Username: jag92

Date posted: 48w ago

Soocd

Not good today! I’ve been struggling with the thoughts again after having a little bit where I was managing. Just saw an advert of a woman putting on lipstick and it really triggered me looking at her lips like I felt a rush in my body and aroused and then a thought like being with a woman it what you really want….that’s why you’ve not been happy with your ex and why you have lost the attraction to men and find dating scary 🙈🙈I hate this! It was like a rush of excitement but made me feel so panicky and sick cause I don’t want that! I want to be with a man and have more kids! I’ve always wanted romance with a man! Sex now scares me cause of all the anxiety like it’s telling me I enjoy sex with a woman more but that’s not what I want! I used to like sex with men but I’ve always been more of a romantic than a sexual person HELP 😫

Username: 6827368273

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 48w ago

Hello! I’m sorry you are going through this. I have the same theme. I have also felt the “excitement” but terrified symptom. I call it a symptom because I hope it is a symptom of ocd and not the real type of excitement. Everything you said, resonates . Have you tried erp ?

Username: 6827368273

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 48w ago

@68273 I got groinals before, like stronger than real arousal. Now, it’s down to arousal feelings w no anxiety, that’s throws me off. Even false attraction w out anxiety. It’s very difficult but I have had moments of clarity w erp. I’m not 100 yet, would say more like 60 percent recovered

Username: jag92jag92

Date posted: 48w ago

@68273 Thanks for responding! I know it’s probably reassurance seeking but I feel like I haven’t seeked reassurance for ages and I need it atm

Username: user74128588493user74128588493

Date posted: 48w ago

@68273 same!!!

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 48w ago

Sorry you're dealing with this, you are not alone! I've had the same feelings but I try not to give OCD the power, just acknowledge the uncomfy feelings and move on. no need to give it more attention than it's already taking from you, and that's how it gets quieter over time.

Username: jag92jag92

Date posted: 48w ago

Also sorry for the too much information but does anyone who gets a groinal then feel aroused so then wants to self pleasure but not about the thing that gave them the groinal just because they feel aroused 😩

Username: JPT1988JPT1988

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 48w ago

I still do it once a day, and it has been 5 months.

Username: jag92jag92

Date posted: 48w ago

Thankyou anonymous!

Username: jag92jag92

Date posted: 48w ago

I really want to be with a man and have more kids but I don’t know how to date! I’ve lost attraction to men and feel like Maybe I’ve always faked it cause I want a family (it all went away when I first got with my ex tho) but i don’t know how I get passed it enough to date :(

Username: jag92jag92

Date posted: 48w ago

Yeah I tried some ERP but I don’t think it worked like in normal life when I’m exposed I try to not respond and just think about how I want my life to look and just think maybe but I also thing maybe I reassure myself and avoid somethings but I do try to force myself not to avoid things ….when I did more exposure work on purpose it made me feel so horrendous like it was actually proving I’m a lesbian so I had to stop it I know that’s probably not the best but it made me suicidal so I stopped …the last couple of months I’ve been ok with just the ERP to everyday life exposure but the last few days it’s gotten worse (I think it’s cause my ex is with someone new so it makes me feel like I should be so I try the dating apps and then feel anxious cause I’ve lost attraction to men- my ex was abusive tho so my heads a bit messed up too but then I feel like I’m using that as an excuse to avoid dating too) vicious circle haha

Username: JPT1988JPT1988

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 48w ago

@jag92 Hey Jag! SOCD is rough, however, the perk is you get CONSTANT exposure, which is extremely terrifying at first, but if you don’t avoid, allow the thoughts to come and go without seeking relief, arguing with the thoughts (as crazy as that sounds), the anxiety will settle, and you will feel more and more like yourself as time goes on. What helped me is I began to realize I had groinal reactions and sexual thoughts about allllll sorts of things, and did not think much of it because I knew at the time they were just thoughts. It’s the fear that caused the obsession (simply trauma), which is why ERP is so effective. Love ya man! Hang in there.

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 48w ago

@Jtremain1988 But can a “groinal” be an erection? I’m scared erp to my thoughts will jus solidify I’m gay, since I got an erection to imagining gay sex.

Username: JPT1988JPT1988

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 48w ago

@Anonymous Personally, I had to find out. I will never live in fear. Choice is yours my friend.

Username: 6827368273

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 48w ago

@Jtremain1988 How long did you have to do erp?

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 48w ago

@JPT1988 Yeh I’m gonna do it, I emailed some therapists. just so weird tho. No matter how hard I try now I cannot get aroused to it, but yesterday it was driving me crazy and arousing every second I don’t understand this at all

Username: JPT1988JPT1988

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 48w ago

@Anonymous Thats perfect my friend. It’s just another exposure. Let your thoughts run wild, and your anxiety go nuts. Will prob scare the shit out of you at first, and very confused, with all sorts of groinal reactions

Username: JPT1988JPT1988

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 48w ago

@JPT1988 Also, when you are deep in therapy, I would avoid this site. Reassurance is not your friend.

Username: JPT1988JPT1988

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 48w ago

I see my therapist every couple months.

Username: iwillbealright

Date posted: 5y ago

The thoughts are oh so bad again. I even can get turned on by the thought of being sexual with a girl but I really don’t want it. ( I’m a girl ). At least I don’t think I do. I looked up questioning sexuality and it said THIS MAY TRIGGER YOU— it said that if you fear it, it may be because you want it because “sexual attraction can be scary”. I don’t want to be with a girl but I feel like lately that’s all I can think about. I can’t even get turned on or get off ( sorry TMI maybe ) to the opposite sex but I can so easily with the same sex even though I don’t really want to. This is so scary I’m not sure what to do.

Username: Heleni

Date posted: 3y ago

To my fellow female SOOCD sufferers: I had some really good two weeks with some moments of clarity where I could see through all the bullsh*t my brain is producing. However I got pulled back in the cycle and here we go again 🙄 Atm I‘m not even that panicked about liking girls it is more about my attraction to men that I‘m obsessing about. I don‘t get aroused by just seeing a hot naked guy. I do fantasize more about being touched and everything by a guy and being wanted by him. Sorry if this is tmi but I‘m stressed that this means I don‘t like men enough and that Leads back to my fear of being in denial about being a lesbian. Because then I worry that I could be aroused just by the picture of a woman even if that has never happened before. And also men can get of just by lookin at pictures of hot woman, does that mean that if I am a straight girl I should be able to get turned on by just looking at good looking guys? This has been confusing the hell out of me and the whole concept of comphet hasn’t helped as well. Anyone who can relate?

Sexual Orientation OCD

Username: Anonymous

Date posted: 51w ago

How I see myself

Has anyone with soocd thought that they looked Lesbian and then just obsessed about it and then thought that must have meant that they were a lesbian and they all the times they though they were going to marry an man just all of a sudden though about it would be a women. It’s like a switch!!!!! It’s horrible and I don’t know what the truth is. I want a man and to have kids but now I’m question all of that and freaking out.

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