my harm ocd is saying that i have to carry out my harm thoughts and that i have to do it. but i don’t want to? i don’t know how to sit with this it makes me believe that i’m genuinely an evil person :(
What works for me is saying to myself "maybe I do want to do that" and laugh it off". They used to be extremely violent thoughts when I was younger so I feel for you. It's tough
I am not a therapist so take my suggestion with a grain of salt or whatever you wish. But I suggest you reply to your OCD something like "okay... and?" Now this will bother the OCD but that is the point. OCD treatment is like bothering the OCD until the brain realizes it's full of crap, lol. You know your values, OCD attacks your values. Therapy can help reestablish and clarify your values. But in the mean time, don't let OCD win by giving into to its attack. Hope this helps!
As someone with Harm OCD as well I can relate to this feeling where your OCD is saying "if you want me to go away then do it" I've had harm OCD from the age of 17 I'm 24 now and its been towards my mom my brother my neices and nephews my pets it's horrible and makes me feel so much disgust and untrusting of myself but knowing it scares me shows me a lot more than just the fact it goes against my core values it tells me I have a genuinely good heart otherwise I wouldn't panic so much I will say GABA has helped quite a bit with the anxiety part of it you can get it on Amazon I recommend the 750mg ones they work pretty fast and have made a noticable difference in the severity of the OCD anxiety cycle
So sorry 😢 but your very courageous it definitely takes a lot out of you , I’ve been dealing for years not knowing I was actually dealing with OCD but I didn’t know it was harm. My prayers to you and everyone who is dealing with it.
Maybe label those harm thoughts to give you more distance. “Well there’s an intrusive thought”. Also the discomfort you feel when allowing the thought to come and go is part of the healing process. OCD has trained your brain to think of these thoughts as something important. They are intrusive thoughts everyone gets. By seeing them as that and letting the anxiety pass your are retraining your brain to respond properly. This is not easy but you are in the driver seat not your intrusive thoughts that latch on to what you care about.
.. In addition to that, don't sit there. Find something to do following that. It's srd to get out of your head if your brain has nothing else to focus on
Hard*
I was there . It does get better. What helped me was , speaking against them. I never liked them. It’s not easy how long have you had OCD harm ?
@Choosengrace_ i had little times where the thoughts got sticky but i was able to let it go. but it didn’t get this bad until a week ago.
@Choosengrace_ also if you don’t mind me asking what did your harm ocd look like? and what do you mean by speaking against them, i’m curious!
@stargirlll I wish we had a private message . ♥️ mine looked like harm towards someone I love 💕 things I like to enjoy 😉 🌿✨ it was awful . There’s urges that I couldn’t take. I would cry out to God about it . He comforted me ✨🌿♥️
harm ocd is the bane of my existence. people always tell me that if you have anxiety over a thought, that’s ocd. and these intrusive thoughts cause me IMMENSE anxiety. i’m constantly looking for reasons why i’m not what these thoughts tell me i am. but WHY DOES IT FEEL SO REAL?? it’s like i can’t reassure myself that this isn’t me and i don’t want to do it, but i also look for reasons why it’s not me. my brain is constantly telling me “if you don’t act on this, you’ll never feel free”. WHAT EVEN IS THAT?? and why does it feel real?? anytime i think about getting therapy, i constantly think that it’s not going to help me positively but help me realize i am this person. i just wish someone with harm ocd could get into my brain, understand me, and tell me everything will be okay. i wish someone in recovery could tell me that they’ve been where i am, felt the same feelings, thought the same thoughts, and got through it when they thought they wouldn’t. i feel like i’m drowning in it. another thing is i think about how my mom knows a surface level understanding to this form of my ocd, but if she knew it all, i’m scared she’d never look at me the same. i’m scared she’d be scared of me and think i need psychiatric help. IM TERRIFIED.
i’m back in a cycle of having harm related OCD thoughts and feelings and urges and i get these episodes where it’s like i’m disassociating and feel like i’m about to snap and go crazy violent. does anyone else experience this? i need help
i’m having a full on panic attack, i never used to be like this, what tf is happening to me, why am i like this, i’m so convinced i’m a horrible person and i deserve to be shut out forever because of my thoughts, i’m tired of struggling with harm ocd, i’m scared that because i have mental health issues i’m gonna end up ki!!ing someone someday or end up on the news, when i was at work earlier i kept thinking “how easy would it be to ki!! someone and get away with it” someone help, i don’t feel normal, am i crazy?… 😭😭i know that with ocd you’re not supposed to have reassurance and you have to be “okay” with the situation but.. how am i supposed to be okay with feeling like i could hurt someone…
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