Is it actually possible to get to the point of no longer having a certain intrusive thought or subtype of OCD? Or is it ONLY possible to learn how to deal with it? Thanks
The thoughts don’t disappear forever, but they become less severe. When they pop up, you can manage your reaction, not engage, and resist compulsions. Some days are harder than others-I’ve gotten through a theme, then a trigger will bring it back and the urge to do a compulsion comes back strong. But with ERP, you learn that thoughts are just thoughts. They don’t have to have meaning. You can acknowledge them and move on. My therapist reminds me everyone has intrusive thoughts-even people without OCD. So the goal isn’t to get rid of them, but to just not care if they come up. A personal example for me is washing dishes-I needed to wash them for a really, really long time until they felt perfectly clean. I did exposure work, and now I don’t spend a really long time on each dish, I don’t run hot water over the sponge for several minutes. Sometimes the urge to really scrub comes back. The other day, I watched my friend wash her dishes and it wasn’t the “right” way. But I ignored my brain telling me she was doing it wrong, I sat with the uncertainty of not knowing how her family washes dishes, and I ate popcorn out of the bowl she gave me without trying to mentally clean it too. I had a thought, it wasn’t severe, and I went on with my evening, and focused on my value of spending time with my friend. And I’m getting my life back from my OCD.
And I dono about ‘never’ having a thought again. I really doubt anyone ‘never’ has a thought. You just stop caring as much. It feels like eating to me now. I know I have a bit of a problem with it sometimes, I’ll eat too much junk food. Or forget to eat. But I’m confident I can pull myself out and I notice it.
I agree with the other comments! I know it feels hard and impossible right now, but you’ll stop caring about the thoughts. You might laugh at the silliness when they come in or just know what told to use. Eventually you brain will get the message and the intrusive thoughts will slow down until they are nearly gone! Just remember healing is not linear, so each day will have a new challenge to conquer. You’ve got this!!
@ConqueringisPossible Thank you for that! :)
Hey the conqueror badge indicates a clinical measure of improvement. They measure how much time you are compulsing a day and your quality of life.
@ListenToTheWind Thank u! :) and congrats
Thanks, everyone. I appreciate you sharing your insight and progress. I know I’ll have various intrusive thoughts forever, but there’s also a very physiologically disturbing theme that comes up so I hope I can get to the point where that specific imagery doesn’t come up anymore- because life would suck to even have it keep being a theme. I have to sit with the uncertainty of not knowing what life and my brain will bring down the road, but to avoid despair I will also cherish the hope that with time and practice of not giving it power, it will fade away. I’d much rather have other obsessions to contend with lol
Also curious on how yall get that badge! :) Is it like a specific milestone goal in our treatment or is it the specific/subjective opinion of your therapist? Just wondering
When you become a “conqueror” does it mean you’ve completed ERP or you’ve just gotten to a good place with it? If so, how long did it take to finish therapy and how did you finally make progress? I’m having a hard time sticking with it right now as it feels unproductive. I’ve been in ERP for about 2 months and I can’t wait to be done.
I don't have an official OCD diagnosis, although I am near enough certain I have it after a long year of distressing intrusive thoughts and compulsions that have strongly affected my life. Unfortunately though, I do not have the opportunity or the finances to get checked or go to therapy for a good few months at least. Due to this, I have taken it upon myself to teach myself techniques to tackle it and to reduce and not engage in compulsions, as I did not want to take the risk of getting even worse before being able to get help (and desperation lol). For the first time in the past year I feel like I'm finally making some progress in getting better since incorporating these techniques into my life as my symptoms have become more manageable (minus the obvious bad days) at the time being. Is self-recovery actually possible? Has anyone managed to recover without a therapist's help?
The subject of OCD matters to the sufferer because it feels like confirmation that they are fundamentally unlovable and unwanted—as if even existence itself doesn’t want them. They feel like an error, carrying a deep sense of guilt and shame, as if they were inherently wrong. They suffer from low self-esteem and a deep internalized shame, because long ago, they were fragmented and learned a pattern of fundamental distrust—especially self-distrust. But the real trouble doesn’t come from the content of the most vile or taboo thoughts. It comes from the fact that the sufferer lacks self-love. That’s why, when you begin to walk the road to recovery, you’re taught unconditional self-acceptance—because that’s what all sufferers of OCD have in common: if you aren’t 100% sure, if there isn’t absolute certainty, the doubt will continue to attack you and your core values. It will make you doubt everything—even your own aversion to the thoughts. You have to relearn how to trust yourself—not because you accept that you might become a murderer someday—but because you enter a deep state of acceptance about who you truly are. It’s not about becoming a monster at all. It’s about making peace with what lies at the root of the fear. Making peace with the guilt. With the shame. Making peace with yourself and the person you fear you might be. Because that fear is not rooted in reality. It’s not rooted in any true desire to act. It’s rooted in your identity—specifically, in what might threaten it. That’s what confirms the belief that you are fundamentally wrong. And OCD fuels that belief by using intrusive taboo thoughts to attack your very sense of self. But then I wonder: let’s say, for example, someone fears being or becoming a sexually dangerous person—how could that person practice unconditional self-acceptance? I would never accept myself if I were to harm anyone—the thought alone makes me want to cry. I know it’s not about whether or not someone acts on the thought. It’s about the core fear underneath it. So how do you accept yourself when the thoughts—and the feelings around them—feel so completely unacceptable ?
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