Not the usual anxiety

I'm having so many racing thoughts after dealing with a very hectic week. I can't fall asleep despite being very tired because of so many thoughts. The thing that is worrying me is that I'm not feeling my usual anxiety that I get when having racing thoughts. Does that me something bad or good? Does it mean I'm managing better? Or have I become numb? am I just too tired? I decided to google racing thoughts but no anxiety and I wish I did not google this because there were so many scary things written about different mental health disorders and now I'm wondering is there something wrong with me besides intrusive thoughts (OCD) maybe it is something worse and more scary: but I have a tiny bit of anxiousness that I feel for a tiny moment but it is nothing close to the anxiety I usually go through. I just don't know what to make of this.

Steven55!

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

I'm sorry you're going through this. I don't know if you're in therapy, but OCD therapists will tell you to stay away from the internet. Many of us go through something they call habituation, which means you've had the episode so many times you get tired of it and numb to it. This is not a bad thing. As for your mind racing at night, it's not unusual. When I have anxiety at night, I'll have a small glass of sherry and then try to think of nice things, but that's just me. Eventually, I'll drop off. I know everyone's different. If you are not already in OCD therapy, I encourage you to consider retaining a trained OCD therapist who uses ERP therapy. You can find many good ones here through the NOCD site. Hope this helps.

Sarah🕊

Date posted: 1y

Thank you for posting a reply. I did talk to a NOCD therapist 2 years ago and I could not afford it anymore but I kept trying to practice ERP even if it is in a small way. I don't always work on ERP in a consistent way but just dealing with constant intrusive thoughts I'm always having to practice ERP through my day anyways to accomplish my tasks so as a result I'm pracitcing ERP on a daily basis. But I get moments when I get overwhelmed or feel numb and I feel stuck but I keep pushing through my fears and I try not to ruminate and engage with intrusive thoughts. I worry that my brain is becoming worse without me being aware and then one day just having a breakdown. The constant struggles with intrusive thoughts is always painful. To have anxiety is scary and to not have anxiety is also worrying as it's something I have dealt with for years so I feel like with ot without anxiety I'm always scared.

Steven55!

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

@Sarah🕊 - Sarah, a couple of thoughts...Do you have insurance? If so, if NOCD doesn't take your insurance perhaps others will. As much as I love NOCD, there are other good, trained OCD therapists out there. You may want to access the International OCD Foundation website. They publish a list of qualified OCD therapists, based on geography. Also, keep working with your ERP tools. Simply put, we are all trying to untangle malware in our brains and ERP is the best way to do it, although I do hope you can find a way to retain a trained OCD therapist as well. The more you use ERP, the better off you'll be, but it does take time and practice. Finally, always be mindful that recovery is not linear, it's messy. You'll have good days and bad days, so you have to assess the sum total. It takes time, but don't get discouraged. There is light at the end of the tunnel!

issphra 🫶🏻

Date posted: 25w

Numb and engaging more with thoughts? Help?

I’ve been feeling a bit stressed lately because my intrusive thoughts aren’t causing as much anxiety as they used to. It almost feels like I’m becoming a little numb to them, and because of that, I’m able to engage with them a bit longer. I don’t feel the usual rush of anxiety to pull away, and in some strange way, I even find myself focusing on them for a few seconds, like I’m actively thinking about them. It’s really stressing me out because I feel like by not feeling that immediate discomfort or anxiety, I’m letting the thoughts stay longer or giving them more power. I feel like part of me almost wants them to be there, and I don’t know if that’s a bad sign? They don’t even feel intrusive. Has anyone else experienced this? I’m just worried that the lack of anxiety is the reason I’m interacting more with these thoughts that would normal scare me. I feel guilt about it later. I am currently withdrawing from medication so that may contribute to this but it’s not the first time I experience this :/

Secretidentity

Date posted: 14w

Is no anxiety normal?

My thoughts are here but I have no anxiety. No matter what if I agree with the thoughts it doesn’t give me anxiety. If I think about how not having anxiety means that the thoughts are my truth since I’m not having anxiety. Nothing is giving me anxiety and I don’t know why but I don’t like that it’s not giving me anxiety. Is this normal?

Relationship OCD

M✨️

Date posted: 8w

I guess I'm not okay

I was sleeping after a very long stressful week at work and life but lately i was worried about myself cause I don't feel bad anymore just numb, I thought I was living and it's fine but I woke up now with jumble of different bad intrusive thoughts that it makes me feel like I'm crazy person it always happen when I'm stressed I guess but I feel like my mind is going crazy and I try to stop my mind from thoughts it's thinking about different things in one minute like idk what's going on Idk how to manage

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Not the usual anxiety

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