why do i have this discomfort?

I can relate to this, and have noticed that it happens when I miss a dose or a few of medicine, if I’m about to get my period or when I become exhausted, overbooked, overstimulated or burnt out. Especially if I stop taking my meds all together (haven’t done this in a while, but it’s happened more times than I’d like to admit). I get upset with myself when I get in this state of mind, because I value connection. Im noticing that when I get to this point I start questioning how things would be if I was born into another family, if I had different friends or was in a different partnership. If there are people that I would relate to more than the people that I spend my time with. And then, yes, I start to get irritated with a lot of little things that didn’t bother me before I got into an irritated and uncertain state of mind. I’ve currently been doing a lot of therapy that focuses on skill based tools and processing. I feel like this always helps me, and I’ve been working a lot harder at using these skills so that they’re habits. I also know that when I into this mindset I that it is really important to start engaging in more self care such as hobbies that make me happy or trying new hobbies on my own, or making time for other people that I don’t see as often. I personally have had a problem with codependency and think this adds to the irritation, and I think limiting how much I see these specific people (without isolating), and creating a bit of space is helpful. Especially when everything about these people starts to irritate me. For me I think balance in my relationships is going to be key to maintaining my relationships. I also sure to get in with my therapist to process why these feelings are coming up, I have to always question: is the negativity towards them because there are underlying emotions happening? Have I been people pleasing too much? Have I been masking often and am I tired of that? Have I not set boundaries for myself/others? Am I ruminating on the uncertainty of the unknown- a different life, different people in my life, how these relationships will look in however many years? -the list continues. I haven’t exactly figured out why this starts to happen, but I think I’m starting to notice my patterns, and beginning to notice the changes that I need to make to help prevent and to start to maintain healthy relationships. This is one of the hardest issues I struggle with. I hope you are able to get a better sense of why these feelings come up for you and how to manage them. You’re not alone.

I wish I had good advice but I can relate in the way that there are just certain people that I love but I also cannot stand anything they do and I just don't understand why, like they scratch their legs or breathe too loud or eat too loud and it really bugs me or like laughing at weird time and like I know they're things they can't control but like it really bugs me, I think I have misophonia and so I just get really uncomfortable by certain actions that product noises I don't like to the point where I have to close my eyes and plug my ears or leave the room, maybe try noise canceling headphones or tell your partner about your current problems and maybe they can try to eat quieter or all that???

Omg u have stated exactly how I've been feeling to the T @fullofwonder. Thank you!!

hey, i totally get how tough and confusing it must feel when the things that make your loved ones happy start to trigger such intense irritation for you. it sounds really challenging to manage those feelings, especially when they're about something as common as eating. you're not alone in this struggle, and it's okay to be feeling overwhelmed by it all. 💔 i've been where you are with my ocd, and what really helped me was this free AI tool called "unstuck" ([www.keepunstuck.com/try](http://www.keepunstuck.com/try)) that my ocd therapist recommended. it'll be especially helpful for you because it offers personalized step-by-step support that mimics an ocd therapist, guiding you through those tough moments when you're fixated on your loved ones' actions. i hate when people promote stuff, but i really think it can help you because it's changed my life. lmk if you have Qs or just want to talk more! <3