- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
Take it from someone who has broken up with someone bc of rOCD, it doesn’t make you feel any better. If you want to be with the person, be with the person. I know how it feels to think breaking up with them is your way out but it’s not. Your way out is actually through. Going through the relationship and growing from it and accepting that sometimes you have these feelings. For me even the thought of my relationship naturally ending scares me. There have been days where I’ve thought about it so much that I wanted to break up with him just so that he couldn’t break up with me, lol. I just realized that I was trying to over protect myself in a way. I was trying to prevent something bad from happening, but I didn’t stop to think that maybe I would’ve prevented something good from happening. Hang in there :)
- Date posted
- 5y
Does the thought of not being with the person scare you? Do you not want to be with this person? Usually you know the answer and the rOCD flips it. For example, if you were to answer “yes, I want to be with the person” your rOCD would say “no you don’t, you’re lying”. The thing is, as triggering as it may be, you don’t know if your partner is the one. There is no feeling or answer as to if you are going to be with that person. I had to learn that. As cliche and unhelpful as this statement may sound, love is a choice. It’s choosing the person even when you don’t feel like you want them. It’s choosing them on good days and bad days. :) Hang in there!!
- Date posted
- 5y
Sometimes rOCD can make you feel numb as well. When you spend all your energy on ruminating, it can wear you out, which might be why you feel that way. Hope this helps a little.
- Date posted
- 5y
I’m going through the exact same thing and it’s exhaustingggggggg
- Date posted
- 5y
The thought of not being with my partner doesn’t scare me- it makes me sad but I know I’d be ok (but also part of me thinks I’d feel relief as I wouldn’t feel like this) but I do want to be with him. If the relationship naturally ends that is fine but my anxiety/rOCD can’t end it for me if that makes sense. Thank you your comments ?
- Date posted
- 5y
I’ve had it in past relationships, never realising what it was but I could justify ending the relationship until this one. It’s sad that something I want so much, and want to be happy in, is making me feel so miserable. 3 months ago if you’d asked me about the relationship ending, I’d have been devastated by the thought but these feelings and thoughts have made me so numb to it, like I don’t really care. I have had massive issues in past relationships but it’s quite a weird way to try and protect myself from being hurt by almost hurting myself? Is weird. But thank you for your comments!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 21w
For the past 3 months ish I’ve been struggling on and off with this anxiety and fixation over my relationship. To wondering if i still have feelings for an old friend, wondering if i actually love him, wondering if the thoughts are all real and im just trying to cover it up with ocd. It sucks, when im talking to my boyfriend i feel fine. The words i love you and talks about the future come naturally. I can’t imagine myself with anyone but him. But this constant rumination on my relationship is KILLING me and I’m scared it’s going to ruin what i have. It makes me numb and disconnected which therefore makes me believe the thoughts even more. They just feel so real sometimes and it’s so scary like why can i not just enjoy it. We’ve been together for a while so i know there’s periods of like feelings ebb and flowing but this is so much more. It’s just constantly sitting on my chest with anxiety. My compulsions are coming on this app, looking at photos of us and confessing it to him. He’s very understanding and helpful. I love him so much. I just need help / I’m also just starting new meds as well ..
- Date posted
- 21w
I struggle with rocd, and a big intrusive thought that I have is that I’m no longer in love with my partner. I am going through a depression right now, and I am struggling to feel any kind of passion towards anything at the moment. I am withdrawing from the people I love because I just feel like I want to be alone. When I’m with people I just feel exhausted by it. I guess my question is, has anyone ever felt like this from depression? Does it take feelings of love and attraction away? I can’t tell if this is my ocd or depression or a combination of both. But it’s starting to impact my relationship which makes me panic because losing it is my worst fear.
- Date posted
- 11w
Lately, I’ve been feeling extremely confused and guilty. My boyfriend has been really busy with exams, and we haven’t talked much this past week. I don’t really feel like I miss him, and that scares me. It makes me think maybe I don’t love him anymore, maybe I’ve changed, and maybe this relationship doesn’t feel right for me anymore. A few days ago, a friend invited me to go to a club with her and another girl. I know that if I went without my boyfriend, he would feel bad — not because he’s controlling, but because in our relationship, we’ve always had mutual boundaries and respect. I decided not to go, but ever since, I’ve been spiraling. My thoughts keep going: “What if I didn’t go just because of him?”, “What if I actually wanted to go, but I stopped myself because I don’t really love him?”, “What if I’m holding myself back and this relationship is limiting me?” All of this makes me think I’m bored, that I don’t like him anymore, or that I’m staying out of habit. It’s hard to tell what I really want or whether these thoughts are part of ROCD or some deeper truth. I keep wondering if I’m just attached to him because he’s my first boyfriend and we’ve been together for so long. Sometimes I even think I wouldn’t care if we broke up, and that I don’t feel anything for him anymore — and that absolutely destroys me, because he’s such a good person who truly loves me. He doesn’t deserve to be treated with so much doubt and coldness. I feel miserable. I don’t know what’s real and what’s just obsession. It hurts that I can’t feel any clarity or peace. I just want to know if this is ROCD or if I’m in denial and refusing to accept the truth
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