Pocd

I’m new to this theme but I jsut thought a really disgusting thought/image and it was like a sequence of me doing something disgusting and now idk wha to think why the hell am I thinking it on purpose and imagining it on purpose what does that mean why do I not feel disgusted and why am I willingly thinking of it with no anxiety and no disgust. At the start of my ocd when I had harm ocd I was terrified of thinking of harm thoguhts and wanted them to go away and now I’m deliberate thinking of these disgusting pocd thoughts on purpose

Christyb3

Date posted: 1y

Take a deep breath.....there is no right or wrong way to feel about thoughts. Ocd likes to tell us "you didn't respond to this the right way so you must be the monster you think you are" the trust is your not. Your not your thoughts. The more you fear the thought the more it will stick around. The more you fight the thought the more it will stick around. And the more you check your body's response, the more the thought will stick around. Let the worries and thoughts float in one ear and out the other. Do question it, do not judge it. Don't give it another second of your precious life's attention. As someone the struggle with intrusive thoughts, just know your not alone.

lu22

Date posted: 1y

@Christyb3 But I don’t even know what I feel anymore but I feel like I don’t feel disgusted or anxious and the fact I’m deliberately imagining such horrible thoughts doesn’t that means there’s something wrong with me I can so easily think of it and not care and I’ve never even had this theme before today I woke up and I was worrying I would start imagining it again and later on in the day I started imagining it over and over that disgusting thing but I don’t know why and I’m not get anxious or feel disgusted jsut feel nothing

Christyb3

Date posted: 1y

What you describing is "checking" your checking your mind, body, and soul to see if your responding correctly. It's extremely common with ocd sufferers. The repeating thoughts as well.

lu22

Date posted: 1y

@Christyb3 Thanks I feel like I don’t even know what I feel anymore like I don’t know when I’m anxious or when I don’t like something I’ve had ocd for two years now and I’ve become desensitised and feel like I don’t know how I feel 😞 thanks for your reply I really appreciate it

lu22

Date posted: 1y

@Christyb3 Also I felt like I almost became obsessed with imagining thoughts to test myself and now I’m worried I’ve become obsessed like how can I stop myself from thinking about it on purpose it feels like because I don’t know how I feel It feels like I don’t have a reason to not think about the thoguhts ?

lu22

Date posted: 1y

@Christyb3 Also now im thinking what if im not testing myself? What if im jsut thinking about it anyway? I keep thinking my whole life I’ve never thought I was this or had any problems and all of a sudden it feels like im thinking of disgusting things and im not sure if im testing myself I feel really confused

lu22

Date posted: 1y

@Christyb3 Sorry for sending so many

Christyb3

Date posted: 1y

It's OK. Ocd is so upsetting and confusing. Ocd is going to make you question youself. Try not giving to thoughts any power. The more you try and controll the thought, how you feel or don't feel, and question it, the stronger it will stick around. Also, staying busy always helps. And self educating about the ocd theme your dealing with always helps me understand what I was dealing with alittle bit. There's no quick tricks or answers. I highly recommend seeking an ocd specialist for help. If you can't afford one yet , like me , self educating is so helpful. There are lots of great books out there too.

lu22

Date posted: 1y

@Christyb3 Thanks for you’re reply tbh I’m wary of finding a therapist because some people on here say that there therapist reported them or didn’t know much about ocd and thought there was something wrong with them and as someone who is very convinced of these things ocd is making me think I am, I need someone who is very understanding because I feel like I’m literally believing it

Christyb3

Date posted: 1y

@lu22 That's why it is supper important to find a therapist the specializes in ocd. The therapists on this nocd app would be a great option. They've heard it all

Anonymousssssss

Date posted: 21w

Intrusive thoughts while self pleasuring

Last night I was self pleasuring. I didn’t set out to think about anything weird but as I was doing it some pocd thoughts were in my brain. I did not get off to them, but I could have. Idk why that is but it is. Idk what to do and idk why I am this way. Is there some science about the brain while aroused or is it possible that the more gross or taboo something is I can like it?? Idk, just want to know if anyone can relate.

Anonymousssssss

Date posted: 21w

Help

I deal pretty heavily with this. The last couple days, I’ve had what I think are urges. Something pops into my head intrusively and then what stems from that is me WANTING to just indulge in it even though it’s gross. I get worried bc I used to struggle w thoughts about my dad for a long time until eventually I just purposely thought of him while self pleasuring and got off to it. While that’s something I did, it is NOT me. It all stemmed from my mental health declining a couple years back, I was never this way before. So I get worried that it almost happened or might happen with my pocd cuz I could never live with myself if it did.

Anonymous

Date posted: 17w

Pocd

Im having weird scary pocd thoughts and i really hate them, i feel like theyre my own thoughts and im freaking out

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