ROCD?

Hi everyone, I wondered if anyone with ROCD can relate. When I’m with my boyfriend I’m constantly analysing my own feelings in order to answer the big question do I still love him? For example, if he’s in the mood ;) and I’m not. I think I’ve lost all attraction and should breaks up with him or if we are just chilling I worry that the spark is gone (we’ve been together 4 years) I then constantly try to find reasons why I feel this way. But I am hoping it’s down to ROCD as I still love and want to be with my partner but these thoughts make me feel numb so it is hard for me to fully understand and move forward. I also get very anxious that I missed out on experimenting when I was young. Ie going out to clubs and getting with boys. I worry now that if I’m around someone I find attractive this is an issue and it’s because I suppressed going out and experimenting. This is a reoccurring thought which makes me worry if I should even be in a relationship. However I know that I would never cheat on my partner. Both seem to me as intrusive thoughts I just can’t shift. Can anyone relate?

Username: Iamstrong2024!Iamstrong2024!

Date posted: 39w ago

This describes me to a tee! While I don’t want to give you any wrong advice because I’m still struggling myself, I highly recommend starting therapy! Quite literally all of the examples you provided I’ve dealt with before. Something that I try to do when I’m feeling this way is instead of resisting thoughts and worries, let them be there, no matter how scary. It is normally for every single one of us (even married couples that have been together for years) to find other people attractive. I’m sure you have celebs you think are attractive (I know I do) but that DOES NOT mean you missed out on anything! It’s your brain lying to you and trying to trick you. There are so many accounts on rOCD and relationship anxiety on Instagram that can help (sometimes I find myself using them as a compulsion so be careful). I hope this helps some! Stay strong, you can do this.

Username: Foxy Foxy

Date posted: 39w ago

@Iamstrong2024! Thankyou sm! For such a long time I felt like the only person I the world who is possible of feeling this way, it’s such a weight lifted to know others feel it too and that it could be ROCD. I looked at starting therapy, but had my first consultation and realised the therapist was one of my old school supply teachers😂😂 trust me it’s just my luck, but she did highlight to me this could be ocd. I’m going to start looking for other therapist so hopefully that will really help. I use some instagrams but try to lay off social media as that can be quite triggering for me too xx

Username: Honeyshark Honeyshark

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 39w ago

Yeah that’s ocd. Are you in therapy?

Username: Foxy Foxy

Date posted: 39w ago

@Honeyshark Thankyou! I’m not currently but hopefully looking to start. OCD is quite new to me. Would you recommend any specific types of therapy

Username: Honeyshark Honeyshark

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 39w ago

@Foxy ERP therapy is the gold standard.

Username: LeslieB3LeslieB3

Date posted: 39w ago

hey there, it sounds like you're going through a really tough time with your thoughts and feelings, especially with questioning your relationship due to rocd. it's super hard when your mind is constantly analyzing and doubting your feelings, making it difficult to just enjoy being with your partner. you're not alone in this struggle, many people with rocd experience similar doubts and fears. 💔 by the way, have you heard about this new ai-powered ocd therapy tool called 'unstuck?' when i was dealing with something similar, this free ai ocd therapy tool (unstuckmyocd.com/try) that my nocd therapist recommended really helped me out. i think it'll be especially helpful for you because it provides personalized, step-by-step support for dealing with intrusive thoughts and the constant analyzing that comes with rocd, just like an ocd therapist would. i hate when people promote stuff, but i really think it can help you because it's changed my life. lmk if you have qs or just want to talk more! <3

Username: geochristina

Date posted: 2y ago

ROCD

Please does anyone else have the same thoughts and feelings as I do who suffer with ROCD (bearing in mind I love my boyfriend, he’s the kindest most loving boy and I love him with all my heart) we spend all day laughing with eachother! I’m constantly like: You don’t love him, this isn’t right with him, you’re horrible for stringing him along, break up with him, break up with him, did you ever actually love him, you’re probably a lesbian, you don’t find him attractive, there’s nothing between you two Then in other moments when I’m not feeling this I literally could cry with how amazing he is! 😢🙈

Relationship OCD

Username: Butterfly_23

Date posted: 2y ago

ROCD

General statement/question for anyone who can possibly relate: I've been struggling with ROCD for about 3 months now, the typical "do I actually love him", "what if I don't and I'm just leading him on", "why don't I feel connected any more, this must mean something is wrong with us", "planning the future makes me anxious because we might break up"...the list goes on. I've been especially struggling these past few days. I want a big future with this man and I've never second guessed it until all these intrusive thoughts have come into my life with a bang. I hate them. I feel so emotionally drained and incapable of enjoying the moments I have with him because I'm constantly thinking about the things missing. The fact I struggle to stay present. As we all probably know the age old reassurance after an anxiety inducing thought- I do this fairly often, googling my thoughts and why I'm feeling this way. I am so beyond exhausted. I know I want to marry this man and a future with him isn't scary, it's just significant moments that trigger me and suddenly I'm spiring into the OCD cycle again. I just want to know other people feel the same? I've been feeling so flat and disconnected from everyone, especially him which breaks my heart. I know I love him, so deeply - even writing that my brain said "are you sure you do?". I just want to see if other people experience ROCD similar to me. Thanks

Relationship OCD

Username: Anonymous

Date posted: 1y ago

Anyone relate (ROCD)

I’ve been with my boyfriend for 3 years and he is an absolute angel. All throughout the relationship I would have nightmares and intrusive thoughts “what if he leaves/cheats”. And he would reassure me and treat me like the world revolves around me. Lately I’m realizing this was actually ocd and not anxiety as I had previously thought. I would get paranoid if he didn’t check his messages for a couple hours, I’d get anxious if I saw an ambulance heading toward his street while I was driving, I would ask for reassurance that he loved me constantly. Bear in mind, I have no reason to have these fears. My boyfriend is my best friend and has supported me through thick and thin and he’s amazing. One time a couple months ago I was being a bit snappy with him one night and I had the thought “only people who don’t like their partners are snappy with them” and it just stuck. Now I struggle with intrusive thoughts about my own feelings, do I love him, do I miss him enough, is my relationship going to end because this couple on social media broke up. I could deal with the thoughts about his feelings because he is so so good about making me feel loved but now I’m stuck in this constant guilt loop where I question my relationship for no reason then get anxious and feel guilty for even thinking that way because I think I’m manifesting it. Was wondering if anybody else in a healthy long term relationship has had this happen to them and how you talk yourself down :(

Relationship OCD

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