- Date posted
- 1y
Can't tell if it's POCD or I'm just overthinking
I'm not sure if I'm developing POCD or if I'm just overthinking. It didn't start out this way at first when I was worrying but now I feel deep anxiety and dread just thinking about children. I befriended a 15 year old last year on a Discord server because we had the same obsession and crush on the same fictional character. I thought he was a very chill and fun person to talk to. I didnt know his age until I asked him in the DMs. I'm very much not used to talking to anyone whos underaged as I spend pretty much my entire time talking to people my age and older. I definitely tried to keep things as age appropriate as possible but sometimes he would bring up topics that I wouldn't think were appropriate to talk to between an adult(I'm in my very early 20s) and a 15 year old. I just never put up the boundary of saying that I don't want to talk about it and tried not to get too deep into whatever he brought up and change the topic. I get freaked out and scared that what if I'm having inappropriate conversations with a minor and I'm going to be exposed as a fucking freak who had a weird convo with a child. I definitely frequently point out that hes a minor and I'm not a minor to keep that boundary between us. I'm now scared of being canceled if I ever decide to put myself out there and post my own art. I've had so much body tension and chest tightening to the point I was scared about the possibility of a heart attack.