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It happens to me. Let me tell you why this happens. It sticks in your mind because you are terrified of becoming that. There are even categories, I mean, sexual themed OCD are sooo common that there are categories of sexual intrusive thoughts. Mines strated just like you said, nightmares where I seemed to enjoy while i was in the dream but whe i woka up I was always terrified of it. They are nightmares, not real, you ar not those thoughs and the only thing that makes them so big is that you fear them. You can be calm that you have nothing to do with thos thoughts. Consider you thoughs like nightmares while being awake. They'll pass, you have no control over them

hi! i’m going through this too, and it’s really tough for me at the moment, so i know how you feel. esp w the intentionally thinking about these subjects to try to prove to yourself that you don’t really desire them. it’s sooo common i promise. having thoughts on these things and acting on them are completely different, and since you feel so disgusted about it, it just means it’s a fear of yours! OCD knows your greatest fears and feeds off of them- sometimes it’s really hard to make OCD shut up. i know it feels so uncomfortable and wrong, but you’re really not alone in this.

I’ve dealt with that. Don’t beat yourself up. Praying for you!!!