health concern stories

Soo I’ve been struggling with this as well, I keep going to the hospital because I think my liver is failing constantly because I rely on alcohol to go to bed, I finally got my liver ultrasound and organs all checked and everything is fine, last night I fell just to get out of work because I felt “dizzy and wasn’t feeling good” I started worrying about mental health and went to the walk in again, I can’t even go to dinner with my gf anymore because of my OCD, last night I went out to have food and I completely lost it I wanted to leave ASAP, now I’m worrying about my brain health and wondering if everything is right in my head, OCD sucks, but I awake everyday but struggle everyday with the same thoughts, I’m right here with you

I’ve had health ocd since I was sexually abused as a child, it has almost always been focused around fear of getting hiv and it really makes life difficult. I’ve made it to my healthiest relationship ever with someone who is great and I have done so many hiv tests to make sure I don’t have it and haven’t passed it to him but i can never be 100% sure about it I always think maybe results are wrong somehow. The last five months have been hell because I had a possible exposure to blood and I’ve been freaking out doing lots of tests googling on a loop having panick attacks that made me have to leave work … it is being really difficult because it just makes me feel like I could hurt someone that is so great so much, that is my biggest fear. With all of the testing I’ve done the only possibility that I could have hiv but all of my tests are negative is that I have last stage cancer and maybe that could false my results in some way and (of course) I now think I may have hiv + last stage cancer. This illness is really debilitating but I believe I will get better and so will you, hope you are doing better ❤️