I’m constantly wondering if my boyfriend really likes me. Its taken a huge toll on my self esteem—both personality and appearance, and I feel horribly insecure and self conscious all the time. Anyone else gone through this or any tips?
Yeah, I'm with you on the self esteem problems. I don't know what high or even moderate self esteem looks or feels like. I've been down on myself for a long time. I want to change it
@BigGyro09 Me too. Sorry to hear that. You absolutely have the potential to change it though and I hope you get to soon. ❤️
@Anonymous243 I hope so too. I just don't know how, but I hope I can
@BigGyro09 I feel the same way. I think sometimes those changes can happen without us knowing until later on and we just have to keep trying and do our best to find happiness around everything else going on 🤷
@Anonymous243 I definitely think it's due to outside influences that we can't control and limiting believes we hold when we were younger. When I was a kid I remember having such a problem believing that people can be mean for no reason and that really bothered me. I thought the world wasn't like that until I had experiences that told me otherwise. I think most of my self esteem issues stem from the difficult things I was dealing with as a kid and a teenager. Maybe it's an inner critic issue mostly.
@BigGyro09 Yeah, I can definitely relate. And it’s hard to unlearn those things too, cause it feels like we’ve always thought this way and don’t know how to do it any other way.
@Anonymous243 Yeah, exactly. I'm just hoping therapy can sort all of this out. Quite frankly, after a while, I'm sick of it. Even though this feels like "the norm" it's still hurts more than it usually does every now and then.
@BigGyro09 Yeah. I’m trying therapy and just started on some medication. 🤞. For some reason the fact that it is the norm usually is what makes it feel more painful for me. Its hard to remind myself that there are ways to quiet some of the noise but I’ll stay dedicated to trying to find more solutions as best I can. I hope you can do the same. Maybe we will always deal with some aspect of this disorder but the current “norm” could change to a new type of norm that’s a bit less painful.
@Anonymous243 I hope the medication works for you! And yeah, the norm that is OCD makes us forget that things weren't always like this. I would love to get back to where I was before this all started. It's like all of my negative thoughts and perceptions of myself and other things are just amplified now. A part of me feels like they've always been there but I haven't deeply looked into it and I wasn't reminded of it every single second of the day. The new norm for me is to just lessen the repetition of these awful thoughts.. just enough to where is feels like I can manage what I'm thinking or at least have enough confidence to say no to the unwanted, unhelpful thoughts.
@BigGyro09 Right? It’s so hard to say no and to accept the uncertainty behind all the thoughts. It takes so much work every single day. I’m sorry to hear you’re struggling. Also, I want you to know that a few months ago I made a post about my boyfriend’s porn addiction and what I was going through with it in regards to relationship ocd. You left a comment on it and it has been one of the most helpful things to me in going through this new ocd theme and in going through that general struggle in my relationship. I go back often to reread it to calm myself down. You really left a mark on my experience and I truly hope you can find some relief in this disorder. You seem very smart and I know you are capable of getting through this, step by step. ❤️ maybe you can’t get back to that exact place, but get to a new place that is full of even more beautiful things than what you began with.
Lately, I’ve been feeling like my relationship isn’t real. I keep thinking: • Why am I even with him? • Do I actually like him, or am I just used to him? • What if I’m just convincing myself that I like him? I feel numb, disconnected, and nothing I tell myself reassures me. Sometimes, I get really irritable when we talk, I don’t feel joy, and I start overanalyzing everything. It makes me feel like the absolute truth is that I don’t like him, and I’m just in denial. I also heard that when you don’t like someone, there’s no anxiety—just relief. But I have moments where the thought “I don’t want to be with him” crosses my mind, and I don’t feel anything at all. And because I don’t panic immediately, I start thinking “Maybe this means it’s true.” I’ve read that love isn’t about feeling excitement 24/7, but my mind keeps telling me that if I don’t feel connected, if I have to search for reasons why I like him, that must mean I don’t. I feel like I’m losing touch with my emotions, and no matter what I do, I can’t seem to feel love or happiness the way I used to. It’s like I keep waiting for some proof that I truly want to be with him, but I never find it. Has anyone else felt this way? I feel like I’m trapped in this endless doubt, and I don’t know what’s real anymore.
Hi I don’t know but I’ve being having so much stress in my relationship with my boyfriend and I feel like I’m upset at him with small things and taking it out on him like when he looks at other girls or when he repost things with girls it upsets me and changes my mood and people tell me to talk about it with him but I don’t know how to talk to him about it because I don’t necessarily know how I feel I feel mad and upset and I feel like crying but I also just can’t express how I feel and I don’t know what to even say to him to communicate how I feel I found this app by googling”how to feel more stable in my relationship” I feel like I’m not in a relationship sometimes and I just want everything to work out with him but I don’t know what to do I wanna feel like all those relationships you see and feel loved and want to have a future but I don’t know how to get there
Heyy so has anybody ever experience in rocd like ur scared that what if u liked somebody else or had a crush on somebody else even tho u never had no romantic or sexual feelings for anybody else only ur bf but u still question urself?
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