my harm ocd is saying that i have to carry out my harm thoughts and that i have to do it. but i don’t want to? i don’t know how to sit with this it makes me believe that i’m genuinely an evil person :(
What works for me is saying to myself "maybe I do want to do that" and laugh it off". They used to be extremely violent thoughts when I was younger so I feel for you. It's tough
I am not a therapist so take my suggestion with a grain of salt or whatever you wish. But I suggest you reply to your OCD something like "okay... and?" Now this will bother the OCD but that is the point. OCD treatment is like bothering the OCD until the brain realizes it's full of crap, lol. You know your values, OCD attacks your values. Therapy can help reestablish and clarify your values. But in the mean time, don't let OCD win by giving into to its attack. Hope this helps!
As someone with Harm OCD as well I can relate to this feeling where your OCD is saying "if you want me to go away then do it" I've had harm OCD from the age of 17 I'm 24 now and its been towards my mom my brother my neices and nephews my pets it's horrible and makes me feel so much disgust and untrusting of myself but knowing it scares me shows me a lot more than just the fact it goes against my core values it tells me I have a genuinely good heart otherwise I wouldn't panic so much I will say GABA has helped quite a bit with the anxiety part of it you can get it on Amazon I recommend the 750mg ones they work pretty fast and have made a noticable difference in the severity of the OCD anxiety cycle
So sorry 😢 but your very courageous it definitely takes a lot out of you , I’ve been dealing for years not knowing I was actually dealing with OCD but I didn’t know it was harm. My prayers to you and everyone who is dealing with it.
Maybe label those harm thoughts to give you more distance. “Well there’s an intrusive thought”. Also the discomfort you feel when allowing the thought to come and go is part of the healing process. OCD has trained your brain to think of these thoughts as something important. They are intrusive thoughts everyone gets. By seeing them as that and letting the anxiety pass your are retraining your brain to respond properly. This is not easy but you are in the driver seat not your intrusive thoughts that latch on to what you care about.
.. In addition to that, don't sit there. Find something to do following that. It's srd to get out of your head if your brain has nothing else to focus on
Hard*
I was there . It does get better. What helped me was , speaking against them. I never liked them. It’s not easy how long have you had OCD harm ?
@Choosengrace_ i had little times where the thoughts got sticky but i was able to let it go. but it didn’t get this bad until a week ago.
@Choosengrace_ also if you don’t mind me asking what did your harm ocd look like? and what do you mean by speaking against them, i’m curious!
@stargirlll I wish we had a private message . ♥️ mine looked like harm towards someone I love 💕 things I like to enjoy 😉 🌿✨ it was awful . There’s urges that I couldn’t take. I would cry out to God about it . He comforted me ✨🌿♥️
I dont know whats going on. I dont know if its OCD anymore. I know it was in the beginning. Ive been through a lot of trauma and had one little scary thought of killing my sister 4 months ago that has blossomed into this giant idea of me being a serial killer and wanting to hurt everyone (I never had any social issues growing up but I have had some trauma). Recently I’ve been having urges to just give in. And my mental images have been horrible and I can’t stop checking if I like them or not. I think I’ve convinced myself I have. This morning I woke up a shaking mess with an urge to unalive my family and when my mom left for work I was alone with my sister and couldnt stop vomiting uncontrollably. I dont know if i’m upset because I cant hurt anyone and I want to, or if I’m scared and just want my old life back. I was an avid horror and gore lover and now I’m convinced I want to do the things I’ve seen in the movies. Someone please help. I’m ready to check into the psych ward.
i feel the need to say sorry because i’m posting yet again. i’m having a REALLY DIFFICULT episode of ocd that i haven’t had for a few months now. i experience contamination ocd everyday and have constant anxiety attacks, however because that’s so normal to me and doesn’t affect anyone but myself, it doesn’t affect me in the same way harm ocd does. i haven’t had to deal with really bad harm ocd thoughts for a good bit now so i’m struggling so bad right now. if anyone has seen my previous posts (which i’m sure you have), this came about over a small change that happened a couple weeks ago. it’s now blossoming into a full episode. it’s making me feel paralyzed and not want to do anything, but i know in the past i had to force myself to distract myself by actually doing things. i’m supposed to hang out with my friend tomorrow, but i’m so close to cancelling because i feel like i can’t do it. my physical symptoms are also worse than what i feel like i’m used to and it’s terrifying me into thinking i’m gonna get sick. i just don’t know how to get through it. it feels like impending doom and constant panic. i just want to feel like myself again and happy
Does anyone else’s OCD convince them that bad thoughts are not actually that bad…. Like I know they are so why do I feel like they arent😭😭
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