People usually say on every podcast I’ve listened to that their ocd says “what if they are gay” but deep down they don’t think they are. For me it’s I think I am I don’t want to be because I love my boyfriend and want to Be with him and don’t want to be with a girl. but I don’t know. One thing I do know is that I don’t want to be. Is this the same? I don’t have a knowing anymore that I’m actually straight. Can anyone relate?
For me it is this way : sometimes i feel that im actually just straight and that deep down im straight, and dont want to be gay. Sometimes i feel so convinced that i must be gay or that ive always been gay all my life and it even feels like i know im gay and just dont want to admit and accept it. So for me, these two alternate. 😟
@ninkaninga Same I alternate between the two as well but when it’s really bad it’s usually the second !
@helpmeimsoscared Yes, when it gets really bad and really scary and really convincing😞 it always gets me always, lets say i do feel better and im like ohh okay, its just ocd, and then again, it hits me, and oooh its such a terrible feeling😔
I don't alternate, for me I just think Im into dudes everyday
@helpmeimsoscared Feel the same thing. In my recovery journey that is the last thing that keeps me stuck but I can honestly say this is the last thing that so-ocd can keep me stuck on . If you want to talk about it just lmk
@ejpwolfpack Yes let’s talk!!
@helpmeimsoscared What platform would you like to talk on? I got insta or phone number. I can share a lot of stuff that my therapist has helped me with
I just actually believe I'm into dudes most of the time, and the whole "deep down" thing it's always a trigger for me, cause it actually feels I'm just a person in denial, but I don't want any of this, but it does feel like I know it's true and I just don't accept it
@Nicolas:) Well yea, i do relate to you. For me its even harder because ive never had a relationship, never kissed anyone etc. so i dont even know if im gonna like it with a man one day. So….
@ninkaninga I did had a relationship but I didnt like it and My OCD use it as evidence that I have to be into dudes instead
Like do most people that have SOOCD think they might be gay, but don’t want to be and want to be straight? Or does everyone with soocd 100% think they’re straight? Like I want to be straight but I’m not 100% I am and my intrusive thoughts are killing me, like I don’t want to be but I’m not even certain anymore
Beyond the what ifs - Does anyone else feel like their OCD tells them they have to be gay... I don’t want to be with a woman but it feels like I have to be gay. I’m trying to tell myself it’s OCD and that it’s a lie...but what if it isn’t? What if I’m lying to myself that I don’t want to be with a woman but I actually do?
Hi guys, do you ever feel, even when the anxious feelings are gone (and your not in the back door spike window) that you still dont know who you are and what you're afraid of ( for instance in this case, not being straight) is actually true and that whole OCD cycle you're in might or might not be OCD but it doesnt matter because you're just using it as a way of proving that what you're feeling is normal and not actually face the truth? these are my thoughts right now... I was doing well, but even when I am doing well I still think about those stuff idk... like how do I know what true love is? am I faking my love for my bf and one day I'll be tired and actually just "want to accept the truth because its lighter?" becaus at that point I really feel like I'm in a movie and just playing the role of someone. Between renée rapp coming out as a lesbian after saying she was bi and sophia bush an Chrishell stause falling in love with women after being with men all their life its been kind of a triggering week (even tho when I learned it felt like I was happy like yes! they're a part of the lgbtq+ community as if I was part of that community too which triggered me even more) PS : no disprespect to anyone I'm just really triggered and confused!!
So I’ve struggled with sexual orientation ocd for a while now, along with relationship ocd. I’ve been with my boyfriend for 4 years as of yesterday (in a straight female, dating a straight male) and I was just on tik tok, and seen a girl who posted a picture of her crying and saying “me realizing I was gay and not wanted to leave my boyfriend because he’s my bestfriend” and now I’m in a whole panic attack. Because what if I’m gay and I don’t wanna leave my bf, or what if I’m in a denial, or something idk. And it feels so real. Idk what else to do anymore
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