- Username
- MentalHelp
- Date posted
- 5y ago
My “bullshit-o-meter” is going off. This honestly sounds like propaganda spread to over exaggerate that stuff. That genuinely doesn’t make any sense. Logically, it’s so unbelievably stupid. So she cringed at the thought of lesbian sex when she’s a lesbian? Where does that make sense? Where? If she was being honest it probably didn’t make her cringe. She probably found it appealing or is making the whole story up to like I said before over exaggerate this to a degree in which doesn’t need to be exaggerated at all. This genuinely doesn’t make sense.
Yeah I’m with ‘TheReptileCyka’ on this!! People who are gay and in denial- enjoy the thoughts! They think it’s beautiful! People who are gay and out do not give it a second thought at all! Just how I know I’m a girl with blue eyes! I don’t give those a second thought! we just have to keep reminding ourselves this
Advice- it makes me question it too, but before this I knew how much I loved my boyfriend- and I don’t ever want to leave him! even if unwanted thoughts pop in your head about being gay or with someone- just remember- you don’t want to leave your boyfriend! That’s ocd for you! it tries to turn something so simple into something dangerous! We just need to learn to accept the uncertainty and the ocd bully will get bored and it will leave us all
Well that’s HER experience. Doesn’t have to be yours. Ppl who are in the LGBTQIA+ community have all kinds of sexual awakenings but that doesn’t make them the same for everyone. So her kiss w a man was dull. To her it’s bc she’s gay. To a straight woman maybe it’s that there were no sparks. No chemistry. She didn’t like how the kiss went. She didn’t really truly have feelings for the guy. Anything can make kisses dull. Being gay isn’t the only reason. You’re fine. ;)
I am terrified too. I’m avoiding it incase it doesn’t feel like I want it to. I hate this so so so much.
Gosh, now I’m wondering if I’m in love with my boyfriend
For the girl who said that, she’s not the spokesperson for everyone who realized that they were gay later in life. Because of OCD, we tend to latch onto anything related to our anxiety and immediately apply it to our own lives, despite it being the polar opposite. But hey, it may happen, it may not happen. We have to work on accepting uncertainty without looking for an answer. It’ll either come to us or we’ll just be comfortable with not knowing.
I‘m 19teen and I still haven’t had my first kiss now I fear that when I have it and it feels „dull“ I become lesbian or think that I‘m lesbian ?
So my hocd started over 2 years ago (I’m 20 yrs old now), when I was having a conversation with one of my friends and the thought popped into the back of my head what if the reason I don’t have a crush on any guys at my high school is because I’m a lesbian. Since then my sexuality has been on my mind 24/7 I didn’t know this was ocd until about a year ago but i’m only seeking treatment now. The hocd ramped up when I felt super aroused watching a movie with topless women, something that had never happened when watching men. Thing is I genuinely think I’m gay now, I’ve had this for so long that at first the thoughts disgusted me and caused me anxiety but now they don’t anymore. I saw so many tiktok videos about “pipelines” of certain interests gay people have that triggered me and read the comphet masterdoc which made me cry when I read it because I related to so much of it. When I was a child I was never boy crazy, I never really crushed on boys in my class (to be fair there were only 7) however I do remember writing a love note to a boy in first grade and having an immense celebrity crush on a disney channel star. I remember to certain things I did as a child that lead me to think I am gay and they keep replaying over and over in my head. Thing is over the past year I’ve had crushes on 3 guys I’ve met through dating apps. The last one I actually hung out with and I had my first kiss/makeout session 2 months ago. After that my hocd calmed down I enjoyed kissing him it felt euphoric the whole drive home just replaying our dates in my head. But now I can’t get the thought out of my head what if I didn’t like it enough? I didn’t get butterflies when we kissed (i do when I think back about it though) and didnt feel super aroused like that time I watched that movie. I feel nothing when I look at pictures and videos of men but with women I started getting this warm feeling in my chest which stressed me out even more. Idk what I am anymore and it is driving me insane. Does anyone relate?
I’ve struggled with HOCD for 4 years now and it’s awful. It started with a dream, and now it’s all I think about. Whenever my brain tries to tell me I’m in denial, I tell myself that the volume and severity of the thoughts I’m having aren’t normal which makes me feel a little better. I’m a woman who has always liked men, I’ve had INTENSE crushes on guys in the past. Even with HOCD I still have crushes. But lately it feels like I’m not even attracted to guys anymore - any time I see a pretty girl I check and see if there’s any sort of physical sensation accompanying it and sometimes there is. I don’t get turned on during sex anymore and I constantly attribute that to being possibly gay. It’s terrifying and I worry that my fears will come true if I don’t fight the thoughts, but they keep coming. I have no aversion to the LGBTQ+ community at all, I completely support them, but if I was lesbian it would erase all of what I’ve ever known about myself and that is what scares me. I used to hate being so boy crazy but now I want that back just so I don’t have to deal with these thoughts anymore. I go to therapy and take medication but don’t really talk about the thoughts out of the fear that acknowledging them out loud makes them true. I know I’m not alone, so if you’re also struggling with HOCD I hear you. <3
Before anyone reads this please be aware that this can be triggering and some 18+ content is mentioned on here. So I have been recently experiencing HOCD, been experiencing it for a few weeks now (it’s very new to me and something Ive never dealt with). My whole life I have never liked a girl nor have I ever had a crush or fell in love with a girl like I do with men. But just like everyone whenever people get into heat sometimes we watch things to pleasure ourselves. Well for me it’s always been lesbian love and have been doing that for years. There have been times where I go “am I bi” but then I would try to imagine myself with a women sexually and romantically and I would just cringe at the idea of it so I would just tell myself that I don’t and just carry on with my everyday life. But a few weeks ago I was talking to a friend about this and I explained to them that I am not bi because I would simply see lesbian love as something that I can relate to because of how women pleasure themselves can be relatable and because I said that my friend decides to make a comment saying ”idk maybe you are bi or not, you never know until you try” and for some reason that got in my head and for 2 weeks straight I was having non stop thoughts about my sexuality and trying to imagine myself with a girl and I would always cringe but there were times where it felt like “maybe I do want that” and I would panic again because I don’t want that and it’s not me but yet it feels like I’m lying to myself when I know deep down I’m straight. I also forgot to mention that I am in a relationship with my boyfriend and he’s literally everything to me. But during those two weeks I had lack of sleep and constant mental breakdowns because I don’t wanna be bi and I would panic whenever I felt calm and say things like ”it’s okay to be bi just be bi” it also didn’t help that so many of my friends were telling me that nothing is wrong with being bi and to not drop the idea fully. Like I know sexuality isn’t wrong but I want to drop the idea because I myself know deep down I’m straight but ofc my brain goes “nope you’re just tryna convince yourself”. It also ruins me enjoying my relationship because of these thoughts (as well as some ROCD thoughts). Idk I am just struggling with letting the thoughts in and trying not to analyze them or act on them. It’s very tiring 🥺 Like even rn I feel calm having these thoughts and it freaks me out a lil cause it makes me think that it’s true 😭
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