Do others with SO-OCD/HOCD experience unwanted same-sex attraction thoughts?

Question

I'm a straight man that suffers from SO-OCD/HOCD. If you have read this and you have the same subset of OCD PLEASE comment. Do you have thoughts about a person on the same gender that says "he is cute" or "he is sexy" or "he is my type",she if youre a woman. I do not like those kinds thoughts, in fact i loathe it, but I have learned not to give those kinds of thoughts power. But i'm just curious about if you have those kind of thoughts I have a girlfriend that I would VERY VERY much want to get married to, but im just afraid that maybe in the end I might end up hurting her because maybe I'm gay. I do want to be gay and I have nothing against gay people, its just I want to have a happy marriage with my girlfriend.

Username: Pronged_pingPronged_ping

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 50w ago

Hey! I struggled with this theme a few years back and I occasionally have it pop back up. OCD wants you to obsess over those thoughts. You can address them by saying maybe I am, maybe I’m not ( I used that one a lot) Hang in there!!!

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 50w ago

I have the same thoughts as you i’m been a straight man for my whole life and plan and wish to continue being i have a amazing girlfriend i love but hocd and others makes me think i am my fears and i don’t have feelings i really want to live happily married with her etc but I’m scared that maybe i am gay i was never like this until hocd everytime i see a good looking man i cannot stop thinking of thoughts i don’t wanna have etc hocd make it feel so real man i hate it why do i got to have this

Username: Why does this happenWhy does thi...

Date posted: 50w ago

Yes I’ve had that, it’s horrible man

Username: Carlos ACarlos A

Date posted: 50w ago

It happens to me and it bothers me a lot, it's as if my mind knows that I don't want some type of thought like that to come out and at the moment it sends a thought of that style but with malicious intent, I can recognize that it doesn't go at all with what I feel but it doesn't I can avoid doubting and having anxiety about him, they are very uncomfortable and do not represent what I want, and I can recognize the attractiveness of certain men but until then, I am not comfortable with more than that

Username: blazedblazed

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 50w ago

This theme truly messed with my mind and I struggled for a long time. I had the same thought of “what if I’m gay and I end up hurting someone down the line?”, and other distressing thoughts. I used to experience them on a daily basis from the moment I woke up, right until I went to sleep at night. Now they pop up here and there. I had to learn to not focus on the content of my thoughts, but focus on changing my behaviours (avoidance, rumination, catastrophizing, etc). I had to let myself feel all the emotions that surfaced instead of pushing them away bc that made it worse. Acknowledge the thoughts and feelings you’re experiencing but don’t go beyond that—don’t engage, fight back, or try to solve it. Let them be and eventually they’ll start losing power. It’s a hard process but you can get through it with time and practice.

Username: Gay

Date posted: 6y ago

So, I’m gay, but I have obsessive thoughts about being straight. The idea of being with a man is not something that I find appealing, but a mix of OCD and compulsory heterosexuality causes a lot of anxiety for me. Does anyone else have similar issues? If so, do you have any advice on how to cope?

Username: lucxs

Date posted: 46w ago

sexual ocd while being in a relationship

I am so happy with my girlfriend, but every time i see a good looking guy i start having thoughts about liking the guy and feeling guilty cause i am in a relationship and even if i would be cuddling with my girl, a random thought about a guy could ruin my mentality, it would make me feel like an impostor and i wanna know if this is normal, i know my ocd can make me question my SO, but i dont want it just to be denial, idk how to differentiate denial from my ocd.

Sexual Orientation OCD

Username: unkindledhis...

Date posted: 37w ago

HOCD/SO OCD

I have been heterosexual all my life and been exclusively attracted to women in all aspects. Although, admittedly that I find all people aesthetically attractive (regardless of gender), it was in my nature to complement them and admire them for who they are. I’m currently in a committed relationship with my girlfriend and have been happy up until the end of 2023. It wasn’t until the start of January where the normal things that I did made me question about my sexuality. I kept obsessing over it and overthinking about it up until the point that I kept asking for reassurance from my family and partner as well as none-stop researching about it. It has been taking up my time in school and I’m losing my sleep. My mind was telling me that I was bisexual or gay, but deep down it felt wrong like it wasn’t me. I was having thoughts and fantasies that would wake me up and feel repulsed. I am slowly staring to get numb and be emotionless. I also have been very anxious and have started to get attractions and arousals that I didn’t like. I’m also starting to lose attraction to my partner and there have been instances where the thoughts were so close to convincing me. I just want to be happy with my girlfriend and I don’t want to lose our relationship as well as our future. I don’t also want to lose my self. I have been getting false attractions, groinal responses, thoughts and images that are bothersome and makes me feel repulsed. It gets worse whenever I analyze my past. I don’t know what to do and I just want to cry.

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Do others with SO-OCD/HOCD experience unwanted same-sex attraction thoughts?

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