Hey I’m in a relationship that is so good and strong but I keep having thoughts even when we are together “oh you don’t love him” or “this isn’t really what you want “ “ you feel so much better alone etc” can anyone relate?

I have been in a relationship for almost 3 years and before we went on holiday all I wanted was to get engaged (or so I thought, because people kept saying when are you getting married, when will you have a baby?) and I’m happy the way we are. Then on holiday my BF joked about buying me an engagement present and I had a panic attack and two whole days of worrying, “does this mean I don’t love him anymore, is there something wrong with me”, even picturing myself not being happy on my wedding day so my imagination went wild. I know deep down I don’t ever see a life without him but I feel pressured to follow the path everybody does and I’m just not ready to get married but I’m 34 and people (society) say that’s what I should be doing. I know that I do love my BF very much, we live together and have a pet, so I’m very much committed, but since then I’ve been having urges to ‘check’ I still love him, for example if we cuddle do I feel a certain way, or having constant thoughts in the third person like “she doesn’t deserve him, she is a bad person, she is lying, she doesn’t feel anything” and the thoughts whizz around constantly. I know that this is my condition but I have a wonderful relationship and I am turning cold and distant because I feel so depressed and empty most days. ?

Why does it keep feeling better/right for me to leave my wonderful relationship? It feels more wrong and it hurts more at the thought of staying. I keep hearing in my brain I’m just with him bc I don’t want to be alone, but these thoughts and feelings are driving me crazy. I want to cocoon and be alone but of course I want to stay in this relationship. It’s like my brain doesn’t want to be convinced that I love him or want to stay with him. It’s like it only wants us to be alone so we’re no longer stressed about this stuff. I hate that’s how exhausted I am with all this shit😞any tips/help?

I’ve been with my boyfriend for 3 years and he is an absolute angel. All throughout the relationship I would have nightmares and intrusive thoughts “what if he leaves/cheats”. And he would reassure me and treat me like the world revolves around me. Lately I’m realizing this was actually ocd and not anxiety as I had previously thought. I would get paranoid if he didn’t check his messages for a couple hours, I’d get anxious if I saw an ambulance heading toward his street while I was driving, I would ask for reassurance that he loved me constantly. Bear in mind, I have no reason to have these fears. My boyfriend is my best friend and has supported me through thick and thin and he’s amazing. One time a couple months ago I was being a bit snappy with him one night and I had the thought “only people who don’t like their partners are snappy with them” and it just stuck. Now I struggle with intrusive thoughts about my own feelings, do I love him, do I miss him enough, is my relationship going to end because this couple on social media broke up. I could deal with the thoughts about his feelings because he is so so good about making me feel loved but now I’m stuck in this constant guilt loop where I question my relationship for no reason then get anxious and feel guilty for even thinking that way because I think I’m manifesting it. Was wondering if anybody else in a healthy long term relationship has had this happen to them and how you talk yourself down :(