SO OCD

So my SO OCD has been crazy today. I’m in a very committed relationship with a boy I love but now I think that I may have a crush on a girl I see in rehearsals for this play I’m in. Funny, but I didn’t think of her that way before I started ruminating. I feel like I sort of willed this “crush” into happening as a sort of way to figure out my sexuality. She is very pretty and there are aspects I like about her, but there are also things about her personality I don’t like. Granted, I’ve never felt romantic or sexual attraction to women. All my crushes have been men and I’m 27. Has anyone ever felt this way? I feel a tremendous amount of fear and guilt. “What if I like this person?” “What if I’m Bi or Bi-curious?” “Should I leave my partner?” I don’t feel like I align with dating women and I don’t feel comfortable having romantic feelings for a woman, but I feel like I do. I certainly don’t want to have a crush on someone while in a committed relationship. Any advice or well wishes would be nice….

JulioKelle

Date posted: 1y

Hey! I also struggle with this. I actually don’t want to go out in public in fear of this. Remember with OCD it’s like your mind is trying to gaslight you into believing things that are uncomfortable to be true! There are also ways to ERP therapy and find ways to appropriately expose yourself to these situations and navigate how you truly feel and not what OCD wants you to believe. Hope this helps!

savvyp

Date posted: 1y

@JulioKelle Hey! Thank you for that. I’m going to therapy and working on battling these thoughts. A lot of times I feel like I actually do have these romantic feelings for this person. It’s so wild. Pretty much the worst case of OCD I’ve undertaken this far….

JulioKelle

Date posted: 1y

@savvyp I’m there with you. I don’t have the money or the resources for a therapist, and an app called unstuck has also really helped me experience AI generate ERP which helps restructure my thought distortions as well as help with journal entries! It’s helped me SO MUCH! But also keep wiring in here, I know it always helps me to at least know I’m not the only one. I used to think I was going mad and there was no stopping the spiral. But there is hope and remember life is a journey, we can’t get it right all the time the first try:/. Be patient and stay strong!

Kelsey L

Date posted: 1y

Also keep in mind, what is the worst that could happen? Let’s say you are dating a man and also happen to be bisexual and have a same sex crush (not saying this is true). Crushes are very surface level and usually fleeting. Having a crush doesn’t mean you need to end your relationship. It’s probably going to pass. If you’re really secure with your boyfriend, you can even talk to him about how your feeling.

yaya_zz

Date posted: 24w

Sexual ocd

Hey guys so I have been suffering with sexual ocd due to the fact that I don’t feel that romantic spark with him anymore, I love him and I know I do but I get to much in my thoughts thinking about why can’t I feel that anymore what has changed what if I don’t wanna be with anymore I’ve been with him for 4 years and at first I think it was ROCD but now I started thinking what if I’m into girls now I’ve always been the type to say oh a girl is so pretty or I like this about her but now I feel like every time I see a girl I’m like do I see myself in a relationship with her oh she’s pretty oh I like her voice do I find it attractive and sometimes I do !!! Which is killing me I feel disgust thinking about because what if I secretly am no shame to people who are my sister herself is but I just feel wierd because I wanna be with my husband and feel happy there not with a girl and feel like a man because I see myself in the mirrior and I’m like do I myself being a man do I look lesbian? Do I act lesbian or bi? What if secretly I wanna be a man or I imagine myself being a man in a relationship with a pretty girl and idk what to think

Sexual Orientation OCD

Pogoshow

Date posted: 21w

SOOCD

I’ve been dealing with SOOCD for over a year now, and I have been having a very hard day today. I feel like I just need someone to talk too, my whole life I’ve always had girl crushes and always wanted to be romantic with women . Ever since I posted this picture on instagram and one person said I looked “zesty” in it , which is when I started obsessing about being gay . I feel like I put so much meaning to these thoughts where now I’m always checking how I feeling around men. I had a really bad porn addiction for a long time and bad anxiety which fucked up my sex drive. I feel like I doubt if I’m attracted to women when I know I am , but the doubt is so overbearing where I start to believe it . I never was interested in men sexually, and my ocd makes me feel like I like the thoughts even though I feel no pleasure out of it. I feel like I lost who I am as a person . It feels like I don’t even know what my sexuality is and it’s really upsetting to me . I meant this girl the other day and she is the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met and I just feel like ocd is getting in the way😭😭😭 please any advice or comments

anonymouscookie

Date posted: 19w

so ocd and bisexuality

Hello everyone, I just wanted to share a part of my journey that I’m struggling with right now. I’ve been diagnosed with ocd and while this is not my first subtype, ROCD and so ocd have definitely been the ones I’ve been struggling with the most. For context I have a boyfriend who I love very much and am terrified of loosing. That’s probably what ocd latched onto. The so-ocd especially is tricky because I’ve come to acknowledge that I am bisexual. Don’t worry I didn’t “discover” this through ocd, I’ve always known and it’s been in the back of my mind way before ocd, I had just never really directly acknowledged it because romantically I just always leaned towards men. The thing my ocd latched onto is “what if you are actually a lesbian and don’t know it yet and will have to leave your partner or are lying to your partner or end up leading him on” The thing is, I don’t have much experience with women except kissing my female best friend once, which didn’t feel special or made me have romantic feelings for her. I’ve always seeked men more actively than women and didn’t feel like I was gonna miss out if I get into a serious relationship with a man before having had more experience. I just know that I can be sexually attracted to women as well. But now that I’m in this beautiful relationship I’m terrified of getting it wrong or having missed something about myself or being scared that I’m actually a lesbian and have been lying to myself all along. I’m not seeking reassurance, just wanting to share and maybe someone else is going through something similar? If so I’d be so grateful to know I’m not alone. I love my boyfriend dearly and i really hope we will work out in the long run.

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond

SO OCD

Related posts

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Be a part of the largest OCD Community