I fear I’ve reached the end of my road. I’m scared. I don’t want to die but I don’t want to live. I’ve struggled with depression for years I’m 27. I can’t see away forward. OCD has consumed me. It sounds nice to not suffer anymore.
hey you aren’t alone. it’ll get better! just remember the thoughts are just thoughts. have you considered medication?
I was in your place, also 27 and still sometimes feel like giving up, but when I feel sad I try to do some intense workout or listen to nature sounds, ocd is hell but we are stronger. Its ok to lay down and embrace yourself if you have no strength. Hope you get better soon 🙏
Sometimes it’s incredibly hard. I get the feeling of not wanting to die but kind of wanting things to just stop. The pain will eventually go away even though it feels like it won’t. I don’t know how to keep going either but you gotta keep going through the motions until they don’t feel pointless anymore
The struggle is real
That’s your OCD taking over. Lean into it and don’t be afraid. You are not your OCD. You have value and there is help. Keep in the game so you got a chance to be happy.
I’ve tried meds before and they were terrible. I made another NOCD appt to readmit myself into therapy again. I’m so scared.
I’m 28 now, I went through a time where I did NOCD ERP and took medication and was able to experience a glimpse of a “normal” life. There were still intrusive thoughts but was able to cope. I stopped ERP and medication. I experienced different themes, but one of my hardest themes came back. It’s so hard, especially when you’re in your late 20s, but we can’t give up. We grieve that we were stripped from normal milestones and time lost. Sending you support.
@yessyess Thank you. I am scheduling with my previous therapist again. I just wanted to be a mom in the furtive and wife. I don’t want to lose that but my brain won’t stop. It’s saying I don’t want it.
Hi everyone, I’m reaching out here because I know this community understands the daily battles of living with OCD. Recently, I hit a really dark place and tried to take my own life. It’s been hard to admit, but I’m still here, and I’m trying to find a way forward. OCD feels relentless sometimes—the intrusive thoughts, the constant doubt, the cycles that never seem to end. It became so overwhelming that I didn’t see a way out. I know I need help, and I’m working on reaching out to professionals, but I also wanted to connect here. To those who’ve been in a similar place: What helped you keep going? How do you manage the darkest moments when OCD takes over? I feel like I’m holding on by a thread, but I’m holding on. Any advice, words of encouragement, or personal experiences would mean so much to me right now. Thank you for reading this, and for being part of a space where we can be honest about our struggles.
I can't stop thinking about ending my life. I feel like I'm not even living, I'm just surviving. Everyone is capable of being a person and functioning and I'm just stuck here avoiding everything. My psychiatrist said my ocd is severe and it will all take time and I'll start erp and I'm already on medication but I just feel so depressed and like I won't be able to handle erp and it's already too late for me. I feel inhuman, it's debilitating. My major theme is just fear or contamination, I can't even make myself a meal I can't touch anything in the kitchen. I get stuck in the shower for 2 hours and when I don't shower because I'm depressed I feel like a walking germ. My hands are a mess, my school work is shit, I avoid and avoid and I'm just so tired of "living" like this. My psychiatrist said they don't have any therapists available right now like.... excuse me? What do you mean u don't have any 😭 I honestly don't even know why I'm typing this becuase nothing helps, nothing ever will. I'm so deep into this I can't get out, my room looks like shit, I can't live in this body anymore, I really can't. I let everyone down, I am and will be such a dissapointment. I don't have any dreams or goals or passions I just wasn't made to be here. I don't know how or who to ask for help like there's nothing anyone can do, I'm already on meds. I can't keep being like this, seeing everyone judge me for acting insane.
I can't live with OCD anymore. It's ruining my life. I feel like I'm being constantly bullied in my own mind all day everyday. I don't know if what I think and feel is ever real or normal or okay, what is me and what is the OCD thoughts. I don't know if any of my experiences are normal. I'm exhausted from picking apart every single conversation I ever have with anyone until I'm strung out by a vague and ambiguous feeling of guilt. I'm tired of feeling like I'm a bad person and feeling scared all the time and not knowing why and having my brain spin me out on an endless spiralling train of thoughts that never goes anywhere and just makes me feel disconnected from everything and everyone around me. I don't know what I feel and if what I feel is normal or if anything I am doing is real and actually me or if I'm 'losing my mind.' I don't even know if this makes any sense. I get into these states of mind where every thought in my head and everything I feel and perceive makes me question my own sanity. I don't know if anyone likes me because I have absolutely no concept of what I am actually like. I feel completely lost and confused CONSTANTLY.
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