I'm scared that maybe I'm a monster

So recently me and my friend got into a huge fight and they brought up how I always made them uncomfortable, I didn't realize that then and I would always joke about things without realizing it might have affect on people because I was joking and now that I'm thinking about it I feel disgusting, I feel like I molested them without having the intention to molest them(??). I wish I really knew sooner and that this would never happen. Maybe I am a monster I don't know.

Username: FeraroFeraro

Date posted: 50w ago

Don’t try to freak out. Apologizing even just one time sincerely is enough. Im sure your friend understands that you did not mean to hurt them. We are human and all of our brains work different, so a joke that one person might think is funny might not be the same way to someone else. We have all said things before that accidentally might have made someone else feel uncomfortable. That doesnt make you a monster, that just means you had lack of communication and didnt know that your friend has a different taste in humor. Think of it as a learning experience, and everything will be okay.

Username: CinderWolfCinderWolf

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 50w ago

You are NOT a monster. I’m assuming you’re talking about sexual jokes. Some people just don’t vibe with that. I have friends that I joke with sexually all the time and that’s just how we joke around. Others I know don’t take it as a joke, and so, I don’t make those kinds of jokes around them. I joke with some of my girlfriends that we’re dating, give them sex advice, tease their sexual experiences and that’s just how we joke. I get it. I think the right thing is to go to them and sincerely apologize for making them feel uncomfortable and let them know that was not your intention and that you will no longer joke like that around them. Let them know if you ever saying anything that makes them uncomfortable to tell you and you will act accordingly and avoid that topic of conversation. Some people just don’t joke around that way, and that’s okay! For the people that joke around like that, have at it! But it’s good to respect your friends when they feel uncomfortable. That doesn’t mean they don’t want to be their friend, they’re just telling you how they feel and want you to do something about it. I hope this helps! Xoxo

Username: RockerstarRockerstar

Date posted: 50w ago

By the way I apologize twice but I still feel like it's not enough, so I'm planning to make a 10,000 word essay about how sorry I am and that I never ment to make them feel that way, but then again I still feel like that won't make anything better.

Username: NicaNica

Date posted: 50w ago

@Rockerstar Do not write that letter. You’re confessing and that is a compulsion which makes OCD worse. You apologized twice, so that is good. And do better next time. You cannot fix what happened in the past but you can do better now and in the future.

Username: RockerstarRockerstar

Date posted: 50w ago

I will do better in the future, by the way I don't mean this in a mean way but what does confessing mean in your sentence??

Username: worryqueen

Date posted: 4y ago

I feel like such a monster. I wish I could get over this obsession but it seems to always be at the back of my mind. I know sexual experimentation is normal as a child, but what I did, I think goes beyond that. I was 10, and I put my little sister’s hand on my breast while she was sleeping. For my own sexual gain or curiosity, I don’t even know at this point. I don’t think I can ever let myself live this down. I’m so disgusting and terrible and I wish I could erase what I’ve done, I really do.

Username: Saturnus606

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

I feel like an irredeemable human (POCD)

I feel like throughout my teens into my early adult years I did or said stuff that that makes me a monster. My most recent trigger is a memory involving rping in a roleplay server where minors were present. I won’t excuse myself for what I think I did, but I feel like I put inappropriate context for things where I shouldn’t have and made a complete mockery of what I believe now.

Username: bxygenius

Date posted: 32w ago

i'm scared

im scared im not a good person and i never will be. ive had real events about obsessions before but i always thought its nothing i cant beat with self compassion and therapy in the future but i feel like a horrible person for things that happened years ago and even the memory is fuzzy. i was a toxic child who shouldnt have been on the internet but im scared i was responsible for something bad. i hate myself. this doesnt feel like something any amount of self compassion could ever fix

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I'm scared that maybe I'm a monster

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