Username: Anonymous 25#

Date posted: 28w ago

Can anyone share?

Hi I’m looking to connect with people who are experiencing harm/suicidal and pure ocd. I’ve had these themes for a while. The compulsive behaviors have always been in my head (ruminating,catastrophes,what ifs, intrusive commands “do it”, “you want to”, “you will”, “you’re suicidal “). I’ve had other themes in between but these specific ones aren’t letting go. I’m in ERP therapy through NOCD for the last few months, my therapist is great but I’m just having a hard time. I’m just wondering if anyone has overcome these themes? What exposures have you done and how did you get through it? How long did it take you? Etc … any shared experience is greatly appreciated thanks

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 28w ago

Hi i have Pure OCD and i get harm, taboo all the above... i have overcome Suicidal OCD by recording myself saying over and over how i am going to hurt myself, eventually my brain learned that just having the thought is not dangerouse, i still get some here and there but then i tackle it the same way. OCD sucks but keep trusting ERP it works... Hope this helps, i am trying to apply the same thing on my other themes now....

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 28w ago

so you can go i have the intrusive thought i am going to fill the blank and recorded and listen to it over and over and over, at the beggining is scary but then after a while you will be getting bored from hearing it....

Username: Anonymous 25#Anonymous 25#

Date posted: 28w ago

@Anonymous So for the suicidal theme for example , just say like “I’m having the thought of shooting/killing myself” ?

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 28w ago

@Anonymous 25# yes i had intrusive though of putting a gun in my mouth and shot, the more extreme you the more ERP will work.

Username: Anonymous 25#Anonymous 25#

Date posted: 28w ago

@Anonymous And you just recorded yourself saying that like on your phone and just kept listening to it ? Sorry I just wana make sure I do this right

Username: Soccer fan10Soccer fan10

Date posted: 28w ago

Yeah this subtype is hard, Michael j Greenberg has helped me a lot with this, you can google him and look him up on YouTube, solid stuff.

Username: Endlessly PonderingEndlessly Po...

Date posted: 28w ago

Still struggling with this, one of the most terrifying things I have been through

Username: Who_knows?Who_knows?

Date posted: 8w ago

@Endlessly Pondering Hi how are you ? Currently my theme and wondering if you overcame this ?

Username: Endlessly PonderingEndlessly Po...

Date posted: 8w ago

@Who_knows? Hi! Doing so much better. Therapy and meds help a ton. You got this’

Username: Who_knows?Who_knows?

Date posted: 8w ago

@Endlessly Pondering How long did it last for you ? I’m scared of meds , I just don’t wanna have a bad reaction to them . Can I ask if you were ever scared of being depressed ?

Username: Endlessly PonderingEndlessly Po...

Date posted: 8w ago

@Who_knows? Like a year 🤦🏻‍♂️ Totally understand the hesitancy for meds. Absolutely, at one point The thoughts got so bad They did send me into a depression. I could barely eat or move. Working with a psychiatrist and therapist helps tremendously. Don’t be afraid to reach out for help, that is their job jobs to help you.

Username: Who_knows?Who_knows?

Date posted: 8w ago

@Endlessly Pondering What was tour experience with this theme ? Like thoughts wise ? When you went into depression did the thoughts attack ? I feel like when I’m sad the thoughts attack and make me “confused” or make me question and it makes me even sadder and panic

Username: Endlessly PonderingEndlessly Po...

Date posted: 8w ago

@Who_knows? Constant thoughts about suicide. I want to die, I don’t want to live, what happens when I die, etc. it was brutal and debilitating. There were days I couldn’t move or eat. But it’s very treatable by professionals. What are your thoughts?

Username: Who_knows?Who_knows?

Date posted: 8w ago

@Endlessly Pondering Same !! It’s not so much to suicide it’s more so depression now and then the suicidal ocd latches to that

Username: Endlessly PonderingEndlessly Po...

Date posted: 8w ago

@Who_knows? What are your compulsions?

Username: Who_knows?Who_knows?

Date posted: 8w ago

@Endlessly Pondering Mental compulsions telling myself I would never , and telling my husband what if it happens , or coming on this app seeing everyone’s stories and asking what thoughts they have . 🫠🫠

Username: Endlessly PonderingEndlessly Po...

Date posted: 8w ago

@Who_knows? Literally the same lol. It’s going to be so hard, but what happens when you don’t do your compulsions?

Username: Who_knows?Who_knows?

Date posted: 8w ago

@Endlessly Pondering Freak out and am in my head so much arguing with myself and asking everyone do you think I’m depressed (some say yes) then I got hot flashes with anxiety and my stomach drops . Then I come back on this website to see stories of my same subtype 🫠🫠

Username: ZmanflexZmanflex

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 28w ago

I share these themes, especially the suicide theme. I too am in therapy through NOCD. I’ve not overcome the themes and may never according to my therapist. Just learning skills to better overcome them and accept uncertainty. It’s so hard and I totally know where you’re coming from. I ruminate a lot and always have the thought “kill myself” in my head. I’m currently working on different exposures including putting a belt around my neck and just sitting there accepting uncertainty as hard as it is. I hope this doesn’t trigger you. I’m just being honest. I’ve only been in therapy for approximately three weeks so this is all new to me. Never in a million years would I have thought I’d be going through this. I’ve been dealing with it for over 20 years.

Username: Anonymous 25#Anonymous 25#

Date posted: 28w ago

@Anonymous Trust me I get it. It’s been a journey and sometimes it feels like there’s no way out. The exposures are brutal. I’ve had to watch videos, sit in a closet with a weapon, write out the word suicide over and over. Truthfully my main trigger are just the thoughts themselves and that starts up the whole rumination cycle. I was just asking any other thing people recommended for this theme because it’s been stuck for me for a while.

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 28w ago

Dont worry about if it triggers me, more exposure for me, i just got diagnose about a year ago of my OCD becoming a dad trigger my OCD genes, i am learning so much about my thought patterns and all that OCD bullshit, i am learning to no be afraid to have fear, we just need to retrain our brain, it will get better stick with it. You got this.

Username: Anonymous 25#Anonymous 25#

Date posted: 28w ago

@Anonymous I’ve been praying for a breakthrough!

Username: ZmanflexZmanflex

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 28w ago

@Anonymous 25# That’s exactly me too! Just the thoughts are my triggers. When asked by my therapist what triggered me, I was like just the thoughts! It sucks

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 28w ago

@Anonymous 25# it will come just stick with it

Username: ZmanflexZmanflex

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 28w ago

Does anyone say things out loud like “I want to kill myself” or “I’m going to kill myself”? I feel like it’s another exposure

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 28w ago

yes i repeat over and over and i over exagerated too. Like after i am dead is going to be so much blood around and all that stuff

Username: Anonymous 25#Anonymous 25#

Date posted: 28w ago

@Anonymous Did it work?

Username: Who_knows?Who_knows?

Date posted: 8w ago

Hi saw this post , currently my theme and was wondering what y’all experiences have been with this ? It’s tough ! Doesn’t so much bug me anymore but when I am sad I get scared of depression and the thoughts that come with it and the suicidal ocd latches to it . Any tips would be greatly appreciated

Username: Kenzie Madison

Date posted: 2y ago

Those with Harm OCD

Hey guys. I’ve been dealing with Harm OCD for around 3 and 1/2 months now, and it’s been extremely difficult to experience. I’ve had OCD my whole life and some of my family members do as well, one of my cousins actually has the same main subtype as me, but he was diagnosed almost a year ago when I didn’t have it myself. I’ve been going to an OCD & Anxiety Treatment Center the past week and I’m really struggling with the exposures we do there, as well as the ones we do at home. I constantly feel like I’m judging myself and I genuinely feel worthless, like I’m a horrible person to have unwanted intrusive thoughts like these. I feel like it’s so difficult to stay mindful and to not judge any of the thoughts that surface. Those with Harm OCD, have any of you here gone from debilitating OCD to living fulfilling lives? If so, what was the process like for you, if you’d like to share? Thanks and I hope you’re all doing well, or are continuing to improve.

Username: Anonymous 25#

Date posted: 42w ago

Harm/suicidal ocd

I’m looking for my harm/suicidal ocd people here to shed some light and hope. I’m not asking for reassurance (I know we can’t do that with OCD) but just people who can share their experiences and what has worked for them in dealing with and overcoming this awful theme. Thanks in advance.

Username: Anonymous

Date posted: 36w ago

Suicidal ocd

Can others with suicidal ocd share some common symptoms they noticed/experience with this theme?

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