are good looking. It feels like anytime I look at a guy, my OCD tells me"oh look! you noticed him, how come you're not noticing the women?, you're gay." I get so many intrusive thoughts about any guy I look at and It feels so real. I feel defeated today. If anybody can relate, I'd like to hear.

Sexual Orientation OCD

Username: unkindledhis...

Date posted: 42w ago

HOCD/SO OCD

I have been heterosexual all my life and been exclusively attracted to women in all aspects. Although, admittedly that I find all people aesthetically attractive (regardless of gender), it was in my nature to complement them and admire them for who they are. I’m currently in a committed relationship with my girlfriend and have been happy up until the end of 2023. It wasn’t until the start of January where the normal things that I did made me question about my sexuality. I kept obsessing over it and overthinking about it up until the point that I kept asking for reassurance from my family and partner as well as none-stop researching about it. It has been taking up my time in school and I’m losing my sleep. My mind was telling me that I was bisexual or gay, but deep down it felt wrong like it wasn’t me. I was having thoughts and fantasies that would wake me up and feel repulsed. I am slowly staring to get numb and be emotionless. I also have been very anxious and have started to get attractions and arousals that I didn’t like. I’m also starting to lose attraction to my partner and there have been instances where the thoughts were so close to convincing me. I just want to be happy with my girlfriend and I don’t want to lose our relationship as well as our future. I don’t also want to lose my self. I have been getting false attractions, groinal responses, thoughts and images that are bothersome and makes me feel repulsed. It gets worse whenever I analyze my past. I don’t know what to do and I just want to cry.

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