Exposure or too far?

TW! So one of my old hobbies that I like to do was watch those really messed up shocker films. That's what kind of desensitized me to a lot of stuff that I used to draw. One movie that I happen to own on DVD (it was a gift) is the movie Salo'. And for those who have serious pocd that movie can be extremely triggering given the content in the film. Back then that movie really was nothing to me because to me it was just a movie. However I've been thinking about watching it again purely for exposure reasons however a little bit of my head is questioning it given what's the film has and of course the age of the actors in the film. I wonder if it would be a good exposure or maybe it's just not something to dive into again.

ocdnoononi

Date posted: 1y

I legit looked up the movie- saw the cover and immediately got triggered 💀 I think it’s a huge leap if that’s movie is what I think it is .. I couldn’t even get to reading the summary. I think it’s definitely something you need to express to a therapist -like everyone is suggesting.

Applecore

Date posted: 1y

I'm so sorry I didn't mean to get you triggered! I will definitely ask my therapist about this. I do think it'll be a good exposure for me but I don't think I'm ready for it yet. That's just my opinion.

ocdnoononi

Date posted: 1y

@Applecore Nah it’s no reason to apologize- I’m just wondering if it may trigger you more but if you are strong enough then it could be

Applecore

Date posted: 1y

@ocdnoononi As long as I know that it is a feasible goal to watch it again and not feel anything that I think I'll be okay with it. But for right now I'm not ready I know that's for sure. Hope you're having a great day nonetheless :)

Nica

Date posted: 1y

Ask your therapist if that high of an exposure would be okay, though I would guess probably not by a lot of your posts.

Applecore

Date posted: 1y

Should I work up to this one? Funny thing is I actually used to not mind this movie at all. Thank you for all the help you give. 😊

ivefailed.

Date posted: 1y

I know that movie, never seen it. But I I know it can trigger you badly. I'm not a professional but I don't recommend. Ask your therapist tho

Applecore

Date posted: 1y

Half of my battles is trying to figure out what is considered a trigger and what's considered an exposure. Sometimes it's hard to tell the difference 😕

ivefailed.

Date posted: 1y

@Applecore isn't that both? i think a trigger can become an opportunity for exposure. But i didn't arrive there yet. To be fair I have zero therapy work done. I keep relapsing

Canofbeans

Date posted: 23w

Adult content and OCD (18+)

I thought I'd gotten over sexual obsessions, since they haven't been bothering me at all until I had a flare up yesterday. I usually struggle with masturbation due to a combination of both anorgasmia from SSRI medication along with intrusive thoughts, so I thought that an adult film should work fine and went on the hub as per usual. Everything went well until I "finished" and looked at the video title afterwards. My stomach dropped as the title had the word "teen" it in. I felt nauseous and gross because I'd previously struggled and became horrifically suicidal due to the pocd I thought I had under control. Now I know that by the word teen, it means an adult actress that's 18-19 and I'm only 20. But I can't shake the feeling that I'm gross for watching and that it was illegal material, even though I am fully aware that it wasn't, so I've been ruminating over it endlessly. This is more of a vent, but I feel like all the progress I've made with my ocd just went down the drain ☹️

Givenup

Date posted: 13w

Pocd and horrible real events

I think these are the worst real events ive ever done... and Im so triggered because the last thing I want is to be a a P or a MAP... im triggered because I dont want the people ive become friends with on NOCD to block me because they think im a P or a MAP... thats the last thing I want... When I was 18, i unknowingly consumed l*licon a couple times... I didnt know what the term was at the time... I thought that since it was on a public site, and it had millions of views, that i thought it was safe to consume... when I did my research when I was 19 onto what exactly the term was... I was horrified and mortified... I puked and gagged and felt numb for days... it's been 5 years since then... im 23... and the last thing I want is to ever be exposed to this kind of content ever again... let alone consume it... I should've been more knowledgeable and it's my fault... my pocd and real events ocd call me a P and a MAP when these are the LAST things i want to be... I know what I did was wrong and I regret it immensely till this day... and im so overwhelmed...

Anonymous

Date posted: 11w

Need advice plz ❤️

So for as long as I’ve been alive I’ve loved horror/ thriller movies and books. I really only enjoy reading thriller books. Since my harm ocd hit I have slowly started back reading thriller again, but I have to check for triggers before each one I read. There’s been a few books that I was really loving that I had to stop reading because something that would trigger my ocd would come up ( my theme is going crazy becoming dangerous , schizophrenia etc ) so if a character in a book starts hearing voices or something, I get so anxious. I want to be able to read and watch horror / thrillers again. Do I simply need to just continue reading / watching and sit with the anxiety?

Harm OCD

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Exposure or too far?

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