I feel not interested in my partner. I look back on good memories and they turn to cringe. I keep cringing and I don’t understand why. He’s so sweet and perfect for me just I just keep getting the ick. Please help
I would try to not physically react when you get the icky feeling, if you notice yourself doing that. I sometimes contort my face when I remember my themes, but when I remind myself that they’re just thoughts, and try to keep or return to a neutral face, it tends to make the disgust less intense.
So sorry you’re getting through this. I can relate, definitely. Have you been to therapy? Have you ever talked to someone about it?
@brenoaugusto I have been to therapy and it helps. I just hate this uncomfortable feeling. I just want to scream bc I freak out that I feel this way
Me too! It’s terrible, i’ve worked so hard to elaborate the proper tools to manage getting through crisis, but it’s been definitely hard these past days. It seems like it’s such a tricky disorder ‘cause it sticks to whatever feels most important to us at the present moment, and it finds its way to taking it from us, targeting whatever’s sustaining some quality of life to us.
This definitely hits home for me. I’ve been with my husband for 12 years and married for 10 and this happened to me and it just destroys me. It’s the worst.
@ctmont Can you describe what happens to you possibly?
@Anxiety girl Certain things will trigger the thinking of “he’s not right for you. You’re wasting your life. You’ve wasted years of your life.” Something as stupid as him saying “I wish we flirted like that couple.” Can send me spiraling out of my mind. It comes from the fact that I’m not a super touchy/affectionate person and then it leaves me questioning “well you must not love him. You must not be attracted to him.”
@ctmont Wow. This was absolutely so helpful. Thank you so much. This was honestly was a Christmas miracle. I just feel so out of touch with him. I feel like everything is cringe. everything he says I’m like ew. But I was seriously never like that so I just know it’s my anxiety talking and my OCD. I always say I wouldn’t be freaking out if I didn’t want this to happen
Me too!! It sucks but what helps me talk through my thoughts with my partner or a friend!
@Rain If you don’t mind me asking, can you give examples of your thoughts?
@Anxiety girl Mine are like me thinking he isn’t the one or that I find him unattractive or that I don’t actually like him because we don’t have the same spark like in the beginning. Another thing is like past memories or songs that we used to call “ours” I get the ick from them. In reality these are all normal and healthy things in a long term relationship.
@Rain I think about like cuddling, which is like my favorite thing ever and I just get the ick from it. It’s so sad because it’s my favorite thing in the whole world. But now it feels like it’s just cringe. Like is this actually how I feel or is it my OCD
@Anxiety girl Well for me my boyfriend is my best thing in the world and sometimes I get the ick from him. What helps me is I think if the world without him and then I get really really really sad so it kinda helps me understand my true intention also the fact that I get anxious when I have these thoughts also shows me. Does that help?
@Rain Yes! You are like a Christmas miracle!!!! This makes so much sense. I always say I wouldn’t be having these thoughts if I didn’t want them and they are just my anxiety talking
@Anxiety girl Yeppers!! Merry Christmas I’m happy I could help!!
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