- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y ago
Question for “conquerors”
Is it actually possible to get to the point of no longer having a certain intrusive thought or subtype of OCD? Or is it ONLY possible to learn how to deal with it? Thanks
Is it actually possible to get to the point of no longer having a certain intrusive thought or subtype of OCD? Or is it ONLY possible to learn how to deal with it? Thanks
The thoughts don’t disappear forever, but they become less severe. When they pop up, you can manage your reaction, not engage, and resist compulsions. Some days are harder than others-I’ve gotten through a theme, then a trigger will bring it back and the urge to do a compulsion comes back strong. But with ERP, you learn that thoughts are just thoughts. They don’t have to have meaning. You can acknowledge them and move on. My therapist reminds me everyone has intrusive thoughts-even people without OCD. So the goal isn’t to get rid of them, but to just not care if they come up. A personal example for me is washing dishes-I needed to wash them for a really, really long time until they felt perfectly clean. I did exposure work, and now I don’t spend a really long time on each dish, I don’t run hot water over the sponge for several minutes. Sometimes the urge to really scrub comes back. The other day, I watched my friend wash her dishes and it wasn’t the “right” way. But I ignored my brain telling me she was doing it wrong, I sat with the uncertainty of not knowing how her family washes dishes, and I ate popcorn out of the bowl she gave me without trying to mentally clean it too. I had a thought, it wasn’t severe, and I went on with my evening, and focused on my value of spending time with my friend. And I’m getting my life back from my OCD.
And I dono about ‘never’ having a thought again. I really doubt anyone ‘never’ has a thought. You just stop caring as much. It feels like eating to me now. I know I have a bit of a problem with it sometimes, I’ll eat too much junk food. Or forget to eat. But I’m confident I can pull myself out and I notice it.
I agree with the other comments! I know it feels hard and impossible right now, but you’ll stop caring about the thoughts. You might laugh at the silliness when they come in or just know what told to use. Eventually you brain will get the message and the intrusive thoughts will slow down until they are nearly gone! Just remember healing is not linear, so each day will have a new challenge to conquer. You’ve got this!!
@ConqueringisPossible Thank you for that! :)
Hey the conqueror badge indicates a clinical measure of improvement. They measure how much time you are compulsing a day and your quality of life.
@ListenToTheWind Thank u! :) and congrats
Thanks, everyone. I appreciate you sharing your insight and progress. I know I’ll have various intrusive thoughts forever, but there’s also a very physiologically disturbing theme that comes up so I hope I can get to the point where that specific imagery doesn’t come up anymore- because life would suck to even have it keep being a theme. I have to sit with the uncertainty of not knowing what life and my brain will bring down the road, but to avoid despair I will also cherish the hope that with time and practice of not giving it power, it will fade away. I’d much rather have other obsessions to contend with lol
Also curious on how yall get that badge! :) Is it like a specific milestone goal in our treatment or is it the specific/subjective opinion of your therapist? Just wondering
Those of you who have overcome at least a bit, if not all, of your OCD. When you went through the CBT and ERP, did it feel like the end of the world? And how did you face the fact that your fears and uncertainties might actually come to life?
When an intrusive thought comes I can’t just say “that’s not true” and just move on. I always feel like I have to disprove the thought and be able to say it with confidence but the problem is that the ocd doesn’t allow me to feel and say it with confidence so I get stuck for hours or even days. How can I stop feeling like I need to do this?
Looking back, I realize I’ve had OCD since I was 7. though I wasn’t diagnosed until I was 30. As a kid, I was consumed by fears I couldn’t explain: "What if God isn’t real? What happens when we die? How do I know I’m real?" These existential thoughts terrified me, and while everyone has them from time to time, I felt like they were consuming my life. By 12, I was having daily panic attacks about death and war, feeling untethered from reality as depersonalization and derealization set in. At 15, I turned to drinking, spending the next 15 years drunk, trying to escape my mind. I hated myself, struggled with my body, and my intrusive thoughts. Sobriety forced me to face it all head-on. In May 2022, I finally learned I had OCD. I remember the exact date: May 10th. Reading about it, I thought, "Oh my God, this is it. This explains everything." My main themes were existential OCD and self-harm intrusive thoughts. The self-harm fears were the hardest: "What if I kill myself? What if I lose control?" These thoughts terrified me because I didn’t want to die. ERP changed everything. At first, I thought, "You want me to confront my worst fears? Are you kidding me?" But ERP is gradual and done at your pace. My therapist taught me to lean into uncertainty instead of fighting it. She’d say, "Maybe you’ll kill yourself—who knows?" At first, it felt scary, but for OCD, it was freeing. Slowly, I realized my thoughts were just thoughts. ERP gave me my life back. I’m working again, I’m sober, and for the first time, I can imagine a future. If you’re scared to try ERP, I get it. But if you’re already living in fear, why not try a set of tools that can give you hope?
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