Its now three people that have triggered me. Genuinely one of the worst feelings in my life... ik im supposed to be uncertain, but how can i when people say my POCD / false memory OCD fear of "unknowingly explicitly messaging minors" might have been true...? Im genuinely so panicked and freaking upset...
Everything LillyX has said is right. But also bare in mind that you have ocd and with ocd you will not be able to FEEL certain about these thoughts because that’s what ocd does, I’ve had thoughts where I had 100% proof that they weren’t true but I still couldn’t FEEL certain. Nothing anyone says to you on here or elsewhere will make you feel certain because it’s your ocd in charge here. If she lied, (and no one on here can tell you if she did or didn’t) it’s not your fault, you’ve not done anything wrong so you need to stand up for yourself and not let ocd continue to lie to you about this. Accept that it’s making you feel uncomfortable and carry on with whatever you would like to be doing rather than continuously ruminate on this. Show your brain that you’re carrying on regardless of what it’s screaming at you and gradually it should start to calm down.
Let me ask you a question. My friend was messaging a girl who said she was 18years old, turns out she was 14 years old but he had absolutely no knowledge of this. Is he a P?
@LillyX No.
@LillyX My problem is that idek if the girl in my situation i posted about, lied about her age or not... its my worst fear... i dont ever want to ever explicitly message a minor in any way... not knowing if this actually happened or not makes it worse...
@Givenup So I hope that answers your question about yourself. You’re no different, stop writing yourself off so easily and being so harsh with yourself
@Givenup Why does it make any difference if you know or not? Ok so let’s say my friend messaged a minor who lied and said they were 18years old, he never found out if she was 18years old and just went on with his life. Is he at fault? Is he a P?
@LillyX No... but im so so scared about the uncertainty of it... ive read horror stories of minors lying about their age to explicitly be with adults and it scares me to no end...
@Givenup Okay so we’ve established that you are not a P. That situation scares most people but you have to learn to live with the uncertainty like any other person would. The reason you can’t is simply because you have ocd and it’s your mental illness bullying you that’s alll! You’re being so harsh because of your POCD.
@LillyX To myself or others...? Because people have genuinely triggered me in the past and said that she was lying about her age (two people) someone said "she might be" and it triggered me badly...
@LillyX If ive accidentally hurt people on her because of my posting, im sorry. But im so scared of this situation...
@Givenup People have also triggered me before but I’ve come to realise it’s not anyone else’s place to judge your personal situation. You are the one dealing with this , you are the one who makes the judgement. I believe deep down you know that either way you’ve done nothing wrong so try your best to stop reassurance seeking off of people who don’t know you personally:)
@LillyX Im sorry if ive upset you... i just dont ever want to ever unknowingly or knowingly explicitly be with minors in any way...
@Givenup You haven’t upset me at all!!☺️& I understand but we can’t control the unknown so you can’t blame yourself for that.
I am living this situation right now. I’ve received so much comfort with those who understand what I’m going through. Wow
I hope someone can respond... Im genuinely so triggered and so anxious... Dr disrespect was accused of inappropriately messaging and sending explicit images to a minor, and trying to meet up with them at twitchcon... my POCD is saying that my situation with me venting about 18+ explicit HOCD stuff to people in the PM's on an OCD groupchat I found from NOCD, including the minors, when I was 19, means that I am just as bad as they are... or worse... I pm'ed them from the support group and vented to them in private (including the minors) about my 18+ explicit HOCD struggles... one was uncomfortable by it so i stopped messaging her... the other gave me reassurance so i kept asking her for reassurance... I dont ever want to ever be attracted to minors in any way... I dont ever want to ever engage in any inappropriate relations with minors in any way... i dont ever want to EVER be a MAP, a P, or a gro*mer in any way... I dont ever want to be what my pocd says about me... im so scared... someone said that I need help, that I need to turn myself in, and that im hiding behind a diagnosis because of this situation... i genuinely feel so hopeless... I dont ever want to ever be a monster...
I hope someone can respond... Im genuinely so triggered and so anxious... Dr disrespect was accused of inappropriately messaging and sending explicit images to a minor, and trying to meet up with them at twitchcon... my POCD is saying that my situation with me venting about 18+ explicit HOCD stuff to people in the PM's on an OCD groupchat I found from NOCD, including the minors, when I was 19, means that I am just as bad as they are... or worse... I pm'ed them from the support group and vented to them in private (including the minors) about my 18+ explicit HOCD struggles... one was uncomfortable by it so i stopped venting to her after she told me she was uncomfortable by it twice... the other gave me reassurance so i kept asking her for reassurance for my 18+ hocd struggles... I dont ever want to ever be attracted to minors in any way... I dont ever want to ever engage in any inappropriate relations with minors in any way... i dont ever want to EVER be a MAP, a P, or a gro*mer in any way... I dont ever want to be what my pocd says about me... im so scared... someone said that I need help, that I need to turn myself in, and that im hiding behind a diagnosis because of this situation... i genuinely feel so hopeless... I dont ever want to ever be a monster...
I hope someone can respond... Im genuinely so triggered and so anxious... This actor was accused of grooming, giving and receiving explicit videos of underage women, and harassing women... my POCD is saying that my situation with me venting about 18+ explicit HOCD stuff to people in the PM's on an OCD groupchat I found from NOCD, including the minors, when I was 19, means that I am just as bad as they are... or worse... I pm'ed them from the support group and vented to them in private (including the minors) about my 18+ explicit HOCD struggles... one was uncomfortable by it so i stopped venting to her after she told me she was uncomfortable by it twice... the other gave me reassurance so i kept asking her for reassurance for my 18+ hocd struggles... I dont have any feelings towards minors in any way... the most i ever did was ask the 17 year old "what you bouta do about it 😂😂" when she told me to stop putting myself down when i was 19... i didnt pursue anything with her because of my age... im 23 now... i dont ever want to ever be with minors in any way...I dont ever want to ever be attracted to minors in any way... I dont ever want to ever engage in any inappropriate relations with minors in any way... i dont ever want to EVER be a MAP, a P, or a gro*mer in any way... I dont ever want to be what my pocd says about me... im so scared... plus now its saying that I called the second minor "cute" when i have no recollection of ever doing so... im also scared that I will get cancelled or being misunderstood because of this... someone said that I need help, that I need to turn myself in, and that im hiding behind a diagnosis because of this situation... i genuinely feel so hopeless...
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