does anyone else have a rly hard time getting over fights/ previous issues with partners? my partner messed up a while ago but it really wasn’t a big deal and we bounced back instantly but for some reason i can’t let it go, and the more i try to stop thinking about it the more it pops up in my head. i know our relationship is solid and he is awesome but what can i do to stop these intrusive thoughts and stop self sabotaging??
i am feeling the same way!! me and my partner had some fights in the past and it’s so hard to let go and move forward. frustrating because sometimes i build tension between us from the anxiety that fight has caused us. the only thing i do is really focus on the present and remember that there’s been times where i just really focus on the present. we can’t do anything about the past. only about the present
@hilovely that’s how i feel too. i know he’s my person but my mind will literally not let me forget what happened. if u have any more tips please lmk
i totally get where you're coming from. it's super tough when your brain just won't let go of something, even when you know everything's okay. 💔 it sounds exhausting to deal with those intrusive thoughts that keep popping up despite your best efforts. by the way, have you heard about this new AI-powered OCD therapy tool called 'unstuck'? i've been in your shoes before, and what really helped me was this free AI OCD therapy tool called "unstuck" (unstuckmyocd.com/try) that my NOCD therapist recommended to me. i think it'll be especially helpful for you because it's designed to provide personalized, step-by-step support when OCD latches onto specific thoughts or incidents, just like the situation you're describing with your partner. it's like having an OCD therapist in your pocket, ready to guide you through those moments when your thoughts feel overwhelming. i hate when people promote stuff, but i really think it can help you because it's changed my life. lmk if you have Qs or just want to talk more! <3
@rianjones thank you that’s really helpful! i’ll definitely try that
i’m not sure if this is an ocd thing or just an anxiety thing but i find it very hard to sit comfortably with being not anxious. i used to be involved in a lot of stressful/anxiety inducing relationships or situations in the past and now i’m in really good relationships with friends and my life is a lot less stressful but my brain is stuck in that anxious zone. if i have a good week and i think my life is going really well then the next week i start overthinking everything and searching for something to be wrong and then i make myself anxious over these problems that don’t even exist. it’s like i can’t relax because i expect something bad to happen. i’m not sure if many others have this issue but any advice is appreciated
I always wonder “what if I’m not attracted to my partner” “what if I still have feelings for other people” “what if I cheated on my partner” “what if my partner cheats on me” “what If my partner annoys me and I don’t actually want to be with him” and I’ll do this so much over and over that I get so worked up I’ll criticize him, over analyze him, feel as though I don’t like him. But then an hour later after I find relief ( from telling him, looking things up, talking to my sisters about it) I’ll be in love with him but I won’t fully feel it because I’ll just be thinking about how I just felt before and how bad it was or anticipate it again for the future. So I’m constantly ruining it for myself, and it hurts so bad because he’s so perfect for me and so kind to me and everything about our relationship is right but my mind tries to convince me of other things and it feels so real.
Does anyone struggle with real event ocd and having to confess to their partner? I have so many regrets on things I’ve either done or thought and feel like I can’t move on or be better until I’ve been forgiven for them. Mostly things that happened a couple years ago and I don’t know why it’s all of a sudden bothering me now but it makes me feel like I’m the worst person ever. I’m even questioning how I thought or felt during that time and I’m confessing to thoughts or things I may or may not have done or thought. It’s so confusing and I feel trapped in my own head. If anyone has any tips I would appreciate it. Thank you for you time
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