Is this weird

Hey so my therapist doesn’t know a lot about ocd and I think I might get a new one but she told me that during this time it’s normal to question “my morals” and now I’m scared I’m actually questioning my morals. I haven’t actually thought any questioning thoughts and now I’m scared that I am. I’m scared that I’m going to be okay with harming people, pedophilia, rape, etc. not to ask for reassurance but this is really hard. I’m constantly scared that I’m going to all of the sudden think those things are okay.

At this point I’m pretty sure I’m psychotic. I have intrusive thoughts all day long of me doing a bunch of things that I never and will never do. Images of me poking out my own eyes in all sorts of other horrific things that will have to do with self mutilation. These images have been haunting me for two years with the persisting fear that I will act out on these things one day despite me never wanting to do so. Now on top of these thoughts I am dealing with something else. I keep thinking about the fact that there’s no escape from life other than death and it makes me feel scared and trapped. I can’t stop thinking about this that there’s no escape. It’s scaring me. I want to live I have no desire to die but once I get the intrusive thought about not being able to escape this life is scaring me. I believe I’m going through depersonalization because nothing feels right my surroundings feel unfamiliar I feel unfamiliar. I feel like an alien in a place that seems unknown to me. This all started after I had a panic attack in the shower three weeks ago over my intrusive harm thoughts and in the moment I actually thought that my life was over and that I was about to act out on it but of course I didn’t because it’s just a thought and an obsessive fear. Something I would never do but it felt so real in that momentI almost passed out from the fear. The day after that I felt like nothing was real and I’m still in depersonalization and having panic attacks on the regular but today I got that thought about not being able to escape life and how we’re basically all trapped here. I can’t stop thinking it and it’s making me feel sick. Maybe if I Felt more connected to myself and my surroundings stuff like this wouldn’t bother me but that panic attack destroyed me. Does this sound like OCD or something else?I was completely normal and fine three weeks ago yes I had my intrusive thoughts but they weren’t scaring me or controlling me like they are now.

Hi. I’m just really scared and I want to ask questions. I have been ocd and have been really suffering since December. The intrusive thoughts come like I want them now and it’s more of a “ well oh yeah you want to do that, and it’s gonna happen” and I start panicking and can’t focus and it scares the shit out of me. Is that ocd? Or is there something wrong with my brain and I’m actually some psychopath you see in a movie? I’m terrified. Im scared to be around my family, I’m scared to be around everyone. But I’m scared to be alone as well because I’m alone with the thoughts. What if these aren’t intrusive thoughts and I’m actually some terrible person who’s gonna hurt someone or is actually some psychopath who’s crazy? I hate this so much because I use to be so happy and not have any of these intrusive thoughts or worried that I was going to to hurt someone and now I’m so scared all the time. Can someone please answer some of these questions? I just want to make sure that this is ocd and I’m not a terrible person.