- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
Ruining excitement
I really don’t like it when OCD ruins excitement. Excitement is usually a rare feeling for me , but it feels like I’m walking on ice, trying not to let ocd “ruin” my excitement. 🙃
I really don’t like it when OCD ruins excitement. Excitement is usually a rare feeling for me , but it feels like I’m walking on ice, trying not to let ocd “ruin” my excitement. 🙃
I relate to you, you arnt alone. Emotions are meant to be felt and life is full of all different ones, right? Something that has helped me is that when I feel super bad about a “possibility” or “intrusive thoughts” I challenge myself to give the same amount of attention to a thought that is positive and happy. You deserve to feel excited for a moment even if that means ocd will take it away. I hope you can find balance ❤️
Maybe you will have one maybe you won't. Thinking and focusing on the feeling is what makes it more powerful and persistent. I know it's hard but try not to care because the reality is that even if you do have one it doesn't matter! It's just a lil thought and then it can go away with practice. I went to a concert last night and was terrified of having ocd thoughts. TADA I had OCD thoughs.... But I felt maybe yes maybe no and let it go just as it came and a lil later I was back to enjoying the music! I had so much fun last night it was amazing! What helped me the most is accepting that I will have more OCD thoughs forever just like literally every other human haha. They just don't have to matter we make them matter.
I know everyone has negatives but it’s like they’re the only thing I see with him. Even when I was anxious and felt like this I was still able to enjoy the good moments and feel love. There was so much about him that I would love like we are literally the same person and that is so rare to find. Now over time it’s gotten worse and worse. Like the more I see the bad the more I convince myself. Partly cause when I was with him those times I was analyzing everything that was bad. And my brain kept saying you can’t end up with someone like this. And it’s become so real. Now I feel nothing and it’s so scary like nothing at all. I feel like it’s my mind trying to protect me because I keep thinking that if I leave I can have relief and also not worry anymore but I don’t think that’s what I really want. It’s just hard because the negatives are definitely something that scare me like being irritable and hard to talk things out so I think somehow something is blocking me from letting me feel cause I’m afraid to stay? This sucks I don’t want to feel like this about him has anyone gone through this???? If I’m so anxious to feel will I ever let myself feel again???
I hate how ocd targets everything I love to do. Walking, excercising, gym… I used to love those things. It was my therapy. It were the things I could escape my thinking. Now those are the things i get stuck in my head. Why? It makes me sad. Sorry not so positive today.
With real event OCD, I don’t know if any of you feel this way, but do you ever feel that the past event(s) that you ruminate about or constantly obsess about are gonna come up in your future and just absolutely ruin you, that’s how I’ve been feeling for months, it just feels like impending doom, and I hate having to even think that my future would be ruined by what I did as a teenager, and I did some dumb things, that I regret so deeply, I just can’t stop thinking about that.
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